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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder why his facebook is so well hidden from me

108 replies

suspiciousgf · 28/09/2013 13:44

I've been dating a guy for a few months, and things seem to be progressing well.

He has a facebook account, but has it very well hidden, (as in I cannot find him at all) and says I don't need to be a friend because it is for professional networking only and that he doesn't use it much anyway.

Should I be a bit suspicious, or is this normal and I should relax and trust him.

OP posts:
AmberLeaf · 28/09/2013 13:45

I would be suspicious.

Is there anything else bothering you about him?

SaucyJack · 28/09/2013 13:46

It sounds like a perfectly normal thing to do....... for a married man.

bragmatic · 28/09/2013 13:47

My FB is like that. It's mostly my female friends. My husband isn't on FB, but if he was, he wouldn't be my FB friend.

That said, most people use LinkedIn for networking, not FB.

Original poster
suspiciousgf · 28/09/2013 13:49

The only other thing that is a bit strange is that I've found his linkedin account online, and some of the details on line don't quite match up with what he's told me about himself (e.g. education)

I haven't mentioned this to him because I don't want him to think I'm goggle stalking him (even though I sort of am!)

OP posts:
Original poster
suspiciousgf · 28/09/2013 13:49

*google stalking not goggle

OP posts:
GinAndIt · 28/09/2013 13:50

Not much point in using it for networking if it's impossible to find Hmm

I would be very suspicious.

puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE · 28/09/2013 13:50

Married....that is all.

YouTheCat · 28/09/2013 13:51

Either he's married or in a relationship.

Drop him.

DiaryOfAWimpyMum · 28/09/2013 13:51

I would be suspicious, I know of a guy who puts his facebook on dating sites and has around 3,000.00 females, obviously that's worse case scenario

AmberLeaf · 28/09/2013 13:52

Not much point in using it for networking if it's impossible to find

Excellent point.

CoteDAzur · 28/09/2013 13:52

Nobody uses FB for professional networking.

HeySoulSister · 28/09/2013 13:53

Have you searched his family and friends?

FrussoHathor · 28/09/2013 13:55

I agree with married. Definately hiding something.

gaggiagirl · 28/09/2013 13:55

Facebook isn't really a professional way to network is it?

He's hiding something. probably the photos of him and his wife

HaroldLloyd · 28/09/2013 13:56

If he's using it for networking why wouldn't you be able to see it still?

Makes no sense.

How can you network out of a secret account?

Think this sounds off.

Original poster
suspiciousgf · 28/09/2013 13:56

I haven't met any of his friends yet, so I can't search for them.

I've met his parents (no siblings), but cannot find them on Facebook.

OP posts:
HaroldLloyd · 28/09/2013 13:57

Surely he wouldn't have the gall to take you to his parents though if he was married or had another girlfriend.

Surely they would be outraged?

Fairylea · 28/09/2013 13:57

Very odd. Run!

Original poster
suspiciousgf · 28/09/2013 13:58

Surely he wouldn't have the gall to take you to his parents though if he was married or had another girlfriend.

Surely they would be outraged?

Yes this is true, but I'm still a bit suspicious.

OP posts:
AmberLeaf · 28/09/2013 13:58

Harold, you would be surprised at how families can be complicit like that.

YouTheCat · 28/09/2013 13:58

Depends how you were introduced.

ivykaty44 · 28/09/2013 13:59

professional networking

yeah right - on FacebookGrin

CSIJanner · 28/09/2013 14:00

What profession is he in? I have friends who have FB but have locked it down for work reasons.

However the red flag is not adding you himself. YANBU

Original poster
suspiciousgf · 28/09/2013 14:00

We were in a restaurant, and his parents were eating there as well (at a different table) They smiled and said hello, but that's all I really saw of them.

OP posts:
YouTheCat · 28/09/2013 14:01

So not really a 'hi mum and dad! this is suspicious my new gf' then?