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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that if your child is scared of dogs you should encourage them not to scre and wail if my dog is 300 ft away...

468 replies

Beccadugs · 30/10/2013 21:50

Walking my dog today, she was of lead, about 10ft ahea of me waiting for me to chuck the ball. A child cycled towards us, saw my dog (who is half toy poodle so tiny) and started screaming. My dog just looked at her and then carried on our walk, if she was the type to run up to strangers/kids she wouldn't be off the lead. However, when she was a puppy and less well trained this screaming was an invitation (in her mind) to investigate.

While I accept that some children are scared of dogs, and that is fine. I would have thought that if there is a dog in the general vicinity encouraging your DC not to scream is probably for the best when the dog is ignoring you completely. AIBU, we all want to use the local facilities happily.

OP posts:
Chattymummyhere · 31/10/2013 13:20

Also some dogs are more likely to attack while on lead than they would when off lead if the dog has been attacked while on lead itself by another dog causing the dog to suffer from being anxious

Rinoachicken · 31/10/2013 13:20

chattymummy in that situation, if your dog was ignoring the person, then yes, whoever lashes out at your dog is being unreasonable, as your dog would not be displaying any behaviour that could in any way be interpreted as threatening.

Rinoachicken · 31/10/2013 13:22

Not disputing your last point either, but if its on a lead you can pull the dog away. And if your dog (like mine) is likely to try and go for another dog then it should be muzzled, lead or no lead.

Rinoachicken · 31/10/2013 13:24

If an off lead dog approached an on lead dog uninvited an suffered injury, it would be the off lead dogs owner at fault in my opinion as it would be there dog who was not within their control.

NotYoMomma · 31/10/2013 13:29

I think probably HALF - yes half - the dog owners in my area shouldnt have dogs.

we live in small council and ex council houses. some people have 4 dogs in a 2 bed house and they are noisy and dont get walked often

next door have an alsatian - never gets walked, cant even go on the back garden often - is very quiet and well behaved though.

some seem to be struggling to clothe and feed their kids (judging by the state of them) but have 2 dogs.

people work or have very little time (we live right next to a motorway and very urban) - I think some of owners get dogs for themselves of their DC, rather than because they want to love and nurture a dog.

(this isnt generalising all owners, just some in my immediate vacinity)

intitgrand · 31/10/2013 13:29

or potentially injures
what does potentially injure mean? Behave in a threatening way I guess?? so if your doctor ran after your DC barking then it could be illegal

intitgrand · 31/10/2013 13:30

dog, dog.Where did doctor come from? Smile

Rinoachicken · 31/10/2013 13:33

intitgrand if a dog in the park ran after my son barking I would certainly see that as threatening behaviour. Wouldn't you?

Rinoachicken · 31/10/2013 13:34

And lol at my GP running after my son barking Grin

Labradorwhisperer · 31/10/2013 13:35

I read this post and replies when it first appeared this morning. Some hours on and it has become pretty horrible.

I was going to reply with the view that everybody has a responsibility to each other to make sure people feel safe, and supported, on both sides of this issue.

However, I have come to realise that there is no actual point. Nobody will reflect on a different opinion here anyway.

territt · 31/10/2013 13:41

I think the problem is that some people really shouldn't own dogs.. they should have to take a test and get a licence.

But then I think the same about having kids :-)

Ministrone · 31/10/2013 13:41

I own a small dog who is very friendly and adores small children, however I never let my dog jump up at strangers, often mothers of toddlers will ask if its ok for them to stroke my dog and because I know its safe I say yes

LST · 31/10/2013 13:49

I agree on both points there territ.

Rinoachicken · 31/10/2013 13:51

I agree some sort of test or short course for dog owners, resulting in them receiving a license for dog ownership (or something) would be a very good idea!!

IceBeing · 31/10/2013 14:17

territt well I would certainly agree with that on both counts also.

I would have no problem with you kicking my child if she pulled your dogs tail because there is absolutely no chance she would do that / that I would allow her to do that.

Similarly I would expect most responsible dog owners would have no problem with the idea that I would kick their dog if it got in my DD's face or shoved her over because similarly they would be absolutely certain that this wouldn't happen / that they wouldn't allow that to happen.

It is the dog owners that say 'oh no you shouldn't kick a dog' but fail to see that their dog should never be in that position in the first place that worry me.

Grennie · 31/10/2013 14:18

A dog should never run barking after children. And children should be taught to treat dogs well as well. I have at times after tying my elderly labrador outside a shop, had to rescue her from children climbing over her and treating her like a toy.

We should all have respect for other people and animals we share public space with.

Grennie · 31/10/2013 14:20

And unrespectful dog owners with scary dogs, also tend to have dogs that attack and frighten our dogs. I have had to physically shove other dogs away, while a clueless owner insists there aggressive dog is just playing.

DixonBainbridge · 31/10/2013 14:22

For all those saying I'm in cloud cuckoo land about kids coming up & stroking my dog - Biscuit

When we used to pick our kids up from school we ended up getting a muzzle for him - just so he wouldn't be tempted as all these half-witted parents insisted that their little "darlin's" wouldn't hurt him when running up & putting their hands in his face.

At least when we're out walking now he can get away & between us we've managed to clothesline at least 1 sprog when he's on his (fantastically long) lead...

I'll make sure my dog behaves, you do the same with your sprogs - not sure why so many found that offensive??

DixonBainbridge · 31/10/2013 14:24

FWIW - I get annoyed with other peoples dogs that run & jump up and I'm quite happy to cuff them away.

Not quite as extreme as a (non-dog owning) friend who, after someone's dog had left muddy footprints over his trousers, went up & wiped mud all over the owners jacket!!

Grennie · 31/10/2013 14:26

Momma - I agree people should not have dogs if they can't look after them properly. I do know people in poor areas e.g. single mums, who are poor but still have a big dog as it is the only way they can make sure they are not burgled fairly often.

Single mums and women living alone in poor rough areas are often targeted. If a dog is the way they can defend themselves and their kids, in spite of being poor, I think that is fine. Although the dog should still be well looked after.

livingzuid · 31/10/2013 14:59

Why don't you tell that to all the countless tens of thousands of people who have a guide dog or other assistance dog in their household?

livingzuid · 31/10/2013 15:02

In response to Ice's statement on dogs in society that is.

DiseasesOfTheSheep · 31/10/2013 15:22

IceBeing Thu 31-Oct-13 12:34:34

I have two questions

1. If people really loved dogs, why would they keep them as pets
2. If a dog runs up to my DD (2yo) and pushes her over am I allowed to kick the dog into touch? (I will of course announce loudly that I am just being friendly really

  1. Because dogs are domesticated animals who enjoy being around their owners, and the owners get to enjoy their company and endless devotion. That's something you just don't get from a potted plant.
  1. If my dog were to knock your child over, I would be encouraing you to kick him. For several reasons:

a) what a brilliant piece of negative re-inforcement. Kick him hard and he'll probably not repeat the manoeuvre. Yea, ok, he doesn't "deserve" it because it would be my fault, but life's not fair and I'll take a useful training experience where I can!

b) I would deserve any ensuing vet's fees and guilt for him being out of control

c) it's a hypothetical situation which I am confident wouldn't arise as my dog is not allowed to approach people Wink

AutumnFire · 31/10/2013 15:24

How can a dog on a muzzle bring a ball back?

Velcro on ball.

Velcro on muzzle.

Job sorted! Grin

Grennie · 31/10/2013 15:31

The majority of dogs can not survive without humans. They are domesticated animals.