DS made fun of at school for having Aldi packed lunch!

[bimbabirba]

More of a WYBU.
DS started at a private school last week. He's in YR 6. Everything was going well until we decided to switch to packed lunches because he hated the hot lunches the school provides for £3.50 a meal. Some kids have been noticing that the drinks and snacks in his lunch box are Aldi's and have been saying things like "Ewww... Aldi, that place is horrid! How gross!".
DS is so embarrassed that every morning he tippexes the Aldi brand or he goes over it with a marker pen but they recognise the packaging and still make fun of him!
I can't believe I have to deal with this! WYBU to mention it to his teacher? He's new and I don't want to make it worse by making him unpopular.

being bullied at school has nothing to do with your childs lack of self esteem. Its to do with other kids being bullies

I think the problem is that you are giving your child ready wrapped processed food.

A sandwich, or roll, made with ham and cheese at home, wrapped in a sandwich bag from your drawer would not contain the Aldi logo, or any logo.

An apple, or half a banana, or a cluster of grapes are all without logos.

A bottle of water does not have a particular logo.

Is it not much more expensive to buy pre-wrapped "lunchbox" shite?

I second what jamdonut has said - he should reply to their taunts with 'Yes, it's from Aldi, voted the best supermarket of the year for the past two or three years. Where's your lunch from?'
Or he could just say 'Yes, it's from Aldi, how is that a problem for you?'

I was bullied in school and if I actually answered back, they were shocked into shutting up.

She shouldnt have to buy from expensive shoos just because she sends her son to private school. Maybe she needs to save money on food because shes sending him to private school.

The bullies are the parents. I shop at waitrose as it's the nearest supermarket.

I don't have time to shop around.

It think it's indicative of the parents at your school who think that the demographics at their private school should be like this, and shop like that.

Shame really.

My kid goes to state school. And it was the same when two years ago one parent had a macdonalds party. My view was bring it on -ds never had a hamburger (fussy eater) - he might in the company of other kids. Good. Other views 'well, OK, not great, but a bit of an education for our darling brat' and those parents were downstairs scoffing their faces with burgers and milkshakes.

You're at a school where parents are judgemental and assume their way of life is superior. How you deal with it is your business.

You may feel (or made to feel) you have to change to fit in with the big crowd. Shame though. It would drive me nuts.

It's the same food. Different packaging.

"being bullied at school has nothing to do with your childs lack of self esteem. Its to do with other kids being bullies"

so true. I was lucky enough to have good self esteem but still got bullied for being poor and ugly.

It is always the fault of the bully.

Is he the poor kid? You say last year he was at state school and you shopped at M & S. Now he's at private you're struggling with packed lunches?
I can't believe other people are so interested in your packed lunches. The teacher used to call them posh and now he's being bullied because they're not posh enough?
Are you sure he's telling the truth?

I can imagine that many parents pull in their belts to fund their kids at private school. It isn't cheap.

A lady at my school had a winge about having had an argument with her v. young daughter about what she was going to wear at school (no uniform) - I could see nothing wrong with how her daughter was dressed and it took an age to get out of the mother her issue was thinking her daughter looked 'poor'. I was v. shocked. I thought her daughter looked clean and comfortable and ready for a day at school.What else was she supposed to look like?

some of these label snobs want to get a life, and more concern themselves about things that matter, like not getting into debt to finance a life style they cannot afford but do so just to keep up with their so called friends who are over stretching themselves too, pathetic idiots. i feel sorry for the kids when the poo hits the fan.

motherofbear you speak my lingo, high five ! you go girl, some times these idiots need telling what's what.

This is nothing to do with it being a private school. You get kids (and adults) like that everywhere, obsessed by brand labels. Very sad and all about their own insecurities. They obviously don't feel good enough for it to matter so much. I would try to help your son develop his confidence and self esteem. Once he fights back people will see he's not an easy target.

some kids will always find something to bully about - they all seem to be designed to be little sods, don't know why.

your child is being bullied, the brats would find a reason. He needs to learn self-defence but as he is so young, time to involve the teachers.

This thread reminded me of a conversation I had years ago with a colleague. Her kids went to private school and (not idea how this came up!!) it was ok to have Lidl or Aldi stuff but Asda was viewed as beyond the pale.

