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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Children should be seen and not heard?

85 replies

Pinkpinot · 25/10/2013 18:22

Is this just an old fashioned outdated sentiment
My mil has just said it to my ds
Really fucked me off

OP posts:
meditrina · 25/10/2013 18:24

Context?

OneUp · 25/10/2013 18:24

I think it's outdated.

Roshbegosh · 25/10/2013 18:25

Awful. Haven't heard that said in years. How old is MIL? Has to be 70+ and even then ...

MamaBear17 · 25/10/2013 18:26

Why would someone day that to a kid?

NotYoMomma · 25/10/2013 18:26

yeah context

LindyHemming · 25/10/2013 18:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ireallymustbemad · 25/10/2013 18:27

I would ordinarily say it's outdated but the way DS1 (12) just spoke to me I'm inclined to agree!! I'd like to be joking but he was such a shit I tipped his dinner in the bin before he ate it. I have never reacted so strongly and thrown away someone's meal before. Tbf I did say a few mins later that he could make himself more. Ahhhhh

Ordinarily though OP I would agree with you!

TheOffspring1983 · 25/10/2013 18:28

I wouldn't say it to a child.

maras2 · 25/10/2013 18:31

Hiya Pink.I bet she wasn't joking either.Is DH home yet?When's MIL going home?

PedlarsSpanner · 25/10/2013 18:32

well if you are church and the couple are saying your vows then yes shut up kids

if you are gambolling in golden hued leaf litter then go ahead, kids

if adults are trying to talk and the child persists in butting in, hmm grey area

so yeah, context is all

Pinkpinot · 25/10/2013 18:42

Actually I'll give you the context
She constantly interrupts and talks over ds who is nearly 6
I'm trying to teach him not to interrupt, to say excuse me, to wait
He's finally getting it
He's told her a couple if times that's she's interrupted him, nicely enough, but I think he's losing his patience
He said today that she was a bit rude as he was talking and that's when she came out with that pearler!

OP posts:
Mintyy · 25/10/2013 18:44

It is just a saying.

Dear oh dear.

pointyfangs · 25/10/2013 18:47

I think she's modelling bad behaviour and I would pull her up on it - she's basically saying 'you are a child and therefore I can interrupt you any time I want.' A terrible example, made worse by the work you have been doing to teach your DS proper conversational etiquette - where no-one gets interrupted.

I don't blame him for losing his patience, you need to back him up.

propertyNIGHTmareBEFOREXMAS · 25/10/2013 18:49

Teachers will talk over him school. Could be quite amusing if be puts them in their place!

BabyDubsEverywhere · 25/10/2013 18:50

"Children should be seen and not heard"

Am I the only one thinking "I wish!" ? Grin

aquashiv · 25/10/2013 18:52

I wish

PedlarsSpanner · 25/10/2013 18:52

ah now, I feel your pain

My mother does this, ever so rude

Teach your kid the interrupting cow joke, you know, knock knock/who's there? The interrupting cow. The interrupt/moo!

aquashiv · 25/10/2013 18:53

Lol snap.

thegreylady · 25/10/2013 18:53

Those were the days mt friends....
[nearly 70]

thegreylady · 25/10/2013 18:54

my

LindyHemming · 25/10/2013 18:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LittleRobots · 25/10/2013 18:56

My dad thinks this. I think its awful.

YoureBeingAnAnyFuckerFan · 25/10/2013 18:58

at 4 oclock this morning I would have disagreed with her and said children should neither be seen nor heard (Hmm ds1!!)

but it sounds like she was making a pathetic dig because a child corrected her on her bad manners. nasty woman.

Mim78 · 25/10/2013 19:01

She was completely wrong. They will never learn not to interrupt if adults do it to them.

Would be fine if it was said in a jokey way in a different context perhaps.

My FIL sometimes interrupts dd (and others)but only because he is deaf!

ouryve · 25/10/2013 19:03

The same could be said for some MILs.