To wonder why people can't keep their houses in a basic state of cleanliness?

[HarderToKidnap]

Disabilities aside, why can't people keep their homes basically clean?

I work part time, have a messy dog, a demanding toddler, am extremely lazy but my house always looks OK. You couldn't eat your tea off the top of the door frames but the kitchen surfaces are clean, floors hoovered, sofas plumped and inviting, toilet free of poo crumbs. It's easy and doesn't take long. So WHY do I go round to so many of my friend's houses and see they live in complete pits? Gritty nasty sofas that are horrible to sit on, filthy kitchens, poo smears and crumbs all over toilet, minging hand towels, floors covered in bits. IT IS NOT HARD to do the basics. I've just done a house once over and it's taken 45 minutes.

I understand not wanting to spend all day dusting your books or whatever but when people are coming over why wouldn't you want them to feel clean and comfy in your house? I'm not talking about people that physically can't do it because of illness or disability, but the rest of you? WHY??!!!

Fanny I asked on the first page but no answer

I'm scared of googling.

SP, Schrodinger - here you go

(It's another one of those 'it was funny at the time' phrases)

It's like crumbs....of poo

Well I work 2 or 3 days a week, have no children and my house it a complete mess. Dog hair and junk everywhere. I throw out a shopping bag full of junk at least once a week, I don't know where it all comes from. Dusting bores the fuck out of me. It just comes down to the fact that I don't care. And I have better things to be doing. This week it's especially bad because we had a bereavement.

I'm knickers and no fur coat!

Ermm Yuck

Sorry EvenBetter - I didn't mean yuck about you, it was about the poo crumbs!

Poo crumbs are microscopic particles of shit that blast out of your bum when you fart. That's why it's important to wear knickers at all times, especially in bed, because otherwise your sheets will be covered in faeces and therefore so will you.

It's a bit like eating Coco Pops in bed but much worse.

Someone posted a thread about their husband leaving poo crumbs around. I think it was established that they came from someone not wiping their arse properly/at all, and once body heat made the smeared shite dry, it went all crumbly and encrusted. The mind boggles.

I couldn't live in a dirty untidy house but others seem to manage without too many problems, some even seem to have pride in their grime but as long as i dont have to live there i dont spend too much time worrying about it.

Well there you go, another educational afternoon thanks to mumsnet. Who knew some people had crumbly poo and left it on the seat. I might cut dh a little bit of slack for occasionally dripping wee on the floor

Haha! Snowing, if you saw the state of my house ATM that's what you would be saying!

I have five kids, two dogs, four rats and three cats. Things get messy fast.

I am in a good routine so my house is never dirty or badly untidy, but it is very lived in. The hairs from my pets in insane though.

I washed my kitchen floor this morning and it already needs doing again.

ha ha that reminds me of the Easter Sunday when dd2 was days old and dd1 was about 2 and somehow my precious new tiny baby in a sparkling white baby-gro got all .... smeared brown and chocolatey.

forgot to mention I live in a tiny 2 bed and am currently on mat leave - so probably have more energy, even on little sleep, than I will when I go back to work in January, at which point my house will resemble a tip!

Poo crumbs - bits of poo, tiny bits, the kind that get left behind after a flush. At least that's what I think they are. I've never experienced it - I've seen skid marks, of course (not from me, my poo is made of buttercups and rainbow silk and smells of honey dipped in vanilla).

I haven't had poo crumbs in my house since my youngest was 5 and learnt to wipe his arse properly.
Even my 2 teen sons know how to use a loo brush and domestos wipe so we dont have skiddy loos either.

Nothing more minging in life than going to use a loo and seeing someones leavings still hanging about.

Gost it can take be 45 minutes just to tidy out lounge diner so I can clean. Either yo haveca small house, or very tidy dp and dc.

This thread is becoming a bit like the Yorkshire Monty python sketch- well I have 12 children, 8 dogs, 5 cats, 67 gerbils etc

I was messy when I had no kids, so adding two children was never going to improve the situation. Last week I noticed that dd (13 months) was eating a cheerio off the floor. Then I remembered that we ran out of cheerios at least 3 days ago. Ah well, it didn't kill her!

