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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What's the most pampered/indulged behaviour you've ever seen?

634 replies

ChaosTrulyReigns · 16/08/2013 12:08

When I used to have a proper job Wink, one of my colleagues would phone her mom at the first spit of rain to go and fetch her washing in. This was about 8 miles from the office (so who knew what the weather was like at home?) abd a 4 mile round trip fir the mom and dad (mom didn't drive).

SIOB that the parents would do it!

She once called home and asked her to go and wash up a breakfast bowl as she had run out of time to do it.

Hmm
OP posts:
BeeMom · 16/08/2013 18:09

My daughter is a member of Special Olympics, and one of the members of her gymnastics team is, without a doubt, the most indulged child I have met.

One example (of hundreds) - she was watching tv and saw a mention of the Mall of America. She said she wanted to go there. The following morning, they were boarding a plane and on their way. She dictates where the family travels to during the hold (generally 3 international trips every summer, 2-3 cruises a year and DisneyWorld at Christmas.

She is 16, and has no concept of "no".

pinkyredrose · 16/08/2013 18:09

threesy and eating it's about time you stopped dominating this thread with your own agendas don't you think?

Maybe you should start your own threads about how well you're treated and see how people reply.

HeffalumpTheFlump · 16/08/2013 18:11

Me and dh spoil each other rotten. We love making each other feel special, and will go to great lengths to make each other feel pampered and looked after. It is 100% a two way street, as neither of us would feel comfortable if it was one sided as it would feel like we were using each other.

On another note, my db is utterly spoiled by my mum. He is 26 and still lives at home due to health problems. She does everything for him, washing, cooking, running errands etc. If I go round to theirs or she comes to ours, she tries to spoil me too, but I don't let her as it makes me feel uncomfortable. While my db will demand my mum hurries up with dinner, I would rather help her make it. I don't think he knows how lucky he is!

Tuon · 16/08/2013 18:15

I've found being over indulged the key to a happy marriage. But it goes both ways. I spoil DH and he spoils me, nothing material, we're skint usually. But coming home to a tidy house, being told to sit down and enjoy that wine while I bring you dinner and desert then wash up after is amazing. Nothing like being brought a cup of tea in bed and being told your bath is being run.

He's a SAHD so I make sure I return the favour though. My turn for tea tonight plus an early shift so I was up at 6 setting a chilli away in the slow cooker and I spent my lunch half hour running around M&S for the cake he likes and the wine we love.

We both love being spoilt and as we both take our turn we appreciate the work that goes into giving your partner a relaxing evening in which they have to do absolutely nothing but enjoy themselves.

I recommend giving a try to any couple, one night a week the other takes care of everything, just for one evening.

candycoatedwaterdrops · 16/08/2013 18:21

Those on here who admit they are very pampered by others, I wonder how you'd feel if you truly were unable to do these things. I had an illness that rendered me disabled overnight. Not being able to even get my drink for myself was so demoralising.

EatingAllTheCrumpets · 16/08/2013 18:25

Dominating the thread? I wasn't aware I was. People see my life as very entitled and people in rl have commented on how spoiled I am so I thought I would comment, I wasn't aware it would turn the thread into a completely different direction and I apologise to the OP if I've ruined her thread. Although I'm sure she'd have said something if she felt this way.

When I realised that my post had clearly got people's backs up I responded to try and clarify and explain that the situation is not always as black and white as it may seem at first. I will defend myself and my family when people are posting things that I feel are nasty and un-called for.

raisah · 16/08/2013 18:31

That's why there are so many, rude entitled people in the world. They are spoilt & pampered by their families that they throw hissy fits when their whims aren't catered for by the rest of the world.

My cousin was so spoilt rotten by her dad that she had huge problems when she got married. My uncle got her breakfast ready, washed & ironed her clothes, polished her shoes etc. She didn't know how to make toast, it
was pathetic that she so dependent on others.

pinkyredrose · 16/08/2013 18:33

eating yes you are dominating. The OP didn't start this thread purely for you to justify yourself.

