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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be absolutely sick of being the local unpaid childminder?

109 replies

gertrudetrain · 21/08/2013 18:29

I suspect I might be ranting because the 5 day course of antibiotics I've just had have given me raging thrush, the abscess that I was taking them for has flared up the day after finishing the course and my temp is rising by the minute but grrrr.

I currently have 2 different sibling sets in my house, who were waiting outside for ds1&2 when I got home from work at 4. I have just been informed from 1 set that their mum has 'popped out' and their dad has gone to footy. The second set are pretty much left to their own devices and their cheeky fecker of a mum has said in the past 'I trust you with them as I know you are advanced CRB and police checked' because of my job. I have been at work all day, I'm making tea for my 3 dc's and they are doing my head in. I'm just Hmm that you would ship your kids off for over 2 hours and 1. Not check on them and 2. Go out! Eldest is 10, youngest 4. AIBU & miserable or are they taking the piss

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 21/08/2013 19:46

What Worral said. With bells on.

And I would get SS involved on anyone who left their home and left a 4 and 6-year-old completely unsupervised. I'd call the police, tbh.

Helpwithherson · 21/08/2013 19:46

wow, eager to hear what has happened! Good luck OP!

expatinscotland · 21/08/2013 19:49

'i think its easy to say send them away, don't let them in but if something awful did happen, wouldn't you feel terrible that you'd let them go without passing them over to an adult?'

Then ring the police. That is too young for children to be left on their own.

Sidge · 21/08/2013 19:49

I would call the mum and say "If you are not here in 15 minutes I will call the police and tell them you have abandoned your children."

Then do it.

People only take the piss if you allow them to.

CruCru · 21/08/2013 19:50

So what happened OP?

waltzingmathilda · 21/08/2013 19:52

BTW I work for children's social care so I'm in a pickle about it.

Really? you are too inept to phone a number, which you must have on speed dial and stop having advantage taken? Because I bloody well would

Bumblebee333 · 21/08/2013 19:54

I would have taken them in too.

PAsSweetOrangeLurve · 21/08/2013 19:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PAsSweetOrangeLurve · 21/08/2013 19:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Moxiegirl · 21/08/2013 19:55

Let us know what the mum says!

Twiddlebum · 21/08/2013 19:57

Give her an invoice for your childminding services!

youarewinning · 21/08/2013 19:58

I think OP is getting at the children were left by their parents who went out and told to go to OP's house. So either she said no knowing they wouldn't be supervised or invited them in. Because of her role she feels turfing them out is counterproductive to what her job role stands for. The 4 and 6 yo were sent away but kept coming back in. In which case I agree lock the door.

OP YANBU - let us know how the conversation went.

BramshawHill · 21/08/2013 20:00

Expat - oh i absolutely agree but a couple posters are suggesting she literally turn them away and shut the door. If she stands in the doorway and calls police/social services then waits with the kids until they arrive, fine but i don't think i could send them on their way, knowing their parents aren't around and not spare them another thought maybe I'm as much of a pushover as OP!

Snazzyenjoyingsummer · 21/08/2013 20:02

I like Sidge's idea. And 'popping out' does not cover a two hour absence including a supermarket trip.

Snazzyenjoyingsummer · 21/08/2013 20:03

But I too can see why you find it hard to physically shut them out, OP. You do need to tackle this with the parents now though.

thebody · 21/08/2013 20:09

see unless I have read your post the children were outside tour house when you arrived home and you hadn't been asked by the parents to have them.

so why did you let them in?

thebody · 21/08/2013 20:09

see unless I have read your post the children were outside tour house when you arrived home and you hadn't been asked by the parents to have them.

so why did you let them in?

tootiredtothink · 21/08/2013 20:12

Have they been collected yet?

lunar1 · 21/08/2013 20:12

Hope they have been picked up

BuskersCat · 21/08/2013 20:13

What happened?

pigletmania · 21/08/2013 20:14

Omg send them back home, keep doing tat until the parents get the message. That is so rude and cheeky of the parents

NamelessMcNally · 21/08/2013 20:16

How about phoning the parents and saying you are happy to have them. But are charging by the hour as a childminder. Take as long as you like...

Original poster
gertrudetrain · 21/08/2013 20:17

Right that went well, not.

Can I just explain that it was the 10 year old twins whose mum went to the supermarket and dad went to footy. The 4 & 6 year old live round the corner so I watched them over the road when I had had enough and it was ds2&dd's teatine. I sent them to their house where I knew their mum was.

The twins were on the doorstep when we got hone, DS1 invited them in to play a game but I asked them to play out on their bikes. At 5.30 DS1 appeared in the kitchen asking for batteries for his Xbox controller. I said why don'tvyou go to x & x's house and get a spare because we have no batteries. DS1 says they can't because twins dad has gibe to footy and their mum has popped out. Therefore I couldn't kick them out when I didn't know if there was a responsible adult at home. Social care's contact centre would NFA it immediately because their mum had left them in the care of a responsible adult. Even though she hadn't got consent from me she had taken reasonable steps in their eyes to safeguard her dc's.

Her response when I said I would like to know if she wanted me to look after her dc's? 'You weren't looking after them. They had their mobiles and they could have waited on our step.' I have asked her to not send them round again without checking with me first and she just said 'fine' and made a Hmm face.

OP posts:
lagoonhaze · 21/08/2013 20:17

You work in childrens services and you are actually debating what to do?

pigletmania · 21/08/2013 20:18

Send them away if their parents are in, but if parents have gone out and left the children with you, when they return tell them in no uncertain terms that this is not to happen again, if they do you will call th police or ss