To want to get a breast reduction done privately?

[basilbrush]

I am 35 and have breastfed 3DC for a year each. With the last baby, my boobs didn't shrink back like they did before. They were always big (D cup) but now they are a massive F cup. I am a size 10 on the bottom half so this makes me look even more out of proportion. I am a healthy BMI but I have been dieting in desperation to see if results in a cup size reduction. Although I lost 7lbs, my bra size has not changed one bit.

Shallow as it sounds, all this is making me very miserable. I have a cupboard full of clothes I can't wear and at work, I feel like my chest is the focus of the conversation, rather than anything else. I find myself in tears a couple of times a week as I try to get dressed... I am very proud of myself for breastfeeding my children but now don't feel like myself anymore.

I could afford just about to save up for a BR (breast reduction) over the next year and it is something I really want to do. My DH is dead set against it, however. He is wonderful and supportive in all other ways but this seems to really upset him. His main reasons are:

1. Risks of the operation / complications etc which are totally avoidable as it's not a vital procedure
2. I am being shallow / superficial and should just get a grip and learn to love myself. There are people with much bigger problems in the world etc
3. I am setting a negative example to my daughters about body image
4. I am selfishly wasting money (5-6K) that we need in our savings
5. I may have permanent scarring that he may find ugly and off-putting

I can see that he has very valid points apart from perhaps the last one...? AIBU?

DD has this issue - she is a 32F or G depending on shop and a size 8. No clothes particularly jackets ever fit. I'm going to show her this thread - really pertinent points seem to me to be that (a) they might grow back anyway and (b) there is a risk with all surgery and this is long and painful.

I've spent approximately £600 in getting two lovely tailor made jackets for her, that actually fit properly. It is a fraction of the cost of surgery and I hope it works to cheer her up!

Basil I am a size 16, and I wear a 34 back.

You are almost certainly either a 30 or even a 28, and you'll be more like a G or H cup.

Go and measure tightly underneath your breasts, and then bend forward 90 degrees and measure around the fullest part of your bust. Then come back and post your measurements. :)

captainmummy You may well have had a professional fitting but without a doubt you are wearing the wrong size bra. No one that's a size 10 needs a 36 inch band bra. You are more like a 30.

The volume of a 36DD bra is the same as a 34E, 32F, 30E.

A C cup is really very small as it represents a 3" difference between the under bust and over bust measurements. My 11 year old niece in law is a 28C.

No, I think I am a top-heavy freak!

Under boobs measures 32cm, round middle of boobs is 38cm (with bra on, is that right?!)

Wuldric if she is a size 8 then she is not a 32 back, definitely not.

She will be 28 or even 26.

The reason her clothes aren't fitting properly is that her bra isn't keeping her boobs in the proper place.

No bra off!

And do you mean inches?

OK, bra off! Everyone one in office is staring....JOKE

So 31 inches tightly underneath and about 38 inches over widest part

YANBU. You are not being in the least shallow. Personal comfort is extremely important and affects your everyday quality of life. I'm sure if you have the operation, you won't think twice about your concerns, except just to feel glad that you went ahead!

basilbrush Your measurements suggest trying a 30FF/G and a 32F/FF.

However, if a 34F is fitting you in the cup (have you scooped?) then a 32FF and 30G will the minimum cup volume that's going to work. You may need to try a 32G and a 30GG (then you'll be my bra twin!).

Wow your measurements sound just like mine...I had no idea I was a 'top heavy freak'

YABVU to in any sense link this to your Bfing. Every pregnancy changes your body in different ways. Bfing or not makes no difference to that.

I have v similar measurements too! I would in no way class myself as big boobed. It must all be perspective.

hmm indeed it is all perspective.

I can't help wondering if surgery is really the correct response to irrational hatred of an aspect of your appearance....seems more of an MH issue to me.

I think that is why cosmetic surgery can appear addictive....because people change one thing then get all upset about something else...change that and get upset about something else...and repeat.

because the problem is being upset with your appearance...not your actual appearance...which is fine.

I agree, of course, it's a very personal thing. It's how it makes YOU feel I suppose, that's important. And I was just joking when I said I must be a freak!

I also know that this could have happened if I hadn't BF either. I am not "blaming" BF as such - it's just that BF in a way to me is like an extended pregnancy, it's beautiful and miraculous but your body is being shared by somebody else for a while! And I feel like I haven't quite got my body back yet!

I am in no way thinking of rushing into the operation. I couldn't afford it yet anyway. I intend to give all the less drastic options my best shot first - dieting a bit more, exercise and a pilgrimage to Bravissimo (unfortunately my nearest one is 100 miles away!!)

I agree that you're in the wrong size bra and a correct one may make you feel differently about your breasts. Have you considered speaking to your GP about how you feel? Two of my friends have had breast reductions on the NHS recently and both are really pleased they went ahead (although one of them was only reduced to a G!)

unfortunately therapy and getting your brain back in order isn't cheap either....

OP get on line. Order loads from bravissimo. Send back what doesn't fit. They can fit over the phone too. John Lewis are also good. After 2 DC and no BF I'm still 2 sizes up. But at a size 10 and 30 F I look in proportion, and a million times better than I would in the 34D marks and spencer would put me in.

If after all that, and a honest exploration into whether this is about your breasts or your head, you still want it done, I would go for it.

I sympathise 100% as I'm thinking of doing the same. It's horrible to have to face two huge pillows on your chest that are the focus of everyone and everything all day and all night. I wear the right bra now after years of wearing 36DDs/Es (now wear a 32G) but it's just made my bust more 'in your face' - so much so that people keep asking if I'm wearing a push up bra. I have the dreaded Lititia Dean effect of having broad shoulders, short neck and big upper arms too so even worse. Have you been to your GP OP? Have you spoken to your mum? Does she have the same problem? (i.e. do you see the 'end result' in her)?

No, my mum is quite small in the chest. When I was 16, I was put on the pill for heavy periods and whoomph, I went from an A cup to a D in 6 months. My mum recently admitted that she felt dreadful for going along with the GP as it obviously had such an effect on my not yet stable hormones! So, I think in the back of my mind, I've always felt that I've been wearing the wrong boobs!

Get some good bras. Go to Rigby & Peller for a fitting, and buy a couple of bras, around £60/each. Yes, expensive, but much cheaper than an operation.

Will make a world of difference.

You sound just like me OP. I was put on the pill at 15 to stop me flooding everywhere (always at school!) and I went from athletic (like my mum and sister) to pneumatic overnight. Had to stop gymnastics and athletics as my balance (and confidence) went.

OK - I've measured; my chest is 32" under boobs, and bending forward they measure 38". My bra says 36DD and is perfectly fitting, stays level and doesn't ride up at the back, no 4-boob-effect.

Sorry - that should be 40", hanging down

Captain on those measurements you are around a 32FF.