To think a family can't live on this...

[verydoubtful]

40K? I've done the sums and it just doesn't work. I know it's relative and a lot of families make do with a lot less but I can't see how I can make it work. No car finance in sums and no debt. Just basic expenses.

PS have namechanged for this

Sorry, forgot to add, that it will depend on where you lived obviously.

If you don't want to try student hairdresses then a mobile Hairdresses may be cheaper than a salon.

Have you checked out the Money Saving Expert Website. It has advice on everything to do with finances and its a really busy site.

How old are your kids? I find extra curricular activities can be very pricey compared with overseas.

OP you didn't cause offense IMO, I was frustrated over other posters on the thread. I was a bit bemused at some of your budget, but hey, different strokes and all that.

School uniforms, shoes
Clothes
Entertainment
Birthday parties
Holidays
Savings

With regard to those, can be done very cheap or very dear. I think a £30/budget per person per month for clothes (including uniform & shoes) is a good starting minimum (I know plenty of people get by on less, though). Very hard to give good figures for the others, though.

OP, I think you're terribly sensible to look closely at all this before moving back to the UK. Good for you.

OP, on the two vehicles point, depending on where you move to, you may find that public transport is good enough to not need two cars. I know if you've been used to having two cars this is an adjustment but like a few of us have said if you do want to come back to the UK it's worth looking at all options to see how doable this is.

While on that subject though, to give you an idea, when I first passed my test (so 0 years NCB) I had a two year old Citroen which cost me about £400 a year in insurance. Your costings on that might be quite a bit more than it turns out to be.

I and others mentioned this before but not sure if you caught it, but have you come to your figures based on one or two of you working? It will have implications on the take home amount obviously.

Why not rent a house within an easy cycle ride of where you work and axe your travel costs - try having no cars saving £380 per month.
Axe food bills to £300 per month incl packed lunches for school - saving £384 per month.
We have never had Sky and don't miss it at all - plenty of free channels on freeview! Saving £40.
Get a mobile hairdresser to come to your house for £50 every 2 months for all of you saving £60 per month.
Buy phones for cash with some of the money you had saved for cars. Saving £16
Total saving £870 per month. Spend this£10,440 per annum on 4 foreign holidays or whatever floats your boat.
OP will you be working or just DH?
How old are your kids?

You haven't caused offence :) I just think you're expecting quite a high standard of living given the wage. You do need to search around for bargains. I know you're just giving average figures though.

re Mobiles. DH & I both have phones from same company, offering free calls for mobiles from that company. I pay £5 a month for my mobile and never ever go over the allowances, as I generally text most others and use landline (with free calls) for everything else, except emergencies. You can get a very cheap contract or PAYG nowadays if you're not hung up on getting an iPhone or the like.

With a little bit of shopping around or just mealplanning, you could probably get your grocery budget I spend down to £300 with very little work. Try going down to store brands or basics/value brands for some things to see how you like them - a lot of them are just as good as the branded stuff. Saves money in a fairly painless way - or just frees up some grocery money for some little luxuries without hurting the budget.

tv - you can get a freeview box, they're not that expensive.

OP, I think it's great that you're looking around for better deals, etc. After all, why pay more than you need to?

Some of the other posters on here are being really patronising and thoughtless. Telling those of us who have suggestions about how to live more frugally, or that live on lower incomes that our lifestyles are depressing, etc., is very upsetting and tactless. Not to mention insulting. My life is not an aching void because I can't have highlights every month, strangely enough. I am not on to the Samaritans just because we can't go on holiday abroad. Nor is my house shabby, my cupboards bare, my food cheap, unheathy and unappetising, my lifestyle flat and dull, my child going without. You can have a perfectly happy life, and still have nice things if you plan, budget and spend nicely... and also get over ideas about having to have or do certain costly things.

Oh, and the problem with the gap between rich and poor? NOT the fault of the poorer end of the spectrum, FFS Making a good life out of less money is not ever so 'umbly accepting that it's right and proper that some toffs have so mich more than you do.

Spend, plan and budget wisely, not nicely, sorry.

Sorry but it is depressing that people seem to think someone on 40k is well off but at the same time suggest that person needs to budget carefully and economise on food, travel, sky etc.

OP - be careful re the cars, I know when DH moved back to the UK only 1 insurance company would accept his non-claims from Germany. It could be expensive.

