To think that if you can't control your children, you shouldn't come to hotels?

[HomeIsWhereTheGinIs]

DH and I are currently staying at a very nice boutique hotel in the countryside. It's been a hell of a busy year and so the idea was to treat ourselves to a couple of days somewhere luxurious and to do lots of reading and sleeping. However, we're staying at a place that's converted old outbuildings into suites, two suites to a building. And the family next door have the two noisiest children on the face of the planet.

Yesterday morning we were working up by the children shrieking to one another and then for their mother (it appeared she'd pushed them out into the communal stairwell to play). A phone complaint later to reception and the noise ceased (and they glared at us every time they passed us in the hotel). But damage done, we were already awake (and given that I am exhausted all the time from this pregnancy, it was awful not being able to go back to sleep). Yesterday evening, exactly the same thing. Screaming children sent to "play" on the stairs and landing outside our room where they screamed, ran around and then got into an actual fight (complete with shouted insults and wails for a parent). It happened again this morning at 7am (there goes our lie-in) and this time the call to reception had no effect.

I'm really cross that I haven't been able to have a lie-in because of their lazy parenting. I remember going to hotels with my family when I was small and my mother coming down on me very hard when I was too loud and in danger of disturbing the other guests. They're the only children at the hotel and their running and screaming in the library yesterday was attracting frowns from every other couple there. AIBU to hate the parents of the noisy brats for being so selfish and entitled? My feeling is that when you have kids, you don't get to just ignore behaviour that might be ruining an experience for other people.

Loveolives - the parents put their children into the corridor outside the OP's room, early in the morning, to play noisily - not once, but twice. They did not get up with their own children or attempt to amuse them quietly in any way - how is that not lazy parenting?

I'm overjoyed when I hear someone else's kids - just relieved it's not mine!

How do you know it's lazy parenting? I'm assuming you're not a parent. Best of luck when you are though, it's a real eye opener. Yabu

I really think you should read the thread. All of it.

Actually in all fairness I do think that the hotel did what they could. It's not their fault and they did ask the parents to deal with their offspring and to bring them back inside the room. Sadly the place was fully booked so we couldn't be moved. And as they're the only children here I don't think the hotel has to deal with this sort of thing very often. I'm not sure it'd be fair to give them a bad rating on trip advisor when they'd done what they could. I actually love this hotel and other than the fact that we both (including my non-pregnant dh, for the benefit of those that said other people were just being kind because I'm carrying a fetus) wanted to sleep in, it's been lovely. It was just such a shame. We're so tired and have been looking forward to this treat for ages. Shame that part of it was spoiled by selfish people.

I also now have a slight crush on Pagwatch. "Chocolate chippyfucker" made me grin!

Chunderella I think we'll have to leave it there don't you? You don't seem to have grasped what I meant by my original post or anything I've said subsequently. Please don't take it personally. (And I'm confused about the SEN comment but you seem to be getting quite upset so I suggest we just drop it?).

Charley barley: given that they glared at us when they saw us in the breakfast room yesterday, it's quite possible you're right. They seemed genuinely cross that we'd complained.

We all grasped what you meant in your original post.

I hope you glared back!
Did the hotel offer you a reduction in your bill?

More to the point we all agreed with you that the parents shouldn't have booted them out per se.

saintlyjimjams me too! . As are 98% of the Parenting Population.

I have a large family so we are generally noisier than most simply due to numbers and I would be FUMING if my kids behaved like that in a hotel. I dont expect perfection but I do expect them to behave in a way that doesnt disturb other people. I would be absolutely mortified if someone complained about us and would be apologising not glaring!

All the accusations that the OP will find out what its like when she has her baby seems to be excuse making from other lazy parents! If you cant stop your child disturbing others then sodding well stay at home!

YANBU. This is precisely the reason why we don't stay in hotels with the children. They aren't particularly naughty, but they do rise early and make a fair amount of noise. It's just not on to inflict that on other guests.

This family should be getting up with their kids and taking them out, not letting them run about the hotel disturbing other guests. It's crap (I know from the couple of times I've had to do it for weddings), but it's part of being a parent. I've been out in the hotel gardens at 6am before (away from the hotel) to entertain mine and not back before breakfast is available. Not my idea of a relaxing time, but it's necessary.

I would have complained to the hotel staff OP.

I'd be annoyed too.
Noise coming from the next room, understandable if annoying.
Noise coming from stairwell and corridor, not acceptable.

I'd email the hotel. Say that you complained twice about the 7am noise, that it spoilt your long awaited and needed break before the birth of your baby, and ask for them to recompense you for the spoilt weekend.

