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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder why people can't keep their houses in a basic state of cleanliness?

526 replies

HarderToKidnap · 16/09/2013 12:26

Disabilities aside, why can't people keep their homes basically clean?

I work part time, have a messy dog, a demanding toddler, am extremely lazy but my house always looks OK. You couldn't eat your tea off the top of the door frames but the kitchen surfaces are clean, floors hoovered, sofas plumped and inviting, toilet free of poo crumbs. It's easy and doesn't take long. So WHY do I go round to so many of my friend's houses and see they live in complete pits? Gritty nasty sofas that are horrible to sit on, filthy kitchens, poo smears and crumbs all over toilet, minging hand towels, floors covered in bits. IT IS NOT HARD to do the basics. I've just done a house once over and it's taken 45 minutes.

I understand not wanting to spend all day dusting your books or whatever but when people are coming over why wouldn't you want them to feel clean and comfy in your house? I'm not talking about people that physically can't do it because of illness or disability, but the rest of you? WHY??!!!

OP posts:
SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 16/09/2013 12:35

Fur coat and no knickers Grin I see this said on here but I actually have no idea what it means. It just sounds funny

aturtlenamedmack · 16/09/2013 12:35

Well done!
Serious question - what is your toddler doing while you clean? Because mine is following me round the house and leaving a trail of destruction. restrictions I've finished I have to start again Grin

Original poster
HarderToKidnap · 16/09/2013 12:36

If I can walk around in my socks without getting a footful of grit, sit happily on sofa, have a wee without someone's poo smears going on my bum and confidently accept a cup of tea knowing its not from a mouldy cup then I am happy and non judgemental. If any of the above cannot be met, then I just don't understand.

OP posts:
Fuzzysnout · 16/09/2013 12:36

Why do all your friends have crumbly poo? That would concern me more. You need some naicer friends.

at kaosak. Hope she doesn't have crumbly poo!

We'll all pop round to yours OP.

Thurlow · 16/09/2013 12:37

Because they don't care?

My floor needs hoovering a hell of a lot more regularly than it gets. With two parents working f/t and a toddler, most of the time we're too knackered at the end of the day to do it. No one is crawling on the floor anymore, so.... meh.

PresidentServalan · 16/09/2013 12:37

OP - you are obviously a complete superstar whilst all of your friends are scummy Hmm

Do your friends realise that you are judging their homes when you go there. I am guessing not. You do know that you sound unbearably smug, don't you?

EmeraldJeanie · 16/09/2013 12:37

So I am flustered, flappy and a scruffy, dirty sod.
Mmm- suppose if the cap fits..
Never mind...

SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 16/09/2013 12:37

have a wee without someone's poo smears going on my bum you do know you aren't meant to sit in the toilet bowl dont you?

Grin
ArbitraryUsername · 16/09/2013 12:37

I have never in my life plumped a cushion, and I'm not about to start now.

Tee2072 · 16/09/2013 12:38

If I didn't do it, it would because I don't give a flying fuck what you or any other judgemental fucker thinks about my house. As it is my house is untidy but clean enough.

Do your friends know you're such a cow? Perhaps you should tell them you think they are pigs and you can't be friends any more.

Twitterqueen · 16/09/2013 12:38

Because I'm a single mother with 3 DDs and a dog and I work full time and quite frankly, life is too short for me to spend it worrying about whether or not I meet your cleanliness standards.

I clean my house when I feel like it. Mostly I don't. because I prefer a good walk, a glass of wine and talking to my DDs.

Nancy66 · 16/09/2013 12:38

There are lots of people for whom it just isn't a big deal.

I'm always amazed to go to someone's house and they've made no effort at all to tidy it up for guests - but, equally, I am quite envious of people that can do this.

I will always hoover and tidy before anybody visits.

givemeaboost · 16/09/2013 12:38

YABU, lots of people work/have multiple commitments/lack of time/ lack of enthusiasm (ie for me caused by when the kids undo your hard work in 20mins flat) and as others have said once it gets to a certain point it seems overwhelming.

Tee2072 · 16/09/2013 12:38

Actually, AU, I am not even sure how to plump a cushion.

SilverApples · 16/09/2013 12:39

Fur coat and no knickers is an expression my Scottish father uses to describe those who look fab on the outside but it's a sham.
Often used to describe the residents of Edinburgh by others. Grin

IwishIwasmoreorganised · 16/09/2013 12:39

Judgey?! Much? And yes, YABU.

What's acceptable to one person is different to what another is happy with - nothing wrong with that.

I'm assuming that when you visit your friends you manage to keep your opinions to yourself?

I've cleaned both bathrooms, the kitchen and hoovered downstairs so far today. I'm no domestic goddess but it's taken me far longer than your 45 minutes and I haven't done upstairs yet or mopped the downstairs floors, cleaned any windows, mirrors etc.

Pass your gold medal over, you'd be doing well to get a bronze Wink

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie · 16/09/2013 12:39

I have been cleaning since 10.00 this morning and I've only JUST finished the lower floor. I have to hoover the stairs, clean the bathroom, hoover the bedrooms (four of them) and hoover the office....I also have to tidy the deck as DH has left his tools out and their is wood dust all over it.

In 45 mins you can't have cleaned, hoovered and tidied an entire house! I have cleaned the French windows too...

TooTabooToBoo · 16/09/2013 12:39

If you come to my house during the day, you would think I couldn't give a crap - it's untidy and messy.

Come at 8pm after the children are in bed, I've cleaned and put the laundry away (and have my Camomile Yankee candle burning) and it looks like a show house.

Unfortunately, nobody but me sees it like this.

I do not have poo crumbs though - that is just disgusting!

Original poster
HarderToKidnap · 16/09/2013 12:39

Yes, it's only been given a show clean today. I.e. poo pick in garden, toilet and sink cleaners, kitchen surfaces cleaned and everywhere hoovered. My toddler is asleep so I've been uninterrupted. When I clean when he is awake he helps by emptying all the drawers, rubbing his hands on the glass wardrobes and eating stray dog hairs.

OP posts:
Onesleeptillwembley · 16/09/2013 12:39

SP it means all show and no substance, trying desperately to be something you're not (or, as in the OP,s case, not realising you're not ie boasting about how little time housework takes, when it shows she's not cleaning properly).

pianodoodle · 16/09/2013 12:40

Dirt and mess make me anxious - I am a bit of a clean freak and keep the house accordingly.

But... I don't really care how others keep their houses as long as mine is the way I like it :)

Scholes34 · 16/09/2013 12:40

When my house has been tidied, the DCs always ask "Is someone coming round?"

SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 16/09/2013 12:40

scholes Grin

SoonToBeSix · 16/09/2013 12:40

So op you only work part time and have just one child ........

MarianneEnjolras · 16/09/2013 12:40

And I grew up in a house that would make Kim and Aggie faint. Maybe that's why I'm not too bothered? The fact that my floors actually get hoovered and the bathroom is at least the colour it's supposed to be is a huge improvement on how I grew up. If I could live in a mess like that and survive then a few crumbs in the kitchen won't hurt me.