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AIBU?

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STDs

52 replies

tooworriedforwords · 21/12/2013 17:16

Dp and I were watching hollyoaks (for those who aren't familiar there is a storyline about a woman who hadn't been sti tested and has gone a number of years with untreated chlamydia)
I said she was stupid and ofcourse if your sexually active you get tested. Dp then says he's never been tested..
Im gobsmacked and skslightly concerned. We've been together years and have two children.
Iv never been sti tested whilst with him. I have no symptoms but I'm a little worried and unsettled by this. What if Iv got it and Iv had it all these years and Iv given birth and everything!
P.s I'm abit if a hypocondriact...

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BertieBowtiesAreCool · 21/12/2013 17:17

I think it's good advice but I don't think most people do get tested unless they have symptoms. The only time I've ever been tested is when I was pregnant and they do the blood tests for whatever.

YoureBeingASillyBilly · 21/12/2013 17:18

Both need to get tested then.

soverylucky · 21/12/2013 17:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sammi1986 · 21/12/2013 17:20

I was first tested after I found out my ex had been cheating. Had two partners since and insisted both got tested before sex, even though my DP is the only one I haven't used condons with. Paranoid much....

tooworriedforwords · 21/12/2013 17:21

I'm all worried now. I know they test for hiv, syphillis and hepatitis but I don't think they do for anything else..iI feel vile at the thought!

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tooworriedforwords · 21/12/2013 17:23

Iv always been tested with previous partners but didn't with Dh (don't ask why as I honestly couldnt give you an answer) I was a lot younger when I had previous relations.

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BohemianGirl · 21/12/2013 17:23

I've never been tested, neither has DH. I don't know anyone who has TBH.

Sammi1986 · 21/12/2013 17:24

Most GP surgeries do anonymous testing, there will be a box with DIY testing packs in the ladies toilets.

tooworriedforwords · 21/12/2013 17:25

Does that not worry you? I had always assumed people got tested if they had any unsafe sex.. I always did (and wasn't unsafe with Dd for a long time as I couldnt use pills at the time) sorry for TMI

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tooworriedforwords · 21/12/2013 17:26

God I sound like a right one! I assure you it's not as bad as I sound haha

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BohemianGirl · 21/12/2013 17:27

I'm sure I had lots of tests when pregnant.

It certainly wasn't the done thing when I was foot loose and fancy free to have sex without a condom - I am of the endless HIV adverts era - no one my age would have unprotected sex. Well, not unless they are very dim

Kafri · 21/12/2013 17:27

I was tested routinely as part of my ivf treatment but other than that I've only been tested once and that was after an ex turned out to be not so nice and also why he's an ex!

tooworriedforwords · 21/12/2013 17:30

Would I be unreasonable to make Dh take a test (I obviously will be)

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NoArmaniNoPunani · 21/12/2013 17:33

Why didn't you discuss this when you stopped using condoms?

BohemianGirl · 21/12/2013 17:34

If you've children since meeting him, anything will have shown up during your pregnancy tests.

Actually we've both had an HIV test - had to as part of our life insurance back in the 90's.

tooworriedforwords · 21/12/2013 17:34

I have no idea!

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HaleyDunphy · 21/12/2013 17:35

Both me and DH got tested at the beginning of our relationship and I have been tested since, just as part of blood tests done at the docs.

Don't feel scared, just go and get them done - both of you! Don't feel embarrassed either. My GP is very liberal and insists I get tested even though I'm married...

tooworriedforwords · 21/12/2013 17:35

I think we will be off to the clinic on Monday. Dh will not be pleased!

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eurochick · 21/12/2013 17:37

I used to get checked out one a year or so when I was single/ in short term relationships. I thought that was pretty normal. I know plenty of people who did it. And I've been checked recently as part of IVF.

YoureBeingASillyBilly · 21/12/2013 17:38

No not unreasonable to ask as it affects your health. Just like you would expect him to have a driving license before you would get in a car with him.

BertieBowtiesAreCool · 21/12/2013 17:39

I don't know, since I had DS then I've only ever had sex with a condom or in a relationship which I'm 99.99999% sure was committed (with only the tiny % because of course you can never 100% know).

I don't even know what's involved in an STD test but I have a feeling that it's uncomfortable and embarrassing so I've never really wanted to have one - if they were presented as more of a normal screening check, maybe more people would take them up.

I probably did have unsafe sex sometimes when younger and didn't get tested then Blush also had oral sex with people without a condom/dental dam because WHY would you use one, but I think it's fairly unlikely to catch anything from that.

HaleyDunphy · 21/12/2013 17:47

Please don't be embarrassed - GPs see ALL sorts everyday. Go to a sexual health clinic and they don't bat and eyelid either.

A chlamydia (sp?!) test can be done yourself for example. It's not bad at all, simple swab, no pain!

catgirl1976 · 21/12/2013 17:49

Did they not test you when you were pg?

I'm sure they tested me for loads of things

tooworriedforwords · 21/12/2013 17:51

What about poor dcs if Iv hadanything all these years! I could have passed something on at birth. (I googled it[hangs head in shame of Dr Google])

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tooworriedforwords · 21/12/2013 18:14

Just spoken to Dh, were both off to the clinic asap... Better safe than sorry ?

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