Don't let it go.

I think the OP has explained herself well.

YAstillNBU

With this new nickname, I don't even really need to type any more - I can just direct Chunder to my name.

I have a child with SN, as does Pag.

Honestly - there are many threads that I would query if SN were potentially an issue. This isn't one of them.

Oh and anyway this thread wasn't about tantrums.

Chunder What you say about SEN is true however, there is no evidence to suggest that these children did have SEN. There was no meltdown, just kids screaming and shouting at each other with no parental control. Also, if the kids did have SEN the presumably the parents would take greater care to keep them safe and not boot them out into a corridor alone? Also, the "meltdown" would have continued after they were returned to their room and it didnt.

And if they did by some chance have issues, well lazy and neglectful parenting is not confined to parents of children without SEN.

When I go to hotels it's usually adults talking loudly in the hallway, adults flushing toilets or showering in early morning, adults stumbling in drunk, adults closing their doors loudly -- that prevent me from lie-ins.

I once had a holiday ruined by other peoples children. There was a sign next to the gorgeous infinity pool looking over the Med on Lindos Bay saying 'STRICTLY NO CHILDREN IN THIS POOL' followed by directions to the other general pool and childrens pool. The pool had no shallow bit so probably H&S issue too, partly as well as to preserve it for a quiet pool for the grown ups.
Though the sign was in English the only people that didn't seem to understand it were two British families . Incidentally we had deliberately picked the fortnight after the (British) schools had gone back after summer hols. We both have grown up children now , so done that bought the Tshirt etc. and so deliberately picked dates likely to be many less children/quieter . Though l appreciate the school hols more expensive argument blah blah, whole other thread.

First morning there l went for an early swim when the pool opened at 8am and was just bobbing around looking out over the sea in the sunshine and thinking l had died and gone to heaven. Bliss.

Next minute 'SPLASH' as out comes Mr and Mrs Rulesdontapplytous with their two sons aged around 5 and 8 who decided their morning entertainment would be to firebomb the pool repeatedly and drench yours truly all over her face and hair (I hate getting water over my head - whole other thread again) and laughing hysterically at my futile efforts to evade and following me round edge of the pool in order to jump in as near as possible to me every time.

I got out after shouting a few 'Oi's at the children which were ignored by parents and then getting out and politely pointing parents to large sign , which was greeted with loads of abuse 'wind your neck in' and 'our chalet is on this level so why should we go down the steps to other pools just because of a madam like you' etc etc. I then reported this to a passing member of staff (who hadn't reacted to the children in the 'NO CHILDREN' pool) who said l needed to speak to the manager. The manager wasn't there and none of the staff were willing to challenge this couple so they carried on.

I did continually harass them though and 'reminded' them at two minute intervals that the pool was 'NO CHILDREN' I refused to be intimidated by them or worse still leave them to enjoy the run of the pool ! The next few days they possibly thought better of it (and were 'sighted' in the other pools) but then resumed using infinity pool again. Luckily it worked out l didn't clash with them again.

Karma ? Dad slipped and broke his arm on last day of their week on the tiles on the outer border of the pool (beyond the drainage bit) which were drenched by his sons firebombing activities.

and if there is a God they will have had no holiday insurance

All the accusations that the OP will find out what its like when she has her baby seems to be excuse making from other lazy parents! If you cant stop your child disturbing others then sodding well stay at home!

^^ This, 100%.

Stop trying to defend the undefendable. (Looks at Chunder......)

Yeh. Stay at home and shove them in the corner of the mansion with the governess . Its 2013 not 1913.

What do you mean misspixie?

Ooh there's a thought now that mine are grown up 'children should be seen but not heard'.

Ooh am with you op. not as bad but we went to a gorgeous cafe at the weekend my with our and my sisters dc ranging between 3 and 7. At the next table were 2 mothers with similar age kids who chatted to each other as their horrors rampaged around the cafe particularly targeting a child free couple trying to have a conversation. Shrieking fighting pushing while their pathetic mothers ignored them. All our kids sat and coloured and when they got restless we left. Hate it when people either aren't aware or don't care how their kids behaviour impacts on innocent bystanders.

The whole "if you can't control your children then sodding well stay at home!" Debacle. Isn't that what parenting is about? Learning to control your kids? teach them right from wrong etc? Believe me there are MANY times I would rather stay at home like many other mums but sometimes shit happens and things need doing. No one on this thread has told this OP that she was unreasonable for thinking the parents shouldn't have booted the kids into a communal stairway/hallway. No one.