To want to take a photo or two of my daughters in their nativity?

[BabylonReturns]

Just that really.

Text from school this morning to say photos and videos are banned.

Really annoyed as is dd2s first school nativity, and I've recorded the last 4 with dd1 in, no problem.

I think it's a shame, but also think school plays can be ruined by the number of people in the audience taking pictures / filming.

Surely it's nicer for the children to see their parents watching the play, rather than a load of cameras / videos

I really hope so, clam - it is horrible to think that anyone could say that and mean it. It didn't look like a joke to me, though.

A friend of mine posted a picture of her son's nativity on FB. You could hardly see any of the children though, for all the iphones waving in front of their faces.

I don't think that schools should have a blanket ban on photos/video.

At dd's school they ask parents at the beginnning of each year to let them know if they are not happy for their children to be in photos/videos. As no one has (yet) objected, we're allowed to take photos/videos (we are warned that they are for personal use only and shouldn't put them on the web). This seems like a good policy.

I really hope random was joking but this is a serious issue for some children. I don't think random was joking though because the last line about zooming in and not taking photos of other children sounded like it had been thought through.

My son when 5 walked down the aisle shouting 'take my photo now mum NOW' then stopped (all behind bumped into him) he wouldn't walk until I took his photo, I was mortified!

DNiece had her nativity on Friday. Last year they had a 'no photo's or video' policy (at least two children for whom it would be a problem) and the school received so many complaints about it that they kept the policy but hired a photographer, then made all the parents sign a form to say whether or not their children were allowed to appear. Those that weren't had their faces blurred/pixelated out after the fact and the school are going to sell the pics and video.

DSis is now under pressure from her DC's to buy some of the pictures from school, even though she's already taken a few pictures of them in their costumes before hand at home. The DC's don't understand why they can't have the picture of them on stage when their friends are getting them. It would have been so much easier if the school had just stuck to their guns

Well ours can't be the only local paper that publishes photos of all the school nativities every year. I know there was a photographer at ds's as I saw him and I got an email last night telling me the pics would be in the paper tomorrow. Surely that's more likely to be seen by some random person than a private facebook page.

Disclaimer: I'm not on facebook but I'm led to believe you are supposed to be invited to see someone's page?
Not that I'm condoning it at all, Facebook and some of the idiots who use it have a lot to answer for, not least spoiling the fun for others in just this way. I do agree that it's better to just enjoy the moment rather than watching through a screen but for those who do want a few pictures as a memento, or perhaps some video to show an absent parent, it's a shame it has to be overshadowed by the sinister threat of what could happen. Nothing is innocent anymore .

I'm still glad ds's school shows a little trust in us though!

Pixel- if a photographer from a local paper came, then any children who did not have permission to be photographed would be removed before the photo was taken. Like a PP's school, we have agreements in place that detail what photos can be taken and where they can be used.

For example, parents can agree to photos that are only used in the school premises, photos on the school website (which are group shots with no names) or photos to be used in the paper or externally somewhere.

I disagree. photos should be allowed. I have no problem with the 'no facebook rule'.
If a child is in danger, then that child steps to the side, at the end, when all the parents take a group photo. Then that child's safety is not compromised and all the other children and parents are not restricted in any way.
Easy.

This is a nightmare for schools every year. We take photo's of the children and sell them 50p a copy. We have a lot of children in care, vulnerable, moved to places of safety etc and it is really, really important that their pictures aren't bandied about other people's Facebook, families for all and sundry to see.
I understand that parents want a photo of their children, but NOT at the cost of another child's or family's safety. How did we become so selfish?
We had a tosser of a parent who filmed at the back, was asked twice to stop and then threateningly said "You won't want me to make a fuss will you?" The trouble is, he would have made an awful scene and totally ruined the experience for everyone. He was zoomed in on his child ( who by the way, isn't allowed to have his photo in any newspapers or on our website ), but that's hardly the point. I have no idea how the Head will deal with it, but personally I'd ban him from any future plays or group performance things.

As I said earlier, the no Facebook rule doesn't always work as parents disregard it.

And Lara- you don't know why his child wasn't allowed a photo on the website. As mentioned earlier, it may be because of an abusive parent for example. If dad has taken the photo himself, he can take the necessary steps to prevent it falling into the wrong hands. Ie keep the photo to himself and not post it on Facebook.

This comes up every year.
My children are adopted and have birth family living very close.
They are very vulnerable children.
This is one of the reasons that school may say no to photographs. But if people think it is more important to have a fuzzy photo of their little darling, than of my children actually being snatched from school because a member of the family have recognised them, I find that a very selfish attitude.
Yes, let's just ostracise the child even more by saying, hey, Fred you are not allowed to be photographed! Imagine the questions that child would have to answer.

Those of you who know that parents have put photos on facebook when the school have specifically asked them not to should report those parents to the school. It's really not good enough to shrug shoulders.

We are allowed to take photos as long as we don't put them on social networking sites. I'm glad to say that everyone I know on fb respects that rule. It's incredibly selfish not to

We had our nativity last night, and as is usual at our school no photos can be taken. The HT stood up at the start and said several parents had asked for no photos to be taken "for good reason". It means everyone gets to see the performance without flashes going off, or people bobbing up and down, or a sea of cameras.

Photos of the children individually and in groups were available to order for 50p each.

One of my FB friends had posted photos of their nativity. Another friend commented that it was unusual to be able to do this and her response was it was her child and for her personal use. A group shot, on FB

Moomoo is overreacting.
No one said we wanted a child snatched.
Our school, if you don't want your child photographed, sign a form to say so.
And yes, I suppose you will have to tell the child, at some point why.

But why should the other 29, out of 30 children be stopped.
They had form photos at the end of the year in my school. They still do in ds's school.

It is only the media bit - the facebook and the newspaper bit that you are complaining about presumably?

Tbf, random essentially said that Oblomov (although, what ever other posters believe, I think it may have meant to be sarcastic. Didn't get the tone right.)

Sorry? I don't understand. What tone?

If your first post was genuine Oblomov, then I think it's really pretty horrible of you to feel that your rights for a photo of little johnny in his wonky crown trumps the right of a child to sleep safely at night

The reason I didn't report the photo on Facebook was because I had absolutely no idea who it was and where they were from! It popped up on my news feed because one of my friends 'liked' it. That's how easy it is for a photo to spread round people on Facebook! I am not friends with the woman who put up the photo.

I just presumed that their school had either a no photos or a no photos on Facebook policy as I can't imagine a school not having one these days.

Before MN I assumed this was "peeeeedo hysteria" and thought it was a totally stupid rule

Now I understand that it may be to protect vulnerable children from an abusive family member or other child protection issue

Now that I understand that I am fine with it. (Although of course it is sad)

I'm rather grateful to MN for educating me on that one

Oh- and I forgot, I did come across a photo of our school play on FB, but seeing as it was around 3 years old when I came across it, I didn't think it worthwhile.

What message does that send to the child who is unable to have his photo taken, how much more of his/her self esteem going to be damaged over a photo/video.

When will Adults stop and think what is best for a child, who may have had a lot to deal with in such a short life and then felt wonderful to do a play only to feel left out when it's time for photos.