To think that an uncle IS a close relative?

[Watto1]

My uncle sadly passed away a few days ago. His funeral is on Thursday next week. My boss says that I can't have compassionate leave to go to his funeral as compassionate leave is 'for close relatives only.'

I will be going regardless, using my annual leave rather than compassionate leave, but AIBU to think that an uncle should be considered a close relative?

My friend was denied CL for her DFIL of 30 plus years. That was NHS. There simply has to be some flexibility and humanity shown in these situations.

tbh it depends on everything. culture , religion , family etc
universally an aunt or uncle is comsidered a close relative. tbh how is it not . wjen u think of a distant relative u think 2nd/3rd cousin and further

Sorry for your loss.

I have no aunts and uncles but my Godparents are like family, almost second parents. I dread them dying for this exact reason I would be devastated.

I think the company should use their discretion, people dont go to funerals for fun.

I've never wol4ed any where where Uncle would have been automatically included on the compassionate leave list. Spouse, parent child was it. (That's int he oh so caring charity sector).

I had to go back to work for two days between the death of my father and his funeral, which was a week later (and 250 miles away)

Zombie 🧟‍♀️ thread

lol yh it seems to bother me as an aunty or uncle is a close relative in my honest opinion

Our policy leaves it to managers' discretion. I don't agree that there should be a set number of days you can take as you like - this is not the point of compassionate leave.

I have been given compassionate leave for an uncle's funeral - I felt slightly awkward asking as it was my first day back from annual leave and I thought it might look like I was taking the Mick, but my manager was fine with it. I asked for the day off for my husband's grandfather's memorial - I didn't specify compassionate leave, would have been happy to take a/l, but was recorded as compassionate leave.

Excusing the zombie thread

What sick bastard lies about someone's death
You reminded me a a guy I went to Uni with he must have lost 5 maybe 6 Grannies in 4 years. That's the reason employers tend to have rules.

That said my employer was fab dealing with various funerals and sick children in my family.

im sorry but i think therrs a difference beteeen immediate and close. immediate is like u said parents,sibs,children and spouse. one removed such as grandparents ,aunties and uncles and probably first cousins is close family . it is quite odd to consider an uncle distsnt as be is quite close in a family tree.

its quite hilarious really .

im trying to say an uncle is a closr blood relative. some people are not close to their uncles and then theres others who are extremely close. it may be subjective but if you look at it from a genetic perspective an Uncle is close

no its not unreasonable as an uncle is a close relative. why cant they use the term immediate,instead of close .

I used to work for the Civil Service and I think they had a definition for 'close relative' - and an uncle was not one.
It's not how 'close' you are to them - more the blood line.
Sorry for your loss.

exactly an uncle in terms of bloodline is close but i think employers do sometimes exclude a relative such as uncle as it can get out of hand when it comes to bereavement leaves and stuff. its silly really

I guess there has to be a line drawn somewhere. I have dozens of uncles, aunts, cousins, nieces, nephews, and not sure it would be appropriate for any company to be so flexible with compassionate leave tbh.

fair enough but the term"immediate " should be used instead of "close". uncles and aunts(blood) are close relatives

I’m much closer to my uncle than my (now estranged) father.

As previous posters have said, from an employer's point of view, parents and grandparents are a controlled quantity, uncles are not. It's not about DNA or 'closeness' as such.

yh i get that . i know its not technically from a DNA or relatedness perspective . we mostly have 4 grandparents, 2 parents and few siblings. whereas aunts and uncles can be something like 10 or more from both sides of your family. But its quite harsh as biologically an Uncle is a close relative .

Generally compassionate leave isn't granted for a uncle or aunt, but is granted for child or parent. I wouldn't have asked, I would have just taken leave and explained why I hadn't given notice.

I had this when I was younger. I was called at work to say that my Grandfather had died. I was upset and sent to Personnel. I was crying and she was like 'you really are upset aren’t you'. No shit Sherlock I asked about the funeral but would not be given time off. He was not 'close' enough family. I blame all those people over the years who 'killed' off relatives to get a free day off

Compassionate leave should be automatic but unpaid.

your point is silly. what u stated is immediate family not close. Are u seriously saying nephews and nieces are distant. i dont think it works like that you have dozens of relatives and your nephews and nieces are quite close in thr family tree. i mean they are your own siblings children for Gods sakes. close relatives are upto 1st cousins imo. anyone after that it would be reasonable to consider them distant. its kinda silly to say a nephew or niece is distant in all fairness

Sadly wherever a line is drawn someone is on the 'wrong' side of it, it's the nature of things.

It depends on your relationship. A colleague was raised by her Aunt after her DM died but wasn't adopted. The Aunt was much more than an aunt and yet because of the rules she didn't have anywhere near enough time off. It's cruel