To want to get a breast reduction done privately?

[basilbrush]

I am 35 and have breastfed 3DC for a year each. With the last baby, my boobs didn't shrink back like they did before. They were always big (D cup) but now they are a massive F cup. I am a size 10 on the bottom half so this makes me look even more out of proportion. I am a healthy BMI but I have been dieting in desperation to see if results in a cup size reduction. Although I lost 7lbs, my bra size has not changed one bit.

Shallow as it sounds, all this is making me very miserable. I have a cupboard full of clothes I can't wear and at work, I feel like my chest is the focus of the conversation, rather than anything else. I find myself in tears a couple of times a week as I try to get dressed... I am very proud of myself for breastfeeding my children but now don't feel like myself anymore.

I could afford just about to save up for a BR (breast reduction) over the next year and it is something I really want to do. My DH is dead set against it, however. He is wonderful and supportive in all other ways but this seems to really upset him. His main reasons are:

1. Risks of the operation / complications etc which are totally avoidable as it's not a vital procedure
2. I am being shallow / superficial and should just get a grip and learn to love myself. There are people with much bigger problems in the world etc
3. I am setting a negative example to my daughters about body image
4. I am selfishly wasting money (5-6K) that we need in our savings
5. I may have permanent scarring that he may find ugly and off-putting

I can see that he has very valid points apart from perhaps the last one...? AIBU?

Oh Grunt I hope I haven't upset you, sorry

No, absolutely not, Alibaba. After all, we're always hearing that most women are wearing the wrong sized bra, so yours was a perfectly logical question.

I was one of those who said I'd had surgery but they've grown back. Just wanted to clarify that its not due to weight gain, as I'm actually slimmer now than pre-surgery. Which in itself is no surprise, as its a lot easier to move around without all that excess flesh.

But yes, they grow back, but they're not as heavy and uncomfortable, and from a vanity point of view they're a better shape too. So all in all I'm still certain it was worth it.

Grunt :)

I haven't read all of the replies to your post - but here's my tuppence worth.

I had always had stupendous norks! I always hated them and they made me feel so self conscious. Post breast feeding and despite shrinking back to a size ten I had these huge, pendulous boobs. I felt horrible despite DH's reassurances to the contrary. No item of clothing made me feel good.

After much research and discussion with my DH I saw a Consultant privately and he listed me for surgery. From the first moment that I woke up from the anaesthetic I knew that I'd made the correct decision. I felt and still feel fantastic. It sounds melodramatic but this procedure was utterly life changing for me.

The most important practical advice I can offer is to research extensively and choose your consultant carefully. I chose someone who specialises in plastic surgery for burns victims. Very clinically minded and anti cosmetic surgery clinics.

OP people can advise you and tell you of the risks, of the reasons for and against. You are the only one who knows how it feels to live in YOUR skin.

I suspect that 2 years from now I will still feel the same way, despite spending a couple of hundred quid on bras. I can't remember a time since Year 11 when I haven't felt uncomfortable about them and now they're even bigger, I don't think those feelings are going to subside...But as I've said, there'll be no rushing into this decision, I have lots of time to analyse and agonise...

not holden caulfield,

Can you please tell me who your surgeon was and if you would recommend him or her? You can send me a private message if you like. I am new on this site. I am just getting started and am finding it difficult finding information on surgeons. Thank you

Hello! Can you see what you think for size for me, please, as I can never get bras to fit.
35.5" under boobs.
Standing up straight over boobs - 41"
Um, bending over and letting them dangle (is that right?) 42.5ins

Main problem is one boob is bigger than other, so I have to choose between one popping out of smaller cup, or one with gapping.

Currently in 36DDs. Doesn't really fit either boob right?

I think you should spend a fraction of the money instead on new, high quality bras and clothes that fit well.
Your breasts aren't that big and it is big, dangerous op. Please don't surgically change your body because you think people focus on them. You don't need to change they do.

kentishgirl Try 34FF/G and 36F/FF. What's your 36DD like? How far can you pull it away from your body? If you scoop, do you get overspill?
There are ways to cope with asymmetry but in the first instance fit to the larger breast.

