To think that a mother shouldn't threaten to 'Drop Kick' their child on Facebook?

[JudgyOldBag]

A friend of mine has just posted the following status on her Facebook:

"Just about to drop kick DS as he is behaving so badly"

DS is 6. He found out a couple of weeks ago that his parents are splitting up and he's having to move house soon when his mother leaves his father.

AIBU to think that this child needs love and support rather than have his mother joke about threatening physical violence towards him on Facebook? Or am I just being judgey and should take the joke as it was meant?

Who has said that's ok?

The general gist of this thread is that it's okay to say things like this about your kids and anybody who objects is being 'judgy'.

I would like to see the responses on here if a bloke was saying he wanted to drop kick his wife or break her legs in a 'jokey' way.

If it's not acceptable to do it to an adult it shouldn't be for a child either.

Really? I just see people making a distinction between a bit of hyperbole and actual verbal abuse.

surely its about tone and intent?

Of course it is. Saying stuff to your DC is usually all about tone and intent and needs to be kept in context. A lot of things can sound horrible if taken out of context.

I don't think it's the best idea to put stuff like that on FB but if I ever read anything from a friend that is negative about their DC then I tend to think they're having a bad day and venting, not that they're bad parents

Seasick seal - many families Interact in different ways. 'M sure I say all sorts to my kids - it's our in jokes and no one takes them seriously.

BOF I would bet my eye teeth that if a man said this about a woman as a 'bit of hyperbole' Mumsnet would not be saying it was the context which mattered or that we shouldn't judge him.

Not acceptable even as venting to me .

It's not about a woman though, is it? I wouldn't joke about being at the end of my rope and say I wanted to leave my DP out for the blackbirds, nor would I call him a little monkey. It really isn't the same.

And actually, I frequently see threads saying things like "AIBU to feel like throttling my DH?". It's not something I'd say myself, but it's commonly accepted as a vent, even though a minority get offended by that. It's a different kettle of fish when a man says similar about his wife, and rightly so, IMO, because it's in poor taste on a public forum (eg facebook or MN) when it's quite likely that many women reading are experiencing ACTUAL domestic abuse.

So I do think it's different. One is sinister, one isn't.

Cluffy as someone who was locked in a cupboard as a punishment (for stealing food at night because I was being starved) I just don't find 'jokes' like that very funny at all.

To me the term "drop-kick" is very aggressive. Probably because I've heard the threat used aggressively many times, and seen it followed through, it makes me wince.

I think saying you'll "leave them out to the blackbirds" has a lighter tone and isn't as offensive. Nobody knows your tone on fb (or here) so language matters more. In my experience parents who speak aggressively about their kid's commonly do speak aggressively to them, which is abusive.

I'm with crapbag: I don't find violent 'jokes' funny at all. When my mum used to tell me and my younger brother to "Stop it, or I'll bang your heads together!" in front of her mates, her mates laughed. We didn't laugh because the last time she banged our heads together she bust his nose.

It sounds like a lot of people here have a nicer experience of life. But shouldn't we steer more towards the safe side and make it clear that using aggressive language about your kid's is not acceptable. Surely people can vent without actually threatening violence?

kids, not kid's.

I think it's the context. To a lot of people "drop kick" is simply a sporting term conjuring up a bit of a comical image, which clearly wouldn't be literally possible.

I have friends who use the term "drop kick" as a joke. There a saying which involves a "Kirkby kiss", it means to head butt someone (Glasgow says the same).

We all have different personalities and background.

In my family, we swear, not at each other, but generally (we are sensitive to where we are).

I will use jokes amongst my friends and my now adult children, that I wouldn't of, in front if my Nan, or people I didn't know would accept my SOH.

I don't think twice about some things, some of my friends would say and would laugh, if other friends said the same, I would be worried, as it would be out of character.

Some if us are "rougher", for want if a better description. I cannot undo my childhood and my environment and when around some people, I do not want to change, or change them.

Likewise some people use FB as though they are having a private conversation to trusted friends.

My Son in law used to tell my youngest he'd put her in the weelie bin, she knew he never meant it. Recently whilst having Banter on FB, he put it again.

I wonder at the extent that people over around 27 use FB, but other than that, it's no-ones business, tbh.

There are some things which I object to, jokes around sexual abuse etc, meant sexism and Racism, as you cannot use the excuse venting.

I have a friend with twins that frequently offers them for sale, or asks if anyone knows how to make her basement so they can't escape, but I never felt inclined to take it seriously.

Yes, "drop kick" literally is someone talking a shot at goal in rugby. Johnny Wilkinson used to do them admirable.

It's not a physical violence expression, IMO.

AdmirablY.