To not get why people hate Dubai so much?

[Cutitup]

What is there to hate?

I think it's a great place to have a holiday. Great restaurants, great service, fab shopping and spa treatments.

I do understand the problems of domestic and construction staff being exploited but this is not a problem unique to Dubai. I just don't get the vitriol, the 'it has no culture' etc.. I say get out of the bitter farm and play with the hay!

oh please it is buying desperate people

if they were not desperate do you think they would really leave their families to wait on complete strangers

no doubt someone will say it is only what au pairs from sweden do

How exactly do you define "sponsorship" to be relevant in this context?

"To sponsor" doesn't mean anything like employ, be legally responsible for, police the behaviour of, or prevent from leaving the country if you so wish.

That poster is treating her maid like a pet dog. If she misbehaves or gets into trouble in anyway, it is her fault and she will get fined. That is her concern. Not that the maid is an adult woman who should be allowed to fucking going out when she wants!

And it seems to go without saying that if the maid gets in to trouble - ya know with a fucking sexual predator, it will be all HER fault. I have the rage now.

No, it won't be her fault. She is a pet maid. It will be her owner's employer's fault.

Portofino. I agree, it is fucking scary. And there are posts which are even worse.

The whole sponsor thing is hugely fucked up and open to so much abuse. Plus the culture of entitlement making awful things and view points normalized.

Quite an eye opener.

Remind why again why certain people 'love Dubai'....

www.expatwoman.com/forum/topic203766-so-sad.aspx

It's a total other world. And I'm not even posting the bad ones.

Beachcomber

www.theguardian.com/world/2013/sep/25/revealed-qatars-world-cup-slaves

Indeed beachcomber .

And there is me feeling guilty for having a cleaner. Who I pay via the legally obliged Belgian service cheque scheme, so she is insured and gets her tax and NI paid. And who I talk to like she is a normal human being and not some skivvy who gets to clean my shit. And I don't get to keep her passport, police her movements and make moral judgements about her wanting to go to the pictures. (In case she gets raped - where it would be my fault and I might get a fine)

We should flood that forum and give those expat women a real talking to.

They need some BIG TIME wake-up call. I want to just really point the mirror at them, so that they can see what most people see in them.

Aah Tasmania, but going on responses here, that would have no effect. We would just be seen as ignorant as we haven't been and are not worthy of having an opinion, as we probably just read some shit in the daily Mail.

and really what good would we be doing as so many have a better life than they did before

also we do not understand me/asian culture and are looking at things from a european point of view

see they obviously do not bother treating each other with respect and dignity like we do

Really, most of the women on that thread were challenging the Op. you can think what you want of many expat women but the truth is many of these either fat arsed or skinny gym bunnies with tango leather skin gin swiggin braying expats are probably doing more to improve the lives of these maids than those in the UK sneering with their feigning shock horror.

Haven't lived in Dubai but did employ maids in Asia. Much of the way they are treated is awful, it should be illegal, it should be condemned, it should be clamped down upon. We see it, can't do much about it other than try and make our own maids lives easier and better. I totally support changes in the law and better treatment for these women.

And again, so what are you actually doing to help these women then? Yip, I had a maid and I know she was happy to be employed by us and that we helped her.

Portofino

The more time I spend looking at that forum, I wonder how - shock horror - I can live without a maid here in the UK.

It is just sooooo impossible, isn't it... to have a maid that dares to ask for a day off once a month, when I have this huge pile of laundry that needs doing, dinner to be cooked, the kids to be look after... just so that I can enjoy the cheap SPA treatments and lunch with my friends. I mean, how could I possibly be a SAHM without a maid?!?!

A few seconds in these women's heads are enough to make me throw up.

but maybe you can not see it

some of us may help in other ways (i send money to my family so that is very personal) i would not live that life of living in a country like dubai where there is such a divide and have house staff it is not something that i would feel comfortable with or like it is not a life that i desire at all

BlingBang

When I was little, we lived in Asia, too. We had several employees, incl. maids/nannies - I must have been too much of a terror or my parents thought the work was not enough for one person to do.

