To not want my ILs to just walk in?

[CoolaSchmoola]

My DH is currently away with work, and I am at home with DD. I always keep my front door locked when I am in the house. Today my Dad was coming to take us out to lunch and just before he was due to arrive DD needed changing so I rang him and told him I would be upstairs, and had unlocked the door so he could let himself in when he arrived.

DD and I are in her bedroom and I hear noises from downstairs. So I shout "Hello?!" - no reply, just more noises, including one which sounded like the kettle.

At this point I get a bit nervy as on other occasions when I have told my Dad to let himself in he has always shouted "hello!" when he arrives. This may sound like I'm a bit of a worrier - in my defence my next door neighbour had a walk in burglary whilst she was in the house recently, so there is a reason why I get a touch nervous when I hear noises in my house.

So I shouted "Hello?!" again, followed by "Dad?!" and the reply was "No, it's us." - my MIL, and then I heard cups being taken off the dresser. I was really pissed off because I'd been starting to get quite worried and annoyed that apparently they were staying for a drink without actually asking if it was convenient.

I had no idea they were coming over so wasn't expecting anyone but my Dad - if they had phoned first I would have told them I was going out and not to come.

AIBU to not want them to just walk in and put the kettle on?

Nope Tamburlaine.

Do they normally pop round unannounced?

Yanbu I do not have a clue where my phone found that word

. I googled it because I though what the hell does that mean.

You're going all Theatrical on us!

I wouldn't like it, but someone else will come along in a bit and make a big deal out of how your dad was about to just walk in whilst failing to notice that you had phoned him and asked him to so he had consent.

Yanbu

YANBU

What did they say when you told them you were going out?

YANBU.

Tamburlaine has made my night

Tyler - they have been known to and it really bugs me when they do, but generally only when DH is home, and as the door is kept locked they've never just walked in before. (I'm now thinking they must try the door handle EVERY time they come though, or why do it today?)

Sock - yup, waiting on that post now lol!

Nanny - not very much, but there was a distinct cat's bum mouth and a sniffy "Oh....." as if I'd deliberately arranged it to annoy them, which, if I was psychic I may have, but as I'm not I didn't.

YANBU I have this all the time if I don't lock the door, I'm also expected to drop plans at a moments notice if PIL turn up! I suggest you nip this in the bud now!!!

YANBU, I would hate this. It's my house and I find it rude. Oversteps the mark.

YANBU in the general case, however you're being pretty U on what was a simple misunderstanding:

"I've left the door open to let yourself in"

Is what you said you said to them, so they let themselves in as invited, sounds like they took it to mean you would be occupied so not able to entertain them so got on with doing it themselves, whereas you thought they would still say hello etc.

She told her dad to key himself in, not them!

Let

They knew DH was away but strolled in and started a brew? Nice. They extend a similar Open House, make-yourself-at-home policy to you too I take it?

Her Dad was expected not her MIL + SIL, FredFredGeorge.

YANBU at all, get your dh to let them know its not on

Lock your door at all times, with the key in the back of the door.

You should have said something about how frightened you were. Can you knock next time please.

I had ils who would try to let themselves in or peer through the frigging window. So rude.

My mum helps out caring for DD2 one or two days per week. If she knows I am in she doesn't use her key, she knocks. If only DH is in, she tends to use the key because he is a lazy arse and always in bed at odd times works shifts.

Stick a chain lock on the door if possible so they would have to ring the door bell or knock on the door before letting themselves in.

Alternatively do the same to them just to make them feel uncomfortable.

Some people massively missing the point here. Op does keep her door locked, the PIL's can't normally just waltz in, so why advise her to lock her door? They took advantage of the door being unlocked for a short period of time to allow her Dad to let himself in by previous arrangement.
Op, yes, they obviously do try every time they visit. I think you need to "woman up" and just tell them that you would prefer that they ring the bell and wait in future. Tell them that you would have been very upset if you'd wandered down in your undies not realising they were there. If need be, tell them you are entitled to privacy.

YANBU. Not only did they just let themselves im but they didn't even shout a hello, they just went rummaging in your kitchen. That is incredibly rude.

YANBU I must admit I keep my door locked specifically to keep out the PIL who tend to let themselves in - they do shout hello though and linger taking shoes off etc so I can "ready" myself.

In their favour they expect us to just let ourselves into their house and help ourselves to cuppas/snacks etc, so in their mind it is normal - maybe your PIL are the same?

PIL were very surprised when I handed their key back after we had stayed with them for a bit! They wanted me to keep it so I could let myself in any time I was passing!

YANBU. You shouldn't even have to have your door locked. They shouldn't be wandering into your house willy nilly.

The only way to sort this is to say to them straight out, 'Don't just come into my house without knocking first please'

No explanations, no locks or chains or strategys, just tell them. And boobytrap the door if they persist

So your day's allowed to let himself in, but your partner's parents aren't. Right.