Different mind set perhaps up here, most of my pllc

But I'd say that the kids in this case are being told by parents what's right food and wrong food.

My kid gets dragged to waitrose for the food shop every week. He hates it because it's boring.

I got dragged to the food shop with my mum nearly 40 years ago and I hated it and it was borning.

I had no idea if it was posh food shopping. My son has no concept of the brand and what it means. He just hates it. He'd never sneer at anyone's packed lunch because of the brand. He has no idea. And I'm glad he doesn't. Any more than he'd sneer at the types of food anyone else was eating. It's rude. Bloody rude.

Shit... Colleagues sent their DCs to priv school and most think Waitrose is too expensive.

The kids are obviously being twattish but if he really can't bear it, is there anything than can be decanted into tubs or would that attract more attention?

FloggingMolly why don't you think it's true?

"The teacher used to call them posh and now he's being bullied because they're not posh enough?"

When I came to a new school I was considered poor but posh. Posh because I was well spoken, poor because I wasn't fashionable and didn't have the 'right' things.

teachers do contribute to this kind of bullying. They shouldn't but they do, often without realising.

Meant he'd 'never sneer' at anyone elses packed lunch food - forget the brand - I'm saying the contents.

And good on him.

IMO it is always better to equip a child with the means to stand up for themselves independently, simply because a teacher won't always be around. It's a lesson that carries on well into the wider world, where other adults will often choose not to get involved rather than defend someone who is being bullied.

I would talk to the school about this because if we really want to stamp out a culture in which bullying thrives, we have to start with institutions.

Then I would discuss ways of dealing with this with my child. Role play can work well too.

Sadly, many children simply don't have the confidence to be able to do this well, and these children can be the ones who will always struggle even as adults if placed in a situation where someone decides to scapegoat them. However, if institutions take bullying seriously, they can at least be protected from it at school and in a workplace.

and I still remember kids in school saying to me 'I saw you in Hyper Value at the weekend' (hyper value is a cheap pound shop type place) and 'you had those socks on yesterday'

kids are horrible sometimes and no doubt their attitude comes from their parents.

DS has been on the receiving end of a bit of this stuff (not over his lunchbox!) and we have been reading this book Bullies Bigmouths and so-called Friends which has been quite helpful to him.

I moved my sons from State to Private 2 years ago. They are 9/10.

I often buy stuff like juice and treats at Lidl.

Oldest boy sometimes takes a carton of Vitafit (lidl brand) to school. He said some of the boys had laughed at him drinking the wrong orange juice. Luckily, his instinct was to laugh too and say :" the WRONG orange juice, what can be wrong about orange juice, you are not making sense". When they mentioned it again he just said "whatever" in a genuinely unconcerned way. He can still giggle about "the wrong orange juice" at times.

That was that. But if they would have touched a nerve, I might have given him unbranded stuff (ie orange juice in drinks bottle). Though I am stubborn enough notbto change my shopping habits for some little brats, and would most likely let DC find a way of dealing with this.

Conformism is just so boring.

I strongly believe you have to help children to become resilient and deal with this kind of bullying. Teaching kids this age the power of "whatever" can be useful.

Incidentally, everyone in our school goes skiing, it is all everyone talks about in winter. People are just astounded that we don't ski. It is not something we could or would afford easily. Step in DH who is scruffy countryside posh, saying " I can't believe anyone would just disappear for a week in the middle of the hunting season!" That shut up the nouveau's.

Anyway, hope you sort it out and your boy settles in. It can be hard at this age. Support him, listen to him, amd help him come up with a strategy to deflect the bullies.

The are lots of people at private school who are not actually super wealthy and scrimp and save in other area's, witness the 2nd hand uniform shop!

So you don't need to posh up to fit in.

parmarella- I'm sorry, but your school sounds ghastly............

Rockinhippy. In your post you say your brother is a nervous wreck because your Mum cow towed to bullies. I was a nervous wreck because my parents DIDN'T. So what stops people from being a nervous wreck from bullying then? Someone said on here you have to tailor your approach to your child I agree with that. I also agree with Branleuse's posts.

Ha ha do they not know that this is where the real bourgeoisie shop. Teach your child to look down his nose at them. Perhaps offer some financial planning advice if they wish to retain any family wealth.