If you could pay someone to carry & deliver your children for you, would you?

[Queeniethecorgi]

I read an article with Oona King's surrogate today where she stated that Oona told her that 'she felt lucky as she didn't have to be the one to push it out'.

I'm childfree, but have read on here what childbirth and pregnancy does to your body, even when it goes well-- and the long lasting effects of when it goes wrong.

I think the only biological benefit for women is a reduced risk of cancer from breastfeeding?

So if you could still have your children but not have had to carry & deliver them yourself, would you? And as we've already suspended disbelief once, let's say you could feed them breast milk as well.

I hate being pg, and hate hate hate labour and childbirth, but I would never have wanted to hand that over. For a little time the Dcs were all mine, inside me and only I was there for them and protecting them. DC3 was a very hiccupy foetus and is an appallingly hiccupy toddler and I used to find it funny lying in bed feeling him hiccup for ages.

it is really special growing an entire human being.

I love being pregnant. I wouldn't let anyone take that away from me.

I'd rather spend surrogacy monies on a babysitter an hour a day and gym membership. I'm struggling with tunmy issues after 2 babies in less than 3 years.

oona king was joking her baby is beautiful and I am sure she was very grateful for her surrogate, it is not like she couldnt get arsed to carry and have her baby ,

No way, I loved being pregnant. (minus the sickness at the start and uncomfortableness at the end)

Trust me there is no better feeling than the movements and kicks from the child growing inside you, it's amazing.

I really enjoyed giving birth too. DH at my side, lovely big warm pool, lots of gas and air (big bonus ) and just the experience of bringing a baby into this world is just.. indescribable.

I would do it for someone else! (not with my own eggs though)

Ismavapernow and others - just a reminder that there are many women who desperately want to be pregnant but can't. If I was one if them I'd be really upset to read this thread full of. "feeling the kicks is the best thing ever ".

I hated being pg but giving birth was the most incredible experience - both times.

I wouldn't give up having lived through that even if I could get back everything that pg cost me.

I hated being pregnant but loved giving birth.

No way!!!! Nothing can beat being kicked in the ribs by a little foot I feel very sorry for people who are unable to enjoy this magical experience!!

I had a hard pregnancy and a nightmare birth (emcs followed by further surgery to fix the extra damage the surgeon did to me) which I'm still recovering from nine months later, but I'd do it again in a heartbeat. The reward at the end of it all is just beyond compare.

I loved being pregnant and wouldn't have missed that for the world.

But giving birth, ouch, it was clear I hadn't got a high pain threshold after all.

In an ideal world, I would have carried them to the first contraction then swapped with someone for the birth, then had them passed back to me immediately afterwards.

I really didn't enjoy it, and I'm sad about that. I swore blind I'd never have another baby and my pregnancy was no where near as bad as other people's experiences. But I'd feel worse if I hadn't experienced it and would be fully prepared to go through it again to give my DS a sibling. I'm not looking forward to being pregnant and giving birth but being a mum started when I got pregnant and I'd feel like I'd missed some of DS's life if I hadn't carried him.

Saying that, if I didn't have the choice to carry a baby myself I'd certainly use a surrogate, but I don't think it's something we should have as a 'choice' if we don't need it.

No, but both my prenancies and births were very easy (3 hours and 1.5 hour labours) the only thing that bothered me was that when I was expecting DD the smell of coffee made me sick, even walking past starbucks set me off!

Nope, despite the multitude of pregnancy problems I had in my 3rd pregnancy, I wouldn't have swapped a moment of any of my pregnancies or birth experiences. Despite the huge pain and even bigger stitches every time, they were the best days of my life!

Nah don't be sill forty .... I'm thick skinned!

I do get the hump when people make uneducated comments about "the poor woman who has to give her baby up" - tad patronising toward my Masters Degree educated surrogate who actually had the idea of doing it for me (and not for actual cash but for real expenses as she is my lovely mate.)

I bloomed when I was pregnant. No sickness, no other problems. I loved every minute of them all. I'd go back and do it over and over again if I could.

Even the births weren't that bad. Just the first one was a bit horrid and I've got over that after 20+ years.

I would if the baby could be grown in a lab and decanted at full term. I don't mind being pregnant, but it's restrictive and I'm never going to get my pre pregnancy body back.

I had a lot of morning sickness and anxiety in both my pregnancies and a horrific labour and EMCS with my first (ELCS with the second). I only enjoyed the middle bit of pregnancy really.
However, when they move inside you, when you see the heartbeat on the scan, when they arrive in the world and you KNOW them already even though you have never seen their face it is magic and I would not have missed that for anything.
If I hadn't been able to have children naturally I would have adopted.

FamiliesShareGerms

Ismavapernow and others - just a reminder that there are many women who desperately want to be pregnant but can't. If I was one if them I'd be really upset to read this thread full of. "feeling the kicks is the best thing ever ".

If I was in that position I'd be upset and offended at someone posing a question about getting/paying another woman to carry and birth your children for you 'just because'.

Sorry but what I and others have said is a valid reply to the question posed. I am sure a woman in that position could appreciate that. Even if it does upset a little.

Yes, I was answering the question as posed also. I would hate to think my response caused pain, but my response as valid given the context.

Not wanting to be pregnant or give birth is pretty much the only reason I'm not a mother (where 'not wanting' = 'visceral, hysterical and panicky repulsion at the thought of carrying something like a baby inside me').

So yes, I'd do it.

No I wouldn't. I don't agree with surrogacy. I would adopt though.

Just joining in as my gorgeous little boy is also thanks to surrogacy....would I do it again..in a heartbeat....would I have preferred to have carried him myself..definitely......was it possible for me to carry him......not unless they figure a way to carry without a womb etc...bloody cancer did for that one...am I offended by women loving pregnancy and everything about it....not at all ...... :)

Oona King had massive fertility problems though - the op makes it sound like she just popped to Harrods and bought a baby because she CBA .

It was a joke, she had had years of failed IVF.

And I don't think the effects on your body are so extreme anyway.

Plus huge cost of surrogacy.

Would not pay anyone to do it!

Sorry if it's already been said but breastfeeding actually reduces the instances of cancers in women. Something like an 8% less chance I developing breast and ovarian cancer for every two years' worth of breast feeding.