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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What's the most pampered/indulged behaviour you've ever seen?

634 replies

ChaosTrulyReigns · 16/08/2013 12:08

When I used to have a proper job Wink, one of my colleagues would phone her mom at the first spit of rain to go and fetch her washing in. This was about 8 miles from the office (so who knew what the weather was like at home?) abd a 4 mile round trip fir the mom and dad (mom didn't drive).

SIOB that the parents would do it!

She once called home and asked her to go and wash up a breakfast bowl as she had run out of time to do it.

Hmm
OP posts:
SinisterSal · 17/08/2013 00:50

i kind of see the appeal of christmas lists tbh - but i suppose it''s the spirit of the thing

TSSDNCOP · 17/08/2013 00:52

My mum had an awful childhood. As a consequence she gave us the best childhood ever, she often went without (I saw her eat bread and jam on nights we had chicken). Now we spoil her rotten, nothing's too much. I'd give the the earth because she's bloody earned it.

ToysRLuv · 17/08/2013 01:02

Most adults I know say that they don't want any presents. Actually got a pact with my family where none of the adults buy each other anything. We've all got what we need and can buy ourselves what we want. However, I still get my DF a bottle of Scotch and mum a box of chocs or fudge. Mum gets me a wall calendar. That's it. We all feel that it's DS's and DN's turn to get the gifts, and we enjoy seeing them happy.

RhondaJean · 17/08/2013 01:05

I would be furious if I didn't g any gifts - I would seriously not be with DH.

Told you I was spoilt...but to me it's not about the actual gifts (though they are lovely and he always has great taste) but about someone taking time to think of me and go and find something for me. That matters to me.

SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 17/08/2013 01:09

This thread has been quite hilarious.

My mum bought me a McDonalds today. Is that indulging me? I could have said no but I didn't and I enjoyed it. I did how ever have to spend time teaching her to use a laptop.

I have never been spoilt. Been the oldest of 7 makes that difficult.

I was doing own washing once I was at high school. After a week or so of me not coming home for tea my mum simply stopped making it and I would have to fend for myself once I came in.

Am I bothered that threesy gets spoilt? No. Why would I be? It doesn't affect me. Just like seeing my friend been spoilt doesn't affect me.

Each to their own I say. If their families are happy to do it then why shouldn't they?

I am very independent but that's not really due to good reasons.

ToysRLuv · 17/08/2013 01:14

I couldn't be friends with anyone like that. You can choose your friends, after all.

I just find the whole "princess" attitude absolutely appalling, infantile and damaging to the feminist cause.

SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 17/08/2013 01:17

Bet my friend been spoilt by her parents doesn't affect me. She knows she wont get shit from me, its just her parents.

It doesn't make her a shit person because of it. Just gives me a laugh now and again with what she tells me. Grin

SinisterSal · 17/08/2013 01:19

maybe if she worked with you or was your flatmate it'd bother you. It would me, that's for sure. Not bitter

SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 17/08/2013 01:21

I have known her since I was 13 and she has been my neighbour for 2 year.

I see her everyday. I do laugh at some of the stuff she says/does and expects from her parents.

My parents would tell me where to go if I asked some of the things she does.

ToysRLuv · 17/08/2013 01:24

Yes, she sounds like a lovely person. An grown woman treating her parents like servants. Totally.

SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 17/08/2013 01:29

Her parents are willing to do it. They seem happy to do it. Why does that matter? Each to their own

ToysRLuv · 17/08/2013 01:33

I assume she expects and demands they do things for her. That fact that they then do them, doesn't make it right. She should be ashamed. Her parents are too nice for their own good.

SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 17/08/2013 01:47

Her parents are willing to do it. They seem happy to do it. Why does that matter? Each to their own

SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 17/08/2013 01:49

They have always been like that. It doesn't affect me so I honestly dont care what they do for her. If they didn't want to they wouldn't. Its got worse as shes currently pregnant but her boyfriend doesn't put up with her shite either.

AaDB · 17/08/2013 07:02

If my dh had a bath ready I'd think he was hinting about personal hygiene. We have a mixer tap, and the bath fills really quickly. I still don't get that running a bath is indulgent. When ds is older, I'm taking the bath out and putting in the best shower I can find.

I went on holiday with a close friend when u was in my early twenties. I was very Shock to find how much of a diva she was. She wanted din cream on her back but couldn't reciprocate because she didn't want to get her hands sticky. She was very fussy about food; she went to McDonalds rather than eat at the hotel.

