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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To call in sick?

111 replies

Nicknameinvalid · 03/10/2013 21:01

My dog died yesterday :(

He wasn't breathing quite right, there was nothing massive that we would see but he was off his food and panting a lot - we took him to the after hours vets and they couldn't find his heartbeat - they checked him over and he had fluid on the lungs.. We sat in the waiting room whilst they sedated him to see what the fluid was and his lungs were filled with blood.. They couldn't stop the bleeding and suspect he has a heart tumour that had ruptured.

I'm devastated.. I've spent most of the day in tears and trying to console the children.. He wasn't just a dog he was part of our family and having him put to sleep was the hardest decision I've ever had to make.

I genuinely don't think I can face work tomorrow but am I going to look stupid for calling in sick to work over what most people may think is 'just a dog?'

:( he was only 7 and the house just feels so empty without him.

OP posts:

gobbin · 06/10/2013 13:37

I had to have my first old cat we had as adults put to sleep at 8am and go straight into work. It wasn't pleasant and each class I taught said 'You're looking a bit upset today Miss' so I had to explain my morning at least five times but being occupied helps.

lifehasafunnywayofhelpinguout · 06/10/2013 13:44

If you feel the need to take the day off work then that's up to you. I had something devestating happen to me last week last Saturday I was euthoric and by the Sunday I was lower than a snakes belly. I wont go into details though as this thread is not about me.
I already planned to have Monday off and it did me good to have a good cry and talk to D.P which was very much needed. However by the Tuesday I was glad to be back in work as sitting at home would just make me dwell and ponder, but we're not all like me so do what suits you.

Also sorry for your loss. xxx

TidyDancer · 06/10/2013 14:01

I'm very sorry for your loss OP, and also for the fact that you've had to read some insensitive bullshit on this thread.

Take care.

Original poster

Nicknameinvalid · 06/10/2013 16:16

I'm still reading.. Tho some posts I wish I hadn't thankfully my work colleagues were more sympathetic than some posters (well one anyway)

Thanks to everyone who responded with sympathies - we are toddling along.. House feels absolutely empty.. And at least twice I've called him for something then remembered.. I'm doing better tho, and so are the kids thankfully

OP posts:

HollaAtMeBaby · 06/10/2013 16:44

So sorry about your dog. Losing a pet is AWFUL but as shown by some people's unsympathetic posts coughkangarooshoescough not everyone understands that. Phone in sick, but make up a different (physical) reason why.

SeaSickSal · 06/10/2013 16:52

I agree she should have made up a physical reason Holla. Looking at some of the unsympathetic posts on here shows exactly why.

I totally understand she was devastated and needed a day off. But some people at her work are always going to remember this and view her as unreliable because of it.

Honestly, someone at my work did this and it was remembered years laters when she went for promotions.

FortyDoorsToNowhere · 06/10/2013 17:00

I don't understand the emotional connection with an animal, but even I would say phone in.

You are not going to be useful if you are crying and unable to do your job properly.

If it was one of my employees I would allow them to use their AL or allow them to work the hours back.

lifehasafunnywayofhelpinguout · 06/10/2013 17:05

Forty. You don't understand the emotional connection with an animal? Animals are just like part of people's families. xx

Iamsparklyknickers · 06/10/2013 17:36

Glad to hear you're coping OP.

I had this conversation with a friend who was surprised at how much they grieved their cat. My theory is a pet is generally a being that you take full responsibility for - their health, happiness and all that goes with it. Their character develops into a permanent fixture of your household and day to day life. When your pet dies, especially when you take the decision to pts, all that trust and loyalty they have in you is glaringly obvious and you have absolutely no way to explain what's going on to them.

It's a great thing to have a pet and experience that bond and relationship, something I feel sorry for some people never to have experienced. It's a form of friendship like no other and should be cherished like any other valuable relationship in life - so it naturally follows that there will be grief.

I don't expect everyone to 'get it', but I do think people should respect what others put importance on - none of us have the right to start gobbing off on what should and shouldn't be important to someone else.

FortyDoorsToNowhere · 06/10/2013 18:13

Life, i get that.

That is why I generally have sympathy when some one does lose a pet.

Perhaps it is because i have never had a pet, DS has 2 gerbils and i will clean them out and make sure they have water and food. They are not always in the cage as DH supervises DS with them for hours at the time.

kali110 · 06/10/2013 18:18

Its horrible to lose a pet. I lost my rabbit a few years ago and was devestated. He come to uni with me, spent big birthdays with me, their for me theough breakups. I was so upset. Finally got another pet now and i will be so upset when he passes.

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