If you're ill, stay at home! Ranty post

[Thatisall]

This will be the third xmas in a row that my dh and I have been ill. Magically dd has avoided most of our lurgi.

Last year it was my df who infected us, visiting on xmas eve in a right state saying he hadn't eaten and barely slept for three days, that the doc had been out to him, it was that bad.

We said "oh df, you should've stayed at home, we would have seen you when you're feeling better". To which he responded that he fancied getting out of the house.
Cue Christmas morning and both me and dh are soooooo poorly. I manage to make dinner but we hardly eat and then fall asleep while dd plays. We're ill for 4 days to the point where dd had to be looked after by relatives.

The year before it was my dsis bringing chicken pox into the house. I have no issue with chicken pox parties but maybe not at xmas and without prior warning. She just turned up and said, "guess what we've got the pox". DH gets shingles and dd got chicken pox for the second time.

This year dsis used my hairbrush on herself and her dc and then announced that she'd spotted a couple of headlice on them the day before! I have thick curly hair

About 10 days before Christmas we had friends visit unexpectedly, which was lovely. Then I got ill, really ill, I had the worst diarrhoea I've ever experienced. I couldn't work and had to cancel parties and planned visits. When said friends heard they said "oh yeah we've had that it's nasty, still not shifted it and we've had it for two weeks"....meaning they were ill when they came to our house! (I did think we'd gone through alot of loo roll!)
The worst part is that they went hospital visiting that week too!

Now thanks to the 'compromises to my immune system' I've picked up a second, very nasty infection.

I won't be able to take part in NYE celebrations with my family and I still haven't been able to even see all of them because I don't want them catching this awful bug. I've lost so much weight and now my hair is starting to fall out. Again...said friend said this happened to them too.

I'm not saying that you should stay in bed with every sniffle and I'm all for soldiering on, but there's a difference between that and being thoughtless.

Are you poorly?
Is it really horrid?
Do you think it might be contagious?

Yes?

Well don't go and pass it to your nearest and dearest then! Do the right thing and stay away until you're better!!

Grrrr.

Also agree on the bits thing. I have cut my hair short because if DD gets them and i get them from her it is a pain in the arse to break the cycle, as i seem to be allergic to the best treatments and my hair is so thick.

i would be raging if someone bought their kid round with bits knowingly.

I dislike very much the "if I am ill I don't get paid so I am going to come to work argument" on the basis that you are then knowingly putting other people in the same position!

I haven't been able to see ill family members when I have a cold as it would put them at risk. I don't know why people can't think about others.

YANBU, at all.

If you are ill you should always let the people you are going to see know, then they can decide.

Its not just lost pay if people take time off work its the redundancy risk too. A lot of employers look at attendance when cutting staff or when recruiting.

I'm not saying that going into work ill is right but we live in a world where we sometimes have to be selfish to survive.

And don't assume that just because someone is coughing and sneezing they are shedding germs.

Hope all you I'll people and those with ill little ones managed to enjoy new year a little bit?!

ill not I'll

www.nhs.uk/Livewell/coldsandflu/Pages/Coldcomfort.aspx

NHS recommend covering your mouth and nose when sneezing as it spreads germs

Dizzy loving the whole "bits" thing - don;t you dare come into my house with your bits, leave them at home!

I think we all know that?

I think most of us know but ProudAs isn't too sure as he/she made the following statement "And don't assume that just because someone is coughing and sneezing they are shedding germs"

Thing is when you move from a working environment run on the basis that staff are malingerers, to one that's actually civilised, a lot of people will keep dragging themselves into work hacking and spraying all over the place, because they've internalised some screwed up idea that staying at home on the sofa with a lemsip is Not Making An Effort. So even civilised offices tend to have to do a lot of "no, I really do think you should FUCK OFF HOME NOW YOU PLAGUE BRINGER and look after yourself, please".

Relative works in the opposite of a civilised workplace - a public sector environment where no sick days are allowed - they really do punish for a single sick day (and 99% of staff are "temp with a promise of perm" so any disciplinary is bye bye perm chances). As a result they spend months of the winter circulating bugs around the office. By the time the lurgy comes around again, far from building up immunity, they're all too ill and knackered to resist it.

Love Plague Bringer - that is the term I will use for people at my work who drag themselves into work when they should be at home. My work don't have a strict sickness absence policy

My work has a strict 'visible' sickness policy because of the nature of my work. I'm one of the little people but if there was any suspicion that I'd infection one of the 'big people' with Lurgi I have no doubt that I'd be out straight away!!

ProudAS is right on the redundancy issue. Given the prevailing climate in my company and the contract/financial constraints we're under my primary concern is keeping my own job.

YY to Public Sector.
We have targets to achieve re sick absence. 2 of my colleagues have been sacked in 2013 due to this. Not just for Monday morning itis but for signed off by GP proper illnesses.
Everyone comes in if they can physically drag themselves in. It's that or the boot.

I guess what comes round goes round all in senses, might be you or one of your close relatives one day who develop a life threatening condition for which one of these illnesses could literally end a life

Why does coughing/sneezing automatically mean germs LoveBargains - allergies etc weren't catching last time I checked.

As for dosing up on Lemsip it may not be ideal but I would imagine that if it prevents sneezing it prevents one major source of spreading.

if you are ill and you go into work knowing you are infectious to make sure you don't ruin your own sickness record you could end up making someone else ill who has already taken time off.

yes understand sometimes you have to be selfish but if you know you are infectious then I think it's too selfish.

I'm not saying that going into work with a cold is right but how many people could honestly risk their livelihood, home etc over it???

Going into work ill may affect a colleague's pay and job security. Staying home will certainly affect yours. And to top it off DP has been made redundant so not going in could mean being made homeless.

The thread is about people with contagious illnesses spreading it to others not people coming into work with allergies

Nobody is saying people with allergies spread germs

You obviously haven't lost anybody for this reason.

Might be just a cold to you, but could mean someone being on a ventilator or going into intensive care

Where do you draw the line though? I am immunocompromised, so I know more than most. If there is a cold going around, I'll probably catch it and end up with a chest infection. I cannot and do not expect people to take time off work even though their cold may be contagious. I can also guarantee that when people are off sick with stomach bugs, they are unlikely to stay at home until they are 48 hrs symptom free.

Lovebargains you said I didn't know what I was talking about when I said that sneezes didn't necessarily mean germs.

We were talking about contagious illnesses not allergies but yes you are correct, allergic coughing and sneezing does not spread germs

Lovebargains I have immune compromised relatives but they would not want someone to lose their job/home.

The problem lies with the system not with people desperately trying to provide for their family and keep a roof over their heads.

Maybe your relatives wouldn't, but what about those who cannot tell you like the babies in the special care baby unit? It is absolutely heartbreaking to see them and a simple cold/flu can be life threatening