To think a family can't live on this...

[verydoubtful]

40K? I've done the sums and it just doesn't work. I know it's relative and a lot of families make do with a lot less but I can't see how I can make it work. No car finance in sums and no debt. Just basic expenses.

PS have namechanged for this

I think the PP is saying £70k as a household income, i.e. £40k from the OP's dh job and the OP career changing into a job paying £30k. I have to say I don't think £30k would be that unreasonable for a professional role, or at least certainly to expect to be earning that within 5 years of a career change into a professional role.

How old is your dc? Your child needs to live in the uk for three years before university to avid paying eye watering international fees.

Yes i think 70k would be a more reasonable joint income for the OP.

40k for dh and 30k for the OP after retraining/changing careers etc. I don't think 30k is an unachievable income to aim for and start planning towards this change.

Welcome back to the uk, OP. I think you will find you are more than a little more comfortable on an income of 40k than an awful lot of posters on here, including me. Our family circumstances are remarkably similar to yours, however, we manage to do it on far less than half of what you are proposing that it will cost. If we had your income then i would consider myself extremely fortunate. Sorry.. I never get upset by much on here, but this thread has riled me intensely.

Yes I do have a car, but that is paid for by the business, so I guess that should be counted into my 18k.
But I am wrong. I just recalculated
I am on more than this, net income about £22k
Sorry that's a bad miscalculation, but happy to know I have more coming in than I thought!!!

my family live on £20k gross...

with £40k, we'd be very well off indeed!

oh and we live near London in the south east, so it's a relatively high cost of living around here

I think your budget looks quite realistic. You could live on less but you'd be scrimping here and there, and worrying about money. Do you want that?

Where are you moving from? I can see you said you're bringing a pooch. Depending where you're coming from that process can be long and complex.

I moved UK to US. You do need to look closely into things like shipping costs. Ours were $6000 which was about average to move a household.

I have name changed.

Our joint income is around £64k. After pensions, tax this is around £4k a month. We are not living a lavish lifestyle. We run one car which is 8 years old. We only eat out on special occasions, rarely buy take aways, bring packed lunch to work. I really do think it depends on your outgoings.

Monthly outgoings
Mortgage £960
Debt £800
Dc school dinners £50
Childcare £980
Travel £370 (travelcard and petrol)
Utility bills £250
TV lic and Sky £440
Mobiles 70
Landline 20
Car ins 40
Build/cont ins 30
Food shopping inc nappies £280
Allowance £50 each

440 a month for sky? That can't be right.

I think it also depends a bit on whether you and your partner are both British citizens and perhaps whether your children hold British passports, but you cant expect to straight away be entitled to any benefits without having paid any National Insurance contributions to the UK in your adult lives.

Have a look at this for more information: www.google.co.uk/search?q=returning+expats+and+benefits+uk&rlz=1C1SVEF_enGB451GB451&oq=returning+expats+and+benefits+uk&aqs=chrome..69i57j0.11191j0j8&sourceid=chrome&espv=210&es_sm=93&ie=UTF-8

You may not instantly be able to claim any child benefit, or child tax credits. It may be worth finding some information about your status upon your return.

Only 3 years away made it difficult for us, despite having worked for a uk company, paid taxes and NI in the uk while overseas, and also having previous history with insurance companies, still having our UK bank account, and owning a house in the uk.

But Betty - if you clear your debts that would be an extra £9600 per year. That could buy lots of treats/holidays or meals out

Its the debt from (usually leaner) earlier years that leaves a lot of people short on such seemingly good salaries I think.

OP you've had lots of great advice here.

I can add a voice as someone who did the move. It's very strange because some of the things abroad I found far more expensive - eg food but some things were much cheaper eg childcare and coffees/ meals out etc. but- I found that once I returned it was all relative. I don't tend to have coffee out or eat out as much because the lifestyle isn't the same. A coffee here in town is a full cup and you sit down for half hour. Unlike the cortados that were a mouthful but cheap and drank in 10 seconds! Therefore cost wise uk looks expensive but doubt I spend more iyswim?

I currently have plusnet phone and unlimited broadband which costs me £20 a month. You can get free view channels so don't necessarily need sky. But if you want sky you can get their basic package of unlimited broadband, phone and family channels for about £50 a month.

I don't think 600 a month is excessive on food, it depends what you buy. I could probably cut it down a bit by going to lidl for some stuff but I work and am very time poor.

Fruit and veg v expensive. Mine tbf is probably skewed by dh working from home all the time and eating the same as an average horse

Oh gosh, the pooch, OP didn't mention originally. Pets are expensive. Depending on size of animal I would think budget ? £30/month to feed & vaccinate it.

£44 for sky!

The girl Don't I know it! That is why outgoings have to be taken into account.

I dream of what we could do with an extra £800 per month. One day it will be cleared-cannot wait.

More than do able, we are in a similar situation, dh working, I'm at home so no childcare, we have 3 DC and one on the way, only run one car though. Our budget breaks down like so:

Total Income 2,398.67

Car - Insurance £65.00
Car - Petrol £216.67
Car - Tax/MOT £41.67
Debt £85.00
Approved Food £70.00
Birthdays/Christmas/Summer Trips £497.50
Grocery shop £439.33
Building, content, life insurance £30.00
Bank Fee £15.00
Gas & Electricity £115.00
Mortgage for a large 3 bed semi £440.00
Mobiles (for two contracts) £50.00
Sky £70.00
Water £45.00
TV £12.50
Council Tax £110.00

Total Outgoings £2,302.67

still nearly £100 left over a month, I tend to round up not down so always a little bit extra there too. Our birthday/Christmas/summer trips breaks down to 2k for xmas costs, 2k for summer trips (we go on days trips and camping weekends as our preference but could be one holiday instead I spose) and the rest for the 3 million peoples birthdays I have to buy for! Approved food is a website with highly discounted store cupboard stuff on, I use it to get all the pack lunch stuff in for the month - its great! nights out are about once a month or less, but down to no childcare rather than costs. I will probably start driving this year, I see no reason why we wont be able to get another car, a little bit of juggling but it wont be an issue. I budget £100 a week on grocery shop... but I don't spend that, there is always enough to cover things that come up like DS losing a school shoe the wally! I like the wiggle room :)

Do you not have any spending money though on a month-by-month basis?

Yep, could live on 40k a year, but would have to give up all my luxuries. You have to ask yourself if coming to the UK is worth it.

Wow Betty that's a massive amount on debt. You will feel like you have had a massive payrise once that is cleared.

Hi OP - reading this with interest as we moved overseas last year.

Out of interest, where ru moving from? Do you really need to move 'back'? As you've been away for so long, surely the new country is 'home' now?

I'd agree with PPs re costs - I'd estimate around £10,000 shipping costs (across the Atlantic for us, cargo ship, 6 weeks, contents of a 2 bed) and around the same again in terms of start up costs: £2000 first month's rent, £2000 security deposit, £2000 furniture, £2000 paperwork/visas etc, £2000 car deposit. You'll need access to savings or some other source of income to fund this alone.

Personally, we don't find the US (East Coast) any cheaper than the UK, but costs are distributed differently, so eg car/petrol cheaper but mobile contracts a lot more for a lot less. Again though, not sure where you're moving from so this may be irrelevant. You really need to break down what you need from what you want.

Having lived in London before here, £40,000 really isn't a lot given the cost of housing. It would be fine elsewhere in the country but anyone not having bought before 2008/Lehman collapse is likely to have a huge mortgage/rent.

It may also help you to come over to the Living Overseas thread where there are loads of people who've moved back and forth over the years so they may also have some good advice.