Buggies must be folded by law, if a wheelchair user wishes to board

[BerniceBroadside]

I know this can be a hot topic so thought I'd share that stagecoach have new signs on their buses stating that buggies must be folded by law if a wheelchair user wishes to board. Let's hope it's actually enforced.

I've not seen 600+ replies to such threads. I posted one myself and got about 8 replies.

I don't know, the 'panto' thread went to the bitter end, and in part led to the This Is My Child campaign.

I have seen a lot of threads about behaviour in cafes and other public places, where hidden disabilities have been talked about. (and have usually ended up getting quite heated)

Right. I've had an email from MNHQ threatening suspension over my post that others have quoted. Apparently there were numerous complaints.

Congratulations to the buggy mafia, MNHQ officially sanction your line that your babies in buggies are more important than mine in wheelchairs. I hope you have a lovely fuzzy glow about that.

You see, I've got confrontational. In over five years of posting I've tried to reason with and educate people who have said the most disgusting things about my children and my friends' children, yet their posts have been allowed to remain as it is 'debate'. I'm not allowed to fight back, I'm supposed to sit here passively and ineffectually posting my objections.

So it has been allowed to be said that my children and children like them are a drain on society and a nuisance spoiling other families' enjoyment, but that's 'debate' so it's ok. On this thread even families like mine have been called entitled for wishing to use spaces enshrined in law for our use after disability campaigners fought for over 35 years to get them.

I know many people believe that families like mine are entitled as we get 'free cars', we're 'paid to stay at home looking after our children' we 'queue jump at theme parks' we 'get special parking spaces' our 'loos don't get queues and oh look lots of space for a pram'.

You know, babyhood is such a short time. Disability is for life.

They'll be out of their buggies and using the toilet in no time. You won't be pushing them around and doing continence care when they're 8 (with no end in sight).

They can go to theme parks and enjoy the day - without serious planning and modification my kids won't ever be able to do that.

You can send them to school and in the majority of cases know they will get an adequate education - not have to have endless fights with the local authority as giving them an appropriate education may cost a bit more and actually they don't think it's worth it - trying to consign them to the scrap heap. Then there's the parents believing that the TA specifically allocated for your child should be for the use of the entire class even though without them your child cannot access the curriculum at all.

You won't get your car criminally damaged because someone objects to you using a blue badge space (with a badge).

You won't be continually derided in the media for being scroungers. Sniped at on message boards for your flat screen tvs.

You have the option of using normal childcare. SN childcare (if it exists, in my area it doesn't) is double the cost. The reason I had mine all close together was so I could get back to work quickly. But it didn't work out like that, it worked out that I had 3 children never leave toddlerhood. They were all here before we realised there were problems. Never mind all the appointments I'd have to take time off for. I'm effectively unemployable.

You'll even be able to sleep for a whole night once they get to a certain age. We can't.

You know my respite carer (which we have to pay for, the local authority won't) came this morning and I spent a full half hour chatting to her out of our four hours because apart from DH I've not spoken to another adult this week. I'm socially isolated and there are people on here who want me gone so they don't have to see the reality of the situation. I've made friends on here which is why I stick it out through the vileness. I can't really attend social events unless it's one carer per child and even then it's horribly stressful.

I have been suicidal over some things said here. In combination with everything going on in my life these are not just 'words on a screen'. Please don't ask me to 'step back' as I'll feel even more isolated and cut off from the very real friends I have online.

I honestly believe that anyone here having had things said to them about their children and family would also feel the fury and need to defend them as I do, if I don't respond then I'm letting my children down and I think some people on here know that and just love getting the reaction.

But as long as mothers of young children aren't inconvenienced once in a blue moon by people who are repeatedly inconvenienced several times a day just for being born that way then all is ok in the Mumsnet world.

Seriously, do people actually think that the space that is only on buses anyway to cater for wheelchair users is for buggies/prams?? No, it is not, u are allowed to use it when it is NOT REQUIRED by a wheelchair user and if it is then u need to vacate that space.

