STOP using the word "retard".

[Sparklysilversequins]

This has been done many times before and I can't think why I am needing to do it again, except I have seen it used twice on here this morning already .

It's offensive. It's not JUST a word. It's no less offensive if you prefix it with "emotional" or use it to describe some silly thing you or a friend did, or some bloke you saw with his trousers half way down his backside as young men sometimes choose to do.

It may be that some believe that the use of this word is considered acceptable in other countries (ie the US) and this often trotted out as a reason for its use but that is not actually true here. As of 2014 the American Psychiatric Association plans to replace the term 'mental retardation' with 'intellectual development disorder'" in the 2013 edition of their manual.

most offensive terms used in relation to disability.

HTH.

I agree with the bit of your post where you say you are talking out of your arse too actually.

your kids will go out and repeat it Ring and use it in the hearing of disabled children and hurt them. Makes you feel proud.
Pag was right.

You sound really awful and it sounds like you're bringing up your children to be the same.

If you used that word in public, which you won't because you're full of shit, people would be disgusted by you and I hope would confront you. I certainly would.

I really don't think that appropriate language and when which words beginning with R are appropriate is that complex.

Using a word derived from the old medical terminology for what might now be called Global Development Delay, in order to convey, "that was so silly, I think you acted like someone with a mental disability" is completely and utterly different to using a cognate appropriately when discussing deaccelerating forces on a car. My husband and I can avoid using insulting vocabulary about disabilities and use mathematical vocabulary without causing offence.

I did not realise managing that was the crowning achievement of my life (esp as I hated the Mechanics unit in A-level maths and only got a C).

Why is this even up for discussion?
Nobody debates why the n word is offensive, it's just accepted as such.

Is it because disablism is still accepted?

Why is this even up for discussion?
Nobody debates why the n word is offensive, it's just accepted as such.

Is it because disablism is still accepted?

I disagree about that,my kids can say what they want at home so they dont feel the need to go out and say outrageous words to random kids.Ive actually seen it in action,the kids that say the rudest and nasty things are the most tightly controlled ive ever seen!

cross posts there Ring. I hope you are thinking. I've had adult women and well as kids call dd a 'spazz' and a 'retard' just because she has cerebral palsy. She's a little girl ffs. Big grown women thinking it was funny. Those words hurt and the more they are said, and the more non disabled children hear them and use them the more little children with CP will be hurt, sitting defenceless in their wheelchairs. My child cant answer back because she cant speak but she understands and she can cry.

Ring
Dawndonna's 17 year old dd hear. I note Mum put up earlier that I use the term 'spaz'. I do. I'm a wheelchair user, I have spasticity in my legs, makes them not work too well. How dare you, even in the comfort of your own home use that word, and then come into my home to tell me that you use it. You see, everytime you put something on the internet, it is a gateway into another persons home. So, Ringaring, every time you say Spaz because someone has done or said something daft, you insult me, and make no bones about letting me know that. I consider that to be extremely rude and very hurtful. You see, I'm not stupid, I got A* for my gcses. I will probably get them for my A levels too. Not in the least bit stupid, in fact clever and with far better manners than you and your family. Kindly keep your abhorrent views to yourself in future those of us with disabilities don't appreciate your kind of sharing.

here

Waves at DawnDonna's dd

Well said, as always.

Second what diamond says. It hurts even more when the child hears what looks like a nice normal lady saying it. You expect abuse from some people, but when a mummy is overheard saying it, it feels as if the whole world despises you.

I went to school with a girl who had cerebal palsy, I will never forget her face as she walked down the corridor passed our classroom and someone shouted out " spastic" as she went past on crutches.

Actually the person shouting it wasn't even aware she was walking past.

Thankfully, I think we are winning, I rarely here the word anymore. Retard is still doing the rounds though, but all less than when I was a child.

People keep on kicking up a fuss!

Ive actually seen it in action,the kids that say the rudest and nasty things are the most tightly controlled ive ever seen

not about being tightly controlled, about empathy, being sensitive being human and also thinking - there by the grace of god go I, being in a wheel chair is a fate that could befall us all.

Shhh, I'm supposed to be doing German revision!

(and Thank you)!

I do think it is interesting how some words can lose their original meaning and impact, but some haven't. For example:

Words that are really not ok to use to describe someone:
Retard
Paz
Cripple
Schitzo (sp?)

Words that have original meanings in disability/mental health, but are pretty innocuous now:
Lunatic/loony
Hysterical
Psycho

And some words that are still capable of causing offence, but are getting close to losing their original connotations:
Mong - when used as a verb rather than a noun "I'm just going to mong out on the sofa this afternoon" - I think most people connect this to smoking a bong and getting stoned rather than describing themselves as disabled.
Cretin - Originally a term used to describe people with multiple disabilities, but I would hazard a guess that the majority of the population have no idea of the original meaning, and so it will become no more offensive than describing someone who is doing something dangerous and daft as a lunatic (without actually meaning to insinuate that they have mental health issues).

you sound a bit lacking, ringa.

A perfect example of where some children get these words from Ring

Dawndonna's dd - that was an excellent post. Best of luck with your revision!

Ring, you are normalising these words which means that your children won't think twice about using them in public.

And your attitude about doing what we want in OUR house smacks if entitlement, immaturity and twattery.

I will point out that it's not just in America that the word is still frequently bandied about, especially on chat threads, especially FB (yes I know, dreadful place etc. etc.) - I have friends in Australia who use it frequently.

One of them has 3 children with AEN (thanks for the update!) - one is autistc, another is being assessed for being autistic and we're not sure what's going on with the 3rd one yet. She herself is a nurse and says "I don't know why we have 3 kids who are retarded". She's not being rude, it's just what she knows.

Another is a boy with Asperger's - well actually he is now a man as he has just turned 18. Not only does he use the word about himself but calls his friends the same, even though they don't have Asperger's. His stepfather calls him the same name but with spite and venom attached (completely unacceptable even here).

The poster with whom MissStrawberry lost sympathy is in Australia, she did not call anyone the name but mentioned that someone was "retarded" therefore using the adjectival form - it's not unusual here.

Australian teens are very into American culture as well - and although the word may be being phased out of general use by American adults, it certainly doesn't seem to be among the youth! And is still in common use among the ignorant over there, with little to no backlash that I've seen. Anyone who picks up on it is jeered at.

All that aside, I really really do hope that people stop using it as a descriptor. Ditto fuckt**d.

I would call one of my friends a spastic if they were doing something stupid. My mouth actually dropped open at this

im not sure what to say really.

Theyve never said the word,but if they did i dont think i would tell them off unless they were saying it to be nasty to someone.I guess i just see it as any otherword,i dont really think of the connotations.

I think i need to think about this,so does dh because he says stuff like tihs all the time,and hes a big respectful businessman too!i dont want the kids to be cruel and if any of mine were disabled the idea of someone hurting their feelings like that would absolutley crush me.

I dont say any racist words and if i heard the kids say anything like that i would be fuming and want to know where they got it from,i guess its the same isnt it?racim,sexism,disable ism (is that a word?)theydo say "thats gay" aswell,though they picked that up at school,i think i will pick them up on that the next time i hear them say it and explain it all.

Good for you, Ring.