Try having a bum shuffler to show how dirty your house is even after cleaning. Her bum is always filthy. Maybe I should fashion some clothes out of dusters.

I rather agree with OP - I don't believe there is anyone who has no time to ensure a level of basic hygiene. If you are out all day then (assuming you don't leave small children home alone) your house will stay clean, no? If you are home with children/animals then presumably you can make time for basic cleaning.

If you can't keep your house basically clean then you need to have a big rethink about your whole life as I don't see how anything good can be built on that base.

PS I don;t mean sparkly clean, dust free. I mean as OP has described - basic cleanliness...no rotting food and dirty plates out, no actual pieces of dirt and crumbs on furnishings or bathroom fittings etc

A 'clean house' is subjective. Everyone has different ideas of what is ok and what is not. I think I do all the things you describe OP - I hate a dirty loo in particular but my boyfriend thinks my house is a tip because I'm not able to keep it like his parent's. When I saw photos of their house I soon realised why - it is better than a 5* hotel and who can live up to that??! So for him the house is 'dirty' if toys are out or if anything is out of place. I say, no the house is not dirty if hoovering/wiping/bleaching is done even if some items are out. We have had to learn to accept we don't see it the same way.

I think though that generally, YABU because true friends don't judge their friend's houses.

What is heaven's name is a 'poo crumb' anyway?? A skid mark? (ewww)

I always do a spot of cleaning when I visit someone's house. On the QT.
I actually carry a few wipes so as to give their bathrooms a bit of elbow grease. Sometimes I offer to do a bit of gardening. Or help with the laundry, folding it/ taking it off the line.
Am awaiting returns!

My house isn't spotless, we get a lot of dust blown in and the windows need a specialist water hose clean as we can't get to the outsides. So wet dusting is quite a job every week: sometimes it's every two weeks before we get around to it.

My bathrooms and kitchen are tidy and super clean if I have enough sleep, and have enough time, otherwise they are just clean. I clean then everyday as I finish using them.
The rest of the house gets a Hoover and tidy once a week. Maybe twice if DH has time.

Sometimes people are untidy rather than unclean- it's like a dyslexia thing- some people are able to organise clutter, some are not. If there are untidy people, there usually is too much clutter to clean.

OP when I had toddlers, we spent my time off out in the parks, and on the floor playing with them. While I fully appreciate cleaning can be an OCD obsession with trying to control your life and surroundings in a world gone mad, maybe you need to chill a bit, maybe enjoy your toddler. There's not much fun to be had looking at someone scrubbing the floor. (Btw how do ou stop them 'helping' - do you have a playpen!)

i am also amazed that ISBN is 20 months, nicklebabe, I was so glad you got your home birth. (Was underbeneathsies).

I grew up in a messy house. My mom is a regular person's version of tidy, but my dad is not. Because my dad never saw a mess, neither did my brother nor I. So, housework was usually left all to Mom, who didn't actually want to do it and got upset that we never offered to help. After awhile, she would get sick of yelling at all of us and give up. And then, we got a dog.

My own house is much neater, usually, than the one I grew up in. Moving out and living with flatmates as a young adult made me more aware of keeping common rooms neat. Having a serious boyfriend over made me more aware of keeping my bedroom in reasonable condition. Moving several times over the last five or so years made me more brutal about getting rid of accumulated stuff.

But the real reason my house is generally tidy is because I have a tidy husband. He doesn't leave it all to me to do. Our tolerance for mess is roughly the same, and if one of us is not up for it, the other one usually is. We established a no-martyr rule before we moved in together - no one is allowed to flap around screeching "I shouldn't have to ask". We just ask for help with chores when we need it and expect to receive that help without an argument.

We are both a bit lazy about hoovering. The hoover is heavy, difficult to store away and bit broken in places. I really want a newer, lighter one.

Agree OP. I don't get a slovenly home. I am not a bitch, I just hate mess, clutter and dirt. Can't function at all if things aren't reasonably tidy and clean.

I suppose that sliding scale is part of the problem the OP is having, the only people I know that hoik bosoms and judge are the MIL-types, for whom dusty bookshelves, heaps of 'stuff' and crumples are an outrage.
So when you post 'basic state of cleanliness' I'm hearing Penelope Keith in 'The Good Life'