It wasn't that long ago when u couldn't even get on a bus with a buggy or pram, u would have to fold down if u wanted to access a bus as they had steps etc, so why the big fuss now if u need to fold down??

The space was only installed to make buses accessible for wheelchair users. Anyone with a buggy or pram who thinks "first come first served" are disgracefully selfish, they wheelchair user has no other way to get around, u do.

Stagecoach has put the signs up because of selfish mummies that refuse to move when it is required.

Oh and a generic 'get fucked' isn't a personal attack, by the way. I'm still trying to work out why other people can call corporations 'cunting' and say certain groups can fuck off yet I'm threatened with suspension?

Bit strange, that.

Gobby :(

I can't say I read anything in your posts that seemed out of order, infact I think you and others in your situation managed to remain very calm given the shit that was coming from some posters trying to justify their selfish actions.

Im not going to begin to suggest I know how you feel, but the emotion in your post gives just an indicator as to how tough life is for you. I hope your post makes people think twice before they do something which makes the life of a family who already struggle even harder than it already is.

I hope you and your family have a lovely christmas.

Gobby, I'm upset that MNHQ have had a go at you. I think parents and carers like you are wonderful. People should try walking mile in your shoes before they dare to criticise.

Apparently it was the generic 'get fucked' that was the issue, although others are of course allowed to use generic insults.

Cunting Sainsburys, anyone?

Well said, Gobbysadcase, I agree with everything u have said.

People need to start thanking their lucky stars that they are not in the situation of having children with disabilities. Everyday is a struggle and is not helped by the selfishness of other people.

Oh, and I now have no more respite until the new year. So if I don't email saying I'll be a good girl then I'm going to have nothing over the festive season. Cheers for that.

Gobby I don't think you insulted anyone in particular and I'm sorry you've been warned. Just don't get how people could have read your posts and complain rather than think it's hardly surprising you were angry given some of the crap spouted in here. I despair. I'm sorry I can't do anything more practical.

I got utterly desperate a while back and posted asking for a kicking. I didn't get it, I got an outpouring of loveliness that I will never, ever forget. It really helped me in a dark place.

It really is a minority here, the libertarians who say I should be in the gutter and those here calling me entitled who cause problems, but am I really not permitted to defend my family?

What's wrong with telling people to get fucked when they're posting bollocks like "I'm not moving because I was here first" or referring to those with disabilities as "entitled" for wanting to use a facility designed for them?

If the worst transport-related thing that happens to someone is that an anonymous poster tells them and others to get fucked, then they're doing pretty well for themselves.

It seems as though the chronically selfish not only block access to disabled facilities, but are also protected from censure, while those who are the target of their selfishness and discrimination have to put up with that, and are also banned from getting angry about it.

I've seen worse things than "get fucked" allowed to stand on MN. And it was a generic comment - not aimed at any specific poster - therefore it should only upset those who know perfectly well they are behaving in the way Gobby was attacking. And a bit of upset might make them think harder about their behaviour.

Gobby

I have invisible disabilities and while they might make it hard for me to fold and sit elsewhere it's not impossible a wheelchair user doesn't have that option. I will always move.

I have been suicidal over some things said here. In combination with everything going on in my life these are not just 'words on a screen'. Please don't ask me to 'step back' as I'll feel even more isolated and cut off from the very real friends I have online

Gobbysadcase, I cant tell you how sorry I am to read your post. I have no experience of permanent disability. Although when I did have a temporary disability which caused me exhaustion & anxiety for about 18 months, I gained a sliver of an insight into what a permanent disability might be like, and believe me, I encountered several entitled mummies who would not let me sit in the access area in the bus even though I was visibly [temporarily] disabled.

I know you say that this MB is a lifeline, but it's a tough place, an internet messageboard, so I hope you can occasionally do the virtual equivalent of sticking your fingers in your ears, going "la la la la" at all the ignorant feckers, and sing to yourself "It's only a messageboard"

Best wishes to you & your family from a stranger on the internet.

Gobby, I don't understand why anyone reported your post in the first place. Some people are selfish entitled twats.