certain phrases which give me the irrational rage. Anyone else?

[NolansEpicDressSense]

'is your husband babysitting?' actually that's not an irrational one. It annoys the fuck out of me.

'I am eating my meal'. No you're not, you're eating your breakfast/dinner/tea/lunch/supper/whatever you want to call it, not your meal.

Meal is for chickens.

That is all.

"Cleanse", particularly in adverts. What's wrong with "clean"?

Pardon my French : usually followed by a fake guilty look

You're an adult - fucking swear or don't fucking swear just don't say Pardon My French you twat.

" I was literally DYING"

THEN WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU STILL WITH US.

game changer - makes me want to scream.

Sports commentators: "xx is asking all the questions". "Has he got enough in his locker?"

And speaking of questions...
"begs the question". It does not mean "raises the question".

I'll have a continent please Carol.

Nooo

It's consonant you moron.

he did awesome NO it is he did awesomely ( that is if you have to say it at all)

"Snuggle"- it's as bad as moist.

"She was sat there" no you mean "she sat" or "she was sitting"

"In the event of" a phrase can almost always be replaced by"if"

I did NOT know that about Asda being the Associated Dairy thingy. Interesting.

Tescos, Asdas, yes, annoying - but OTOH, no one in the history of the world ever said "I'm just nipping to Sainsbury".

Others - "[facile observation], I'll tell you that for free". Oh thankyou - because of course I do normally pay for conversations.

"To be fair...".

"In the round".

I'll think of more.

Calling something 'mental'

And saying 'I'm a bit OCD'

And 'stabby'.

My mother's lack of grammar drives me mad.

A prime example was when speaking about DD doing something last week: "she done it really good!"

I can't stand stand it. I do have issues with her though, and the grammar (lack of) doesn't help.

Mother: "So I see the umbrella, right... "

Me: "You mean, you saw the umbrella... "
Mother (indignant): "That's what I said!"

"So what have you got to tell me?" In the context of a catch up with friends etc.

it always makes my mind go blank and puts me on the spot. I like spontaneous conversation!

Oh, and my DS' girlfriend says...

'What is air?'

And 'naaah then/den.'

And 'LOL' or 'JK!' out loud.

She's a lovely, wonderful girl, but those four phrases get on my nerves, I admit.

Caitlin17 I'm with you on the 'snuggle' word. If you have to use it, it's "snuggle up",not just "snuggle" on its own. Have read some appalling cheap American kindle books where the heroine used this constantly. It really got my goat (I'm sure that last phrase will annoy the fuck out of someone but there you go)

I have never heard anyone say LOL in real life. Hoping I never do too :)

It was to die for - my mum uses this about puddings - grrr
I was sat - AARGH was sitting
I text him - no NO you texted him or even better sent him a text

"Wow just wow"
"Political correctness gone mad" (translation I'm losing the argument but this is my trump card)

Someone mentioned "outwith" yes unless you are drafting a legal contract where it can be useful.

Generally people using legal terms incorrectly, especially Americanisms in the context of English law and English terms in the context of Scots Law.

I understand you're not legally qualified but just refer to the concept of what you're try to say in plain English. It'll make your point sound far more convincing than throwing in random legal jargon.

One similar to Mrs Steptoe's above is the tabloid tendency to refer to thesps, singers etc. by their latest work, even when it isn't necessarily their best or most memorable.

You know, like calling Prince "the 'Cinnamon Girl' hitmaker", when hardly anyone bought that and most of us think of him more as the "Purple Rain" or "1999" singer.

Or referring to actors by their latest flop film: "Brad Pitt [blah blah blah].... the 'World War Z' actor said...." Aaagh!

"I'm good" in answer to "How are you?"
Holibobs for holidays
Brang as the past tense of bring
Starting a story with the word "So".

Would "horsing" be a better alternative to horse riding OP? I was explaining something to a friend once and he suddenly came out with "i have been horsing before you know!"

Maybe the two of you could start a trend

My hated saying of the month is when people talk about the circles they move in. Just say your friends ffs! You do not spend all the time walking around in a circle do you?!

'What you have to remember is.....'
Said by Patronising Bastard.

And clearly I meant "trying to say..."

Facebook me.
Play date
Date night
One person I know says I fink it's more better, childish use of language is embarrassing
Lastly not exactly what op was asking but irritating anyway is when people read things wrong, for instance, the shop bedeck, I know someone who says bed-deck grrrr
Matalan became Mataland !

Meal ? I get it ...it's so annoying ..

Can't stand it when I hear people calling others bab or babe