For food costs, why not get your last few food shop reciepts from where you are now, have a look on Sainsburys or Tescos online and see what the comparable prices are. You might have to make different own brand choices, but it'll give you a better idea how much your current ways of eating would cost in the UK - while £100 or under a week is perfectly possible for a family of 4, it might require you to make big changes to your current diet, worth getting a feel for it.

If you are renting, I'd strongly recommend trying to get somewhere near to good public transport rather than doing completely rural, or renting close enough to your DH's work that he can ride in on a bike - if you can manage with one car it will make a huge difference.

For mobiles, do you own handsets already? I own my i-phone so my contract is £15 per month.

Moving house is such a faff, why do you want to move at all?

As so many have said already, it all depends where you live, how far you are from work and school, how many of you work and therefore whether you need to pay for childcare, etc etc

Also, your choice if lifestyle comes in to it. Our family of five live on half your named figure but we live very simply (careful food bargain buying, in season fruit n veg from local supplier, clippers for boys' and dh hair, no holidays, and so on) but that is just our choice. We have also lived very simply abroad and know that in the UK it is easier to live frugally, there are many more ways of saving money here if that is how you want to live.

Also bear in mind that if you rent a house, they are unlikely to be furnished. There will be a cooker, washing machine and dishwasher if you are lucky. There may be some built in wardrobes if you are lucky, and shelves.
But you might need to buy all the furniture from scratch in one go. When we returned to the UK and had to rent for a year, we spent nearly £2k on furniture alone, mostly Ikea. The biggest expense were the beds and mattresses....

You never really fully appreciate how expensive furniture really is, until you have to get everything in one go.

I've not had time to check up on those figures - I'll do when kids are asleep, but wanted to answer some of the questions above.

Initially I won't be working. I'd like to, but have only found jobs more than an hour away. What I do pays peanuts in the UK so I'd have to way up the pros and cons or find something else to do after we've arrived.

We're not planning on spending money on childcare at this point.

We own our mobiles so that's a good tip re cheaper contracts.

DontmindifIdo - can you let me have the name of that insurance company?

We'll be shipping our furniture and pooch.

How does the cost of shipping your furniture compare with buying new/ used in the UK?

Most of our furniture is second hand. We spend £70 pw on groceries, incl nappies/detergent/toiletries. We buy our clothes from Primark & Sainsbury's .

The ds's & dh cut there hair at home (by dh). I get my hair trimmed once a year. It's v healthy, I gave up hair dye ages ago, I prefer my natural colour now.

We don't have Sky. Dumped them earlier this year & don't miss them one bit. We run one car. When we have family days out, we pack our own picnic. We are paying off manageable debt (car loan).

Rent is £600 pm for 3 bed semi. Our household income is £24k pa.

HTH

Car insurance quotes can be all over the place but it sounds like you're in the right ballpark. My car insurance last year was £480 with 0 years no claims (I'm 33)

We are also a family of 4 & income stated is after tax, btw.

If you do end up needing to buy furniture over here, check out British heart foundation if there's one near where you'll be living - they have specific furniture shops and are, IME, very reasonable.

On the hair care front, home colouring has come a long way in recent years and you can do a very realistic dye job at home now. Highlights can be nice but I find them a little dated and think most women look better without them.

Also I find Netflix a much better bargain than Sky.

Why do you want to come back to the UK? What are the positives?

very i see that you are probably not going to get a mobile with a contract, but do bear in mind if you do it can be very difficult to get one without a credit history here in the UK.

Will your dh's employer cover the shipping costs for your belongings? Mine covered shipping costs, gave £2k towards furnishings in addition and paid the deposit for rental. They paid solicitors fees, estate agents fees etc if we bought a house during the first 2 years of my employment too. I think many larger employers offer packages like this when people are making international moves. It made a huge difference because I don't think we could have afforded to fund the move ourselves. It would be worth trying to negotiate this with his employer. Some employers will also help spouses trying to find work in the area too.

Also, if your dh has an employers pension currently, check that this can be moved to your new employer. Mine could not when we moved (well, it could, but it would have been a bureaucratic nightmare), so when (or should that be if?) I retire I will have to claim part of my pension in the UK and part from my previous employer abroad.

Don't forget if you are moving pooch, pet insurance would be a good idea. Ours costs £10/month for one of our dogs (young, very healthy breed) and £25/month for the other (elderly, number of health problems).