to not make her a seperate meal?

[fairy1303]

DSD lives here full time.

She is currently having a massive meltdown because I have told her we are having... shock horror... CASSEROLE for dinner.

We have this about once a month, it's cheap, easy, healthy.
I know she doesn't like it.

I have said that is what we are having, no I won't make a seperate meal.
She is telling me not to serve her any. She doesn't want it. She is crying because she 'isn't allowed any dinner'. She has phoned MIL to tell her. She is about to phone my mum to tell her too. She has phoned daddy at work to tell him.

Now, I'm pretty strict. I'm also aware of the wsm stuff.

AIBU to say: that is what we are having. There will be nothing else?

Or am I being too hard on her?

She's 8

Would you cook something your dd didn't like and make her eat it?
Yabu and a bit nasty.
I suspect there is more to this....

She did eat it though, Badvoc - and ate all of it and OP said she enjoyed it.

OP had said that dsd had previously eaten this meal, although it wasn't her favourite, it wasn't like she was retching or anything. Just being a fussy madam.

Bloody hell, we've got casserole conspiracy theorists now.

Yeah.
Fussy eaters are the worst aren't they!? They only do it to piss you off you know. You're making a rod for your back...ad nauseum.
Fgs.
Op didn't answer my question...would she have treated her own dd the same?
If the answer is yes, then fair enough but I suspect it's not.

It appears to suit people to ignore the fact that the child ate it quite happily! She was trying it on! No one forced her, there were no tears, tantrums, drama etc. SHE ATE HER DINNER QUITE HAPPILY!

I was a really fussy eater but no way would I have refused something I had previously eaten without a problem - I would have gone hungry for certain.

Perhaps - just perhaps - children are like us and sometimes don't fancy something that they have eaten before quite happily? Just not in the mood for it, you know?
Just a thought....
But, no!
Then she would be Human and not a "fussy madam"

She ate "happily" , because she gave up - nobody was listening to her. There is a difference. All that ignoring really was worth it for educational purposes, as in the end the OP won, which is the most important thing, after all. Medal is in the post. I'm sure it was an enjoyable day for both OP and DSD. Is casserole worth it? You bet it is!!!

And op says she had a "massive meltdown" btw....
Squoosh....no. I won't actually.
The op asked for opinions.
She's got them.
Up to her if she takes them on board or ignores them, of course.

Oh were you there Toys? Were you in their home at dinner time? So sorry, hadn't realised!

Wow but you sound so very bitter.

In that case Badvoc, I tell them that when they have left home they can buy and cook whatever they want, until then I cook according to my plan and not their whim or whatever fits their mood!

She ate it. OP even offered to make her a sandwich but she didn't want it.

YoutTheCat: My DS started refusing things after around 18 months. No way I would have allowed him to go hungry at that age just because he refused something he would have previously eaten. That is how a range of foods narrows (it is a natural, cautionary development in toddlers - an evolutionary response to increased mobility and independence at that age), and has to then be gently built up again when possible and when the child is ready to try things again (as they will certainly have forgotten what they used to eat as 1 year olds).

So that gives you license to paint the OP as a wicked stepmother? Shame on you.

But she wasn't upset TRL!!
Even thought the op states she was having a "massive meltdown" actually she was fine About it.
Just don't get the angst over making a separate sandwich/something.
As you say, the op "won" which seems to be the main thing here :(
I just would not cook something I knew one of my children disliked. What's the point? It's going to cause hassle.
Seems rather unfair to me...

I am not a doormat waiting to see what my children happen to be in the 'mood for'.! They can put in requests for the next time I go shopping or meal plan. It isn't a restaurant with a choice, and I have other things to do!

Tbh I menu plan to save money and save waste. I do consult everyone else and ask what they might fancy that week. Other than that people get what I've cooked.

Not wicked squoosh, no. This isn't Disney.
Just determined to bend an 8 year old child to her will.
Which disturbs me.

I'm not, squoosh. Spare me your amateur psychology.

18 months is so far removed from 8. The OP's dsd doesn't have additional needs from what she has said.

My ds has issues with food. He has autism and so, when he was at home, I cooked food I knew he would eat because of that.

Badvoc, the OP did offer her dsd a sandwich which she refused.

Perhaps - just perhaps - children are like us and sometimes don't fancy something that they have eaten before quite happily? Just not in the mood for it, you know?

Can see the point that sometimes you're just not in the mood for a certain food. Why the hell should that mean cooking a multitude of different dinners though?!
If that was the way we did it here, it'd go like this. I'd be cooking:

• hot, spicy (vegetarian) curry for DH
• chilli con carne for DS2 (but not ds1 as he doesn't like it)
• ds1 would have toad in the hole as that's his favourite.

So you'd seriously cook 3 dinners all at once so everyone got their favourite? What are you, a short order chef at a restaurant?!
That way lies the road to laa laa land!

The op cooked something she knew this child disliked.
Can't get my head round that.
Why would you do that on purpose?
Unless there was literally nothing else in the cupboards/fridge?

Oh is she a wicked step mother now then badvoc? What a load of shite. I would do the same with my dc as well. And they are not step children. Whats your theory now? child abuse? Referral to ssd needed?