I had a breast reduction to take me down from 40DD to 36C. It is the best £4000 I have ever spent.

I tried correctly-sized bras and specialist bras but it was futile as I was still left with ongoing back and neck pain. Also, even though I was a size 12, I could never find clothes that fitted me correctly and wearing any kind of buttoned shirt was pointless because they would always pop open.

I did a lot of research into different clinics before settling on one, and I was made fully aware of the risks involved in the operation. Yes, I was left with significant scarring but that was more to do with me going back to work before the recommended recovery period of a couple of weeks. My partners have never been bothered by the scars ( you can only see them fully under direct bright light anyway).

I have not suffered any kind of back or neck pain since the op and I cannot emphasise how much my self-confidence improved afterwards. I was able to wear a bikini for the first time in nearly 40 years and I am able to participate in a lot more sports activity now that I don't have to lug around the equivalent of two bags of sugar on my chest.

It's a decision you have to make based on what is comfortable for you, not what is comfortable for anyone else. It's your body.

The op doesn't have pain.
Even so Pain can be sorted with a good bra and strengthening your back.

No it can't. I tried. Still, it's her decision, not yours.

I know it's her decision but she asked for opinions...

I'm reposting this link to a newer form of breast reduction (mirco lipo) without scars or huge downtime - another poster showed it and it looks a good option for those considering it!

www.theprivateclinic.co.uk/media-gallery?treatment=78

I've had one and have mentioned it on several similar threads. Very happy.
Your DH's point 1, possible nasty repercussions but very unlikely.
2, if he had giant, painful, testicles which everyone stared at he would get something done about them.
3, if you had sons and he had the huge testicles he would not hang into them for fear of a negative body image.
4 he would spend money on reducing said testicles
5 scarring will be minimal.
Go for it.

A friend had it done quite recently. I have bigger breasts than her and a smaller frame at an F cup and a size 8 and have always loved my figure so the vanity side of it seemed strange to me at first, especially as she had no pain with them but she is so happy she went ahead.

The surgery aspect would worry me, especially now you have children but then again, lots of people have surgery for elective reasons.

1. How old is your youngest child? I wonder if you've given your body long enough to settle down. My youngest is 6 & my boobs we're still changing 4-5 yrs after I stopped feeding him.

2. you say you're a healthy BMI, but what is your BMI now compared to pre-pg when the boobs were a manageable size?

Sorry if you said & I missed those, I tried to read carefully, honest.
I think surgery is a big deal & I'd want to rule other possibilities out first.

Your DH makes valid points but psychological health matters too. Whether that would be better addressed with time, better bras, new clothes/clothes advice and counselling or surgery I don't know.

how could a breast reduction alter the size of your back/ribcage? If you went from a 40DD to a 36C? I've only ever heard of a reduction reducing actual breast tissue.

ah, actually, I've re-read the post, and poster said she was a size 12. Surely the 40DD can't have been the correct size then? A 12 dress size is something like a 36 inch bust, so it doesn't make sense that someone could be a size 12 yet measure 40 inches round the ribs before you factor in the breasts on top of that.

The op never said she has any pain. This is not a factor yet many posters keep mentioning it as though it is.
Not everyone with big breasts has pain.

Pain can be sorted with a good bra and strengthening your back.

Hah. No.

I had it done hmmm... fifteen years ago, when I was a DD heading for an E. I went down to a C, and am now steadily a D, not getting any bigger. Best thing I ever did. Being really short, I can't understate how bloody matronlyI looked in everything. People actually thought I'd got taller.

Madasfish for a lot of people pain can be sorted by a good bra. Not trying to be contrary, but it is a fact. Most women are wearing the wrong size and if the band is too loose it can be the source of a huge amount of back pain. I'm a 30HH, and I don't suffer from back pain. However when I was in the 36F I used to wear (and was fitted in by M&S) then yes, I had lots of back pain.