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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you leave your baby unattended in their buggy

999 replies

noblegiraffe · 20/08/2013 13:17

...while you use the loo?

On another thread I mentioned not being able to get a buggy into a small cubicle and the suggestion was to leave baby outside.

Would I be overly precious in thinking 'No, I wouldn't do that'?

OP posts:
Original poster
noblegiraffe · 21/08/2013 12:13

I just read that a month ago a 2 year old was taken from a supermarket trolley (abductor was shot dead). Maybe those signs on trolleys aren't so daft.

OP posts:
fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 21/08/2013 12:22

The signs are to avoid kids falling out
Not warning you to be paranoid a nasty man will snatch them

DropYourSword · 21/08/2013 12:24

Hi jacks365 just to clarify I'm not making a comparison between the two in that way. What I was meaning was that many people think there isn't a risk because we aren't aware it has happened before. But if a child did then get taken whilst outside a cubicle I imagine the mother would be in for a barrage of abuse.

pumpkinsweetie · 21/08/2013 12:25

I agree with Drop

HorryIsUpduffed · 21/08/2013 12:26

DM let go of the trolley when DB was in the seat. It tipped over and he still has the scar

jacks365 · 21/08/2013 12:28

I would expect the mother to get sympathy not a barrage of abuse.

Original poster
noblegiraffe · 21/08/2013 12:28

Hmm I know. But if you read this thread you'd think that baby snatching never happened. And it's not the only risk of leaving your baby unattended.

OP posts:
K8Middleton · 21/08/2013 12:33

I think you need a few more facts with that statement nobelgiraffe. Firstly, who was the abductor? Most children that are snatched are taken by a family member. Secondly, where did that occur because we don't shoot unarmed people in this country.

A child in a buggy just outside the loo door for 30 seconds is not unattended.

I really think some of you more hysterical people exaggerate. Do you never leave your child alone in their bedroom to sleep? Do you not leave your child at the end of the aisle in the trolly at the supermarket when it's busy? Do you never leave your child in the buggy at a table in a cafe and nip to get some sugar? Do you never park your child on the bus in the buggy space? Because I see these things routinely (not the sleeping one but you get the drift).

Emilythornesbff · 21/08/2013 12:36

Most children are taken by a family member.
So abduction by a stranger doesn't happen.
It's ok folks. Nothing to worry about. What a relief!

DropYourSword · 21/08/2013 12:36

jacks I would hope she got sympathy, but I wouldn't bet my life on it!

acer12 · 21/08/2013 12:42

It all ways makes me wonder about women that's like to scream and shout that children are perfectly safe. No one going to ever harm/abduct them. I wonder if the children's parents of the children that have been addicted/harmed felt like that.
Yes admittedly it is a small % but I'm not that cocky that I just smugly assume it will never happen to mine.

It' seems like the in trendy thing to mock parents who are concerned about there kids. I don't care if the %
is oooooooo1% I'm not gonna risk my my child. Why on earth would you?????
I would truly love to live in these areas where crime dosnt exist. I think it's called in the landofstickyourheadinthesand or let's be trendyandblamethemediaforeverythingmaaaaaan street.

BlingBang · 21/08/2013 12:42

People that wouldn't have sympathy in that case would be arseholes and therefor don't count.

OP posts:
AlwaysWashing · 21/08/2013 12:47

Emilythornesbff
You make the most sense, I'm with you!
I can count on one hand the number of times I have used a disabled loo since DC were born but have and will again rather than leave them and providing I was not causing distress (pain or embarrassment) to anyone else. I'm pretty sure the loos used were probably dual purpose as they'd have been shopping centres or restaurants.

BlingBang · 21/08/2013 12:48

It says the mother turned her back, nothing could probably stop a craved loon from grabbing a child whether the mother was holding it or whatever. That child wasn't unattended.

MrsHoarder · 21/08/2013 12:49

Acer what is stopping you from peeing with the door open? That's not putting your child out of sight at all.

Ilovemyself · 21/08/2013 12:50

Fanjo. As I have said, every situation is different. And as I said, if I have never caused an issue what is the problem.

If you are not causing anyone an issue what is the problem? I would always make way for someone who needed to toilet.

If there was an issue I would not use the facilities mentioned but if there is not I will use them. Just because there are aeseholes out there that are rude, abusive, and that don't give a damn doesn't mean we are all like that.

I feel bad for your experience at the weekend but I don't not believe I would ever put you in the same position and I would certainly never treat you as some have verbally.

DropYourSword · 21/08/2013 12:51

That child got snatched when it was attended. So I can therefore understand mums concerns about leaving baby unattended, even just for 30 seconds in public ie closed toilet door.

Ilovemyself · 21/08/2013 12:52

Emilythornebff. We agree for once lol.

And always washing. I agree.

I am fine with not using them if there is a problem, but if there is not then why the fuss

acer12 · 21/08/2013 12:52

I did in neros on Monday ! Grin I'm not fussed doin that. But if there was a que, baby was crying, I was bursting that was the only cubicle and it was empty for just incase some one else needed it , of course I'm going to use it.

K8Middleton · 21/08/2013 13:16

Emily how does saying most abductions are by a family member mean "so abductions by a stranger don't happen?"

Do you not understand what the word "most" means? And where has anyone suggested stranger abductions don't happen? I have read most of the thread.

Dawndonnaagain · 21/08/2013 13:21

What some of you seem unable to apppreciate is that your just in case is a disabled persons absolute necessity.

usualsuspect · 21/08/2013 13:22

If a sign on a toilet door says 'Disabled' then I wouldn't use it.

I'm not disabled,therefore I'm not entitled to use it.

It's not hard to understand is it?

K8Middleton · 21/08/2013 13:26

nobel that child was not unattended. Nor was it an attempted abduction but I'm not sure that makes a difference really. So at best... a 1:7 billion instance.

So we still have zero known instances of child abduction while parent has a wee and several known instances of disabled people going through avoidable stress and humiliation due to other people placing their own temporary, minor needs above others who have to live with a disabling condition every single day that mean managing a double buggy and armfuls of shopping can only happen in their dreams.

teacherwith2kids · 21/08/2013 13:26

Those of you who feel the risk of the baby being abducted in a public toilet (many of the ones you have mentioned have been in large shops etc), from a pushchair 6 inches from you and in full hearing - and often in sight of the wheels - in the 30 seconds needed to go to the toilet is so unacceptably large that you will choose instead to use a facility that you are not entitled to use....

Do you drive?

Do you cross the road?

People's perception of risk is SO odd.