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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be bloody pissed off that the CSA...

208 replies

fanjangolo · 28/08/2013 21:31

take child tax credits from one set of children living with the Non resident parent, to give to their other child regardless of the resident parents income.

Child Tax Credits are given to lift children out of poverty and then the CSA take them, shoving them back into poverty - even if the child they are giving this money to lives in a wealthy household.

OP posts:
Original poster
fanjangolo · 28/08/2013 23:38

Broken, she was actually not ever interested in a relationship with him and from the offset did not want him involved. When he and I reconciled the child was a few months old and he had not seen the mother since she was a few months pregnant. She 'disappeared' until she filed a claim for maintenance through CSA.

Stephen, what is 'eeeeeew' the fact that I had sex with two different men without condoms. Or the fact that they themselves didn't request to use condoms even though I had told them I was on the pill?

OP posts:
Cravey · 28/08/2013 23:38

He has a child with someone else. He has a moral and legal obligation to provide for tha child. I don't get your point tbh.

IneedAsockamnesty · 28/08/2013 23:39

Anita if the nrp was really that bothered by it then he could very easily do something about it.

Caoilainn · 28/08/2013 23:39

Glad you were checked fan, I also get that you and your kids shouldn't suffer for DP's reluctance to use birth control.

He is also a parent to your children, is there a reason you are stressing and dealing with the issues involving children you didn't make and not him?

As far as I know tax credits are only used if a parent is biologically responsible for all children. Glad you have looked at options, tax credits usually sort it out.

I really it works out for you op, but i also hope that you include extra child, not their fault & they have you, your dh and siblings they can enjoy if everyone can agree Flowers

Cravey · 28/08/2013 23:39

Also have you ever thought you may not be getting the full story ? Who says she disappeared ?

StephenFrySaidSo · 28/08/2013 23:42

this is one of the reasons i think there should be a national minimum (like they have national minimum wage) amount payable by NRPs regardless of income and treated like a proper debt if they don't pay it. then a percentage of any income you earn above a certain threshold. and NOT subject to reduction if they have more/other children. so for example if someone has a child they pay (for the sake of argument) £25 a week and they know that if they have 10 more children they will have to pay £25 for each of them per week.

Original poster
fanjangolo · 28/08/2013 23:43

Sock, I don't want to give you the exact figures. But you can work out the difference actually without my exact financial details.

The basic rate applies at £200 per week income.

Full child tax credit for two kids is about £115 a week.
So say an NRP was earning the above, that's £315 they would count as their income altogether.

If you go onto CSA CALCULATOR (google it) you can work out what the RP would receive with/without the NRP's other children causing a reduction on the maintenance and what the NRP is losing in CTC and compare the two.

OP posts:
StephenFrySaidSo · 28/08/2013 23:43

the fact that you have unprotected sex with several different people is eww. did you all get tested before you had sex?

jacks365 · 28/08/2013 23:43

Because your dh is on a low income he qualifies for ctc for the children who live with him. Because he has children living with him he pays a reduced amount of maintenance. can you not see that your dh would benefit twice from your children if ctc were not taken into account.

BrokenSunglasses · 28/08/2013 23:44

The other parent doesn't necessarily get CTCs for their children. I don't. Either way, my ex owes a fair share of what it takes to bring up our child.

Child tax credits are an income supplement for someone that has to provide for children. It is intended to help them with general costs associated with having a child, the parent still has a responsibility to provide, or at least contribute to their child's school uniform. If they got the same amount of money in earned income as they do through claiming CTCs, they would still have to pay the same.

Original poster
fanjangolo · 28/08/2013 23:45

Sock have you read my previous comments?! DH is seeking advice on representing himself in court for access to his other child since legal aid stopped for family matters and along with it the services from his solicitor which he had sought to try and gain access to the child.

OP posts:
Turniptwirl · 28/08/2013 23:46

I hope you've all been tested! Condoms prevent more than just pregnancy you know

Squabbling over a £ or two isn't going to help DH get access to his dc.

Original poster
fanjangolo · 28/08/2013 23:48

Stephen - 2 people. in the space of a year. Who I knew within my circle of friends and had a pretty good idea of their recent sexual history.One of them had had a very recent STI check up, the other had not but had just got out of a long term relationship. Small town its all a bit incestuous. But yes i get your point, its irresponsible.

OP posts:
jacks365 · 28/08/2013 23:48

Fan when did your husband first contact his solicitor about this?

Original poster
fanjangolo · 28/08/2013 23:48

Yes jacks having worked it out I can see that now.

OP posts:
needaholidaynow · 28/08/2013 23:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
fanjangolo · 28/08/2013 23:51

jacks when the child was born, he 'heard through the grapevine'...he contacted his solicitor within a month and was entitled to legal aid. She did not respond. He was intending on taking her to court. Legal aid has stopped.

OP posts:
StephenFrySaidSo · 28/08/2013 23:51

you don't know their sexual history- you really don't- you only know what they're happy to tell you, but what you also don't know is the sexual history of all the people they slept with and if they're happy to have unprotected sex with you then you can bet your ass they were having UP sex with the others. it really is a massive risk to take just having UP sex with ONE person just once unless you have a completely up to date STI check for both of you and neither of you has slept with anyone since the text happened. condoms condoms condoms! they're FREE from GUM clinics, family planning (or whatever it's called now) clinics.

needaholidaynow · 28/08/2013 23:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StephenFrySaidSo · 28/08/2013 23:52

and it wasn't just two men, it was also your DH who had been having UP sex with another woman who also has UP sex.

Original poster
fanjangolo · 28/08/2013 23:53

Stephen i totally agree with you regarding the national minimum.

OP posts:
StephenFrySaidSo · 28/08/2013 23:53

but i'm glad you both have the all clear. Smile

jacks365 · 28/08/2013 23:54

Since he had already retained the solicitors services legal aid would have continued. It only stopped for new cases not existing ones. There is no reason your dh couldn't have continued with the solicitor.

Original poster
fanjangolo · 28/08/2013 23:57

needaholiday I agree 100%, what is the point in making a deduction in maintenance due to resident children, then taking the tax credits of resident children to make up for it. It seems bonkers and winds both parties up no end when in actual fact it's only a £1 difference a week. It's a £1 a week that the RP loses out on due to NRP having other children they live with.

OP posts:
Original poster
fanjangolo · 28/08/2013 23:59

He stopped dealings with the solicitor when she was not responding. He then decided to take her to try again and hopefully take her to court only to be told that govt had stopped funding in family matters. He should never have stopped in first place.

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