MrsSchadenfreude · 17/08/2013 07:44

My mother is/was like this. She got worse as she got older, did less and less and expected my DF to do more and more. When he retired, she stopped driving, so he had to drive her to and from work. She used to shout at him to pour her a glass of wine, when she was standing right next to the fridge and he was in the garden (we had a big garden - if he didn't respond quickly enough, she used to ring a bell!). She also used to call for him to dry her when she got out of the bath. Shock

When he died (worn out?) she used to phone me to ask me how to do things - really simple things like how do you use a cashpoint and demand that I come and show her (shouting and crying). I lived in a different country at the time, 4 hours flight away and had a new baby. She then found another man to indulge her - he painted her house, repaved her drive, helped in the garden. He died suddenly too, and all she could say was "Wasn't it lucky that he didn't die here?"

She doesn't have anyone else at the moment to do all of her fetching and carrying, but tries to make me do it when I'm there. She's not incapable at all, just wants someone else to do everything for her. She stands looking helpless at a petrol station and usually someone will come and fill the car for her. She is very definitely one of those "cutesy" women, which is not appealling when you're 80, and will excuse her incapability with life by saying "I's so ickle!" in a little girl voice.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 17/08/2013 07:44

I think it's possible to be spoilt agmumst one's will too..if the other person is determined to do it.

I try to pamper my elderly mum and auntie when they come for dinner but they insist on cleaning my house and folding washing etc.

They are strong willed and I couldn't stop them without wrestling them.

My mum also insists on giving me cash and will not let me refuse. I just spend it on DD. I have more than her and want to give her some.

I do take them for meals as its all they will allow

If I am doing a shop with my mum she will insist on paying for mine which I find embarrassing in front of the check out operator..she even says things like "oh you never stop paying for them"(I am 41 fgs).

Clearly they are wonderful fantastic people but quite domineering and have kept me in teenage role in their heads

I don't like it but couldn't change it without having huge argument with them, plus it seems to make them happy.

So..I would argue that seeming spoilt is sometimes about the spoiler not spoilee. I am no way.smug about it.

By the by..asking if someone has learning difficulties is not a hideous insult unless you think people with them are inferior.

And..the woman who.someone mentioned standing beside hand sanitizer and letting her husband rub it on..screams OCD to me not entitlement. .

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 17/08/2013 07:46

Lol at my Freudian typo 'agmumst my will'

SPBisResisting · 17/08/2013 07:52

"And..the woman who.someone mentioned standing beside hand sanitizer and letting her husband rub it on..screams OCD to me not entitlement. ."

my first thought was arthritis actually - sounds like there could be a few explanations.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 17/08/2013 07:55

Yes, true, I assumed she didn't want to touch the germy pump.

MistressDeeCee · 17/08/2013 08:26

Ive just read thru much of thread and had a good laugh. To those who are pampered well, good luck to you if you can get away with it. It must lead to brain mush at some later stage in life tho, & take a certain personality to live with a person who has so little self worth, s/he will make their life purpose running around after you. I pamper my DP in what (I think!) are normal ways..run his bath, wash his hair, breakfast in bed etc when I feel in the mood to do that. Its nice sometimes. We also have occasional days where he does everything for me, and I him. He pampers me too, in similar ways..this is as and when we feel tho, certainly not daily.

Id feel suffocated and possibly quite irritated by over-pampering. I suppose this sounds horrible to say but Id see a doormat man as weak, and lose all respect for him - & no respect = no love. Still..it takes all sorts as they say. Id raise an eyebrow at the pampered set but it wouldnt bother me seeing it at all - Id just find it funny Smile

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 17/08/2013 08:31

I wish DH would pamper me I tell ya.

Last night he had a few and got soppy..for him..

He said 'you're not bad'.

He doesn't do anything pampering for me.

But is absolutely superb with DD

Greythorne · 17/08/2013 08:45

I would have to have suffered a traumatic brain injury to accept never carrying cash and having others put my docks on for me.

WhoreOfTheWorlds · 17/08/2013 09:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JerseySpud · 17/08/2013 09:21

My parents live on the UK mainland and we live in the channel islands so no spoiling by them. Also when we go and visit i'm expected to wait on them and help with housework etc which i do as we get a holiday without paying accomadation and food so its win win.

As for being spoilt at home i snorted at that. I rarely get a birthday card or present let alone anything done for me. I'm 28 the same age as you Eating and i honestly think DH would drop to the floor and roll around laughing a la Peppa Pig style if i told him he had to do everything for me and treat me like a princess.

As for my 2 dd's DD1 is 6 and she tidies up after herself, helps me cooking dinner and tidies the lounge. She is still my big princess but shes not an entitled brat. DD 2 is 2 and she even puts washing in the basket and rubbish in the bin. I want my girls future partners to treat them well but not to be slaves to them.