However, there was often a deal in place where the maids/nannies were actually sent to evening school by my parents to 'better' themselves (i.e. learn English, typing courses, etc.). Those who did well at school usually left after about 2 years and became secretaries at large firms. Being a maid was not endgame. I know that because we visited my 'favourite' nanny when I was about 5, and she seemed happy with her career working in an office environment, without having to clean up and look after a little terror like me.

Do they give maids opportunities for further education in Dubai???

Tas - so your parents were right on and their maids benefitted but you don't give that doubt to others who employ maids. By what your saying your parents fall into the same bracket as shallow, exploitative expats of today. Would you describe your parents as such?

Freud - well it is a struggle. I too never, thought I would employ house staff or feel comfortable with it (and maybe I never did feel completely comfortable with it). But we did, didn't go seeking it out as I insisted it probably wasn't our thing. We sort of fell into it, friends were moving on and their Maid was looking for a new employer. I like to think we treated her with respect. Specifically chose a home with better maid accommodation. Paid her way over the minimum rate, sent her home twice a year when the legal requirement was - flight at the end of a two year contact. She probably had about five weeks holiday a year at least and though she worked for us for less that two years we still gave her a years bonus in wages when we parted as we worried that she hadn't actually saved much for herself over the years. We would have totally supported her in any education or further learning she would have looked into and probably paid for it. Years later, we are still in touch and we would still have no hesitation in helping her out if she needed it.

Not looking for a medal as we were not a charity and I enjoyed the break from housework etc for a few years. Make of it all what you will. Nothing is ever just black and white.

BlingBang

I am referring to that EW forum. Most maids in Dubai are not locals (challenging you to find me an Emirati maid!). In the places we used to live in, all our maids/nannies/employees were locals, and therefore have lived in the area all their lives (no isolation/family nearby) and were not left with zero rights - especially not for the sole reason of them being maids and them also being women. Because of this, there were no issues with keeping passports away from them (!!!). Plus, they had most weekends off as far as I can recall.

You just can't compare it to foreign maids working in Dubai. Our maids/nannies were essentially employees. In Dubai, they seem to be property more than anything else...

Lived in Singapore where all the maids are migrants mostly. No, we didn't hold our maid's passport though I know many employers do. We are supposed to be responsible if the maid acts up or falls pregnant etc but we took out extra insurance to cover any fines and let our maids make their own decisions. Just because you are an expat and employ a maid does't necessarily make you a shallow cunt.

Maybe it is the attitude that is very obvious in Dubai that money is everything and that you can buy people and as I have said before the huge divide. I am sure not all are treated badly but many are as they are bought, a commodity

Some of my family in Sri Lanka have housemaids you do it need to be wealthy to have one. I did not like them hovering about and would not let them do anything for me (not easy) but the attitude is not the same. I am not suggesting for one minute they are all treated well but their society is different attitudes are different

TBH, I don't think people in the UK probably realise that having house staff is actually pretty much part the culture, not something that came about because of rich white expats or colonials. All the countries like The Phillipines, Sri Lanka and Indonesia etc where many of these maids come from all have a culture of maids and house staff themselves. I'd be curious to know what life is like for maids in these countries.

BlingBang

We lived in the countries you mentioned / have friends who grew up there. Never ever mention that you crave some type of food or something, because one hour later, it may well be on the table, without you knowing how it got there. Where we lived, in the older, established households, it wasn't/isn't just one person... think Downton Abbey with separate quarters and often 5+ people working for one household. It is therefore not that lonely for them, and you often hear laughter and constant gossiping through the windows that overlook their quarters. They are not 100% busy, if you get what I mean. That to me makes a huge difference compared to the situation in Dubai where one maid is often responsible for EVERYTHING.

I do wonder whether things are changing in those countries though as many young professionals have modern-day appliances that negate the need for maids.