To think that a mother shouldn't threaten to 'Drop Kick' their child on Facebook?

[JudgyOldBag]

A friend of mine has just posted the following status on her Facebook:

"Just about to drop kick DS as he is behaving so badly"

DS is 6. He found out a couple of weeks ago that his parents are splitting up and he's having to move house soon when his mother leaves his father.

AIBU to think that this child needs love and support rather than have his mother joke about threatening physical violence towards him on Facebook? Or am I just being judgey and should take the joke as it was meant?

So it was meant to be a joke? Not one I would find funny.

Well presumably her kid won't read her comment! She is probably giving him lots of love and support but just needs somewhere to vent, fb can be ok for that sometimes.

Yes, you are being judgey, am sure she was only joking!

Take it as an outlet for stress allowing mum to then show her ds the love and support he needs.

I don't find it funny either. But she could be venting the only way she knows how.

I would imagine she's just venting on Facebook.

YANBU. Whether she means it or not (and I would guess not, surely someone who actually wanted to do it wouldn't post it on FB) its a horrible thing to think about your child.

Mine frequently annoy me but I would never even think that about them.

Reminds me at DS's weekly activity a couple of months ago, a girl (must be about year 5ish) kept coming over to her mum instead of doing the activity. The mum told her that she would "kick her ass onto that mat if she didn't go away" Charming.

at crapbag and YANBU judgy

What vile, disgusting mothers.

She's venting. It is unlikely she will dropkick her child.

I know for a fact that my mother occasionally fantasised about inflicting violence on us. Didn't mean she actually did.

Yes, you are being incredibly judgemental.

Find a hobby.

YANBU. I am sure she doesn't mean it and is only letting off steam, but I know my 6 year old likes to read Facebook over my shoulder, and it would be horrible for a child to see that comment!

Bad taste IMO - horrible thing to say joking or otherwise.

Miaow
must replenish supply of duct tape

I'm sure she was joking (she would never physically harm her DCs), and yes she was just using it as a vent.

However, she talks like this in front of them as well. She doesn't threaten them, as in CrapBag's example above - but she will say things within their earshot such as "He's a horrible little boy" (he's really not afaik) or "Go away you annoying little boy" and out of their earshot she will say "I've had enough of them they're doing my head in, horrible children"

I just find it sad that she feels the need to 'show off' to her friends, as if she thinks its cool and funny to say nasty things your children.

She was just venting, you are being incredibly judgey.

I remember my DM threating to strangle me many a time but she never did! as in 'if she screeches like that again I'm going to strangle her' . As I grew older I adopted the name of 'screaming scull' I was a loud child.

Say underneath:

Poor love, he must feel a bit unsettled with everything. Hope you're ok (hun) xx

See what she says.

If she agrees then she's just venting. If she says 'the fucking arsewipe is crying in his room just because I pushed him down the stairs' then call the police.

And Miaow I think the duct tape comment is funny. Makes me think of the little brother in Malcolm in the Middle who was taped to the back of the door....

Lighten up.

I suspect she's not perfect.

Like the rest of us.

Perhaps,if she's your friend she could do with your help rather than your condemnation?

OK I'm being judgey - just needed to gauge my judginess. I don't have DCs so it's difficult to know sometimes.

Yes I might make a comment to show her I'm there for her.

You aren't being judgy. I would judge someone who says things like that in earshot of their children. They are setting them up for a world of rejection. I have said things like "you are doing my head in" but I would never say that they are horrible, its a terrible thing to say.

Oh and in my example, the mother was annoyed because her conversation was being interrupted.

It just puts my teeth on edge whenever I hear any mother speak in a derogatory way to their DCs.

I do think that the DCs will feel rejected. And while it might be funny now, it won't be when they're sensitive teenagers. I had this done to me as a child - parents always made fun of me and it really affected my self esteem.

It's a JOKE! Presumably if they are splitting up then she is in a pretty crap place herself right now. Her tolerance levels are probably low. Venting on Facebook is something that has no impact on the child itself so can't really see the issue.
Speaking like that in front of them is a whole different ball game.

Well, if you have no DC you are being doubly U! I was a great parent before I had DS and thought I knew it all.

I love my DS more than anything in the world but after a whole day/night of hearing Mum can I have or Mum can you come here, or mum where is.......I may be guilty of muttering uncharitable thoughts under my breath. Doesn't make me a vile or disgusting mum though, it makes me human and honest!

I may be guilty of muttering uncharitable thoughts under my breath but would you say those uncharitable things outright to them? Tell them to bugger off because they were annoying for wanting to cuddle you? Or write them on Facebook for the world to see?

And I know I'm being judgy, but I haven't said anything to her, I'm just venting on here to see whether I'm right to be annoyed about it.

I know I have no idea what it is really like. I'm TTC, so it makes me sad when people seem so ungrateful for the lovely DCs they have - but I'm sure it was written in jest and not intended to upset anyone.