To be absolutely sick of being the local unpaid childminder?

[gertrudetrain]

I suspect I might be ranting because the 5 day course of antibiotics I've just had have given me raging thrush, the abscess that I was taking them for has flared up the day after finishing the course and my temp is rising by the minute but grrrr.

I currently have 2 different sibling sets in my house, who were waiting outside for ds1&2 when I got home from work at 4. I have just been informed from 1 set that their mum has 'popped out' and their dad has gone to footy. The second set are pretty much left to their own devices and their cheeky fecker of a mum has said in the past 'I trust you with them as I know you are advanced CRB and police checked' because of my job. I have been at work all day, I'm making tea for my 3 dc's and they are doing my head in. I'm just that you would ship your kids off for over 2 hours and 1. Not check on them and 2. Go out! Eldest is 10, youngest 4. AIBU & miserable or are they taking the piss

worra I said yes when I knew they couldn't go home. Really you think its reasonable to dump your kids in someone without checking then go to the supermarket? Really. And you think I'm UR for being annoyed and concerned. Staggering.

Have I said that?

What I'm saying is this woman hasn't dumped her kids on anyone. You invited them in to your home.

She left her 10yr olds playing in the street, making sure they have a mobile phone...and then went food shopping for a couple of hours.

It sounds as though she was quite happy for them to play in the street.

OP, I feel your pain. This happens round my way too. One mother in particular has a 4 & 6 year old who chucks them out all day with minimal checking. They return home for lunch (my immediate neighbours and i have all wisened up!) but they are out of her sight when round the corner playing and she is happy to leave them for up to 4 hours only checking once in that time.

I have really hardened up this summer & don't feed them, patch them up when fallen - although do make sure they get home ok (they are very accident prone) and I no longer chastise them for crossing the small road without looking - i have shared this concern with the parents and they do not seem to think its a problem. Out of sight out of mind. They are not my responsibility unless mum texts or asks me specifically to look after them for a specified time. I make sure to hand them back properly at their house and leave.

You really need to stand your ground - there are many pisstakers out there.

I am looking forward to the winter when I can shut the door and say we are busy, rather than them appearing to play in the close vicinity.

The mum hadn't taken reasonable care to leave her kids in the care of a responsible adult . You came home to find them on your doorstep! What if you hadn't come home?

The kids were playing out in the street with their parents permission

If the OP hadn't have come home, I expect the kids would have continued to play in the street.

Agree with Worra here.

From what i understand, Mum and Dad went out leaving 10yo kids, with mobiles, playing in the street. Kids get bored and go over to OPs house. OPs dc invite them in to play. Mum calls one to check if they're okay. They say 'yeah, all fine, we're at x's house'. Mum says, 'oh okay, as long as you're fine (and their mum is fine with it as you were invited in) then i'll do a bit more shopping and pick you up at 7.30' they say great. Then arrives to pick them and OP says 'don't leave your kids at my house'. My response would also be i think too.

You may not agree that leaving 2 10yos in the street is fine, but that isn't your decision. She may have been longer because she called and knew they were at yours - thinking it was fine. Is it illegal to leave children that age alone? I genuinely have no idea. I wouldn't do it. But it was perfectly normal when i grew up.

No it's not illegal

Same as it's not illegal to let your 4yr old and 6yr old play in the street

There is no minimum legal age to leave kids alone, a parent may have to explain to the police however why they felt a child was old enough to be left alone if someone else reported them.
Kids in my street may be playing out whilst their parents are shopping. I still don't invite them into my house, if I thought a child was suffering and no adult was available I'd phone the police.
It doesn't sound as though the children here were at any real risk though, they just weren't looked after in the way the OP looked after her kids. That doesn't mean they become her responsibility. Either leave them outside to wait for their parents or phone the police, or tell the kids to phone their parents and tell them to pick them up before you phone the police.
If you had been out doing stuff or at work then you wouldn't have been aware the kids were hanging around waiting for their parents anyway.

My mum used to do this (unpaid childcare for neighbours). A neighbour would leave her two daughters (4 and 8) on their own and go to work leaving them with a can of tuna for lunch. My mum used to take the girls, feed them, comb their hair (they had nits), etc. Never got a thank you. But she always enjoyed it and wished she could have more children.

You don't enjoy it, so you should do something about it.

Unfortunately some parents think it is acceptable to leave their children unattended and don't expect other parents to feel a responsibilty when the children need attention or help.

I have to say that I would not have left either of my children for 2 hours at 10 years old so understand your concern. We did once live near a family where both parents had excellent jobs and left their 7 yr old in the care of his teenage brother but brother was in bed until afternoon then out with friends so the poor child was as good as abandoned. She was very when people mentioned it to her.