Being a pampered princess this may not have occurred to you.

gordyslovesheep · 16/08/2013 18:38

my friends MIL was a lot like Eating - sadly now at 70+ her husband is no longer there to indulge her, she is alone and practically a prisoner in her own home - she wont go anywhere alone, has no friends and relies on my friend (an hour away and working with 3 small kids) to drive her anywhere

it's horribly sad and she is just so lonely

somewheresomehow · 16/08/2013 18:55

isnt it strange that if this was husbands that were behaving like godawful princesses aka -utter prats- everyone would be absolutely flaming the dw's for pandering to them

Amrapaali · 16/08/2013 18:58

All of you are jealous of threesy and crumpets. Grin

JenaiMorris · 16/08/2013 19:00

My mum used to do mine, ds's and dp's washing Blush

I'd drop it off on the way to work and collect it the following evening. She never ironed it though, the lazy slattern Wink

She also used to clean my flat from top to bottom when we went in our annual holiday and we'd return to a once-a-year-only pristine home with flowers on a freshly clothed kitchen table and sparkling windows.

In my defence she wasn't working and both do and I were both working FT (and didn't have a washing machine). Also I appreciated it hugely and I imagine I'd do the same in her position. Sadly I can't return the favour (s) as she died years ago but fingers crossed I can pass the love on to ds when he's a father

MiddleAgeMiddleEngland · 16/08/2013 19:04

Also ignoring the fighting.

One of my sisters cuts the crusts off her daughters sandwiches which she makes for her every morning. DN is 22, lives a short distance away with her boyfriend. My sister drives the sandwiches to DNs home at 7.30 each morning Shock

My own teenagers are being brought up to be as independent as possible. This doesn't mean ignoring their needs, it means encouraging them to do as much for themselves as they can, knowing that we are there to support them if anything goes wrong.

CatsWearingTutus · 16/08/2013 19:04

An ex colleague of mine was a complete narcissist who somehow had men falling all over her believing her own hype. One day a young man, also a colleague who wasn't rich by any means, asked her out. She replied that she would go out with him but only to the most expensive restaurant in our city. After he spent £500 on dinner she told him she had no intention of it being a date and that she saw him as a friend only. When I questioned her about it she said he had had his money's worth just having a couple of hours in her company and he should be grateful Confused. Granted he was an idiot to go along with it but still.

NaiceHamIsNaice · 16/08/2013 19:07

Tuon "I've found being over indulged the key to a happy marriage."

I think this is bloody good advice actually.
DH and I are really nice to each other - not materially because we are very fortunate and have everything we like but no room for it - so we cook each other's favourite foods and make each other cocktails and plump pillows and run baths and it's lovely. I think it's almost the most positive thing, day-to-day, about our relationship.

Tanith · 16/08/2013 19:10

My ex-next door neighbour used to ring for his dad to come over any time he needed some work done ob his house. His dad was still living in Poland! Completely blew apart the myth that all Polish people are hardworking: he's the most entitled, lazy man I have ever known...

...with one exception. My friend's older brother, who lived at home and whose mother still waited on him hand and foot, even running his baths and washing his hair. He was over 30 at the time!

FrankelInFoal · 16/08/2013 19:12

I just want to ask those of you who admit to running round catering to your child's every whim - do you expect their teachers to do the same? What about when they move away from home/go to Uni, will you continue to run around after them or expect other people to do everything for them?

HappyMummyOfOne · 16/08/2013 19:14

I hope my DS stays single!! I'd be horrified to have a DIL that expected to be waited on hand and foot as she fancies playing princess.

Some of these stories have to be wind ups, surely people have more self respect than that. Can you imagine the children? Their poor teachers and friends.

Whilst the occasional spoiling is nice, day in day out the person having to pamper to another adults every whim must surely one day rebel and realise its not something most adults do.

littlemisswise · 16/08/2013 19:20

I don't know how anyone with an ounce of self respect can allow someone else to put their socks on when they don't need them to, or can go shopping just to tell their DP what they need, then sit back and watch him do everything else.

I can't put my own socks on, but like fuck am I relying on someone else to do it, so I bought an implement to enable me to do it myself.

If DH and I were to go shopping I'd have to tell him what to buy and leave the rest to him, so I do it online and have it delivered. He's not a lapdog and I am not a 'princess'!

Where on earth is people's dignity?

Remotecontrolduck · 16/08/2013 19:21

Before reading this thread, I would have said I have fairly high standards in how I like to be treated (though for me it's definitely a two way thing, I certainly reciprocate by cooking a nice meal, running a bath or taking a partner out etc).

After looking at this thread, I am not indulged in the slightest! Blimey at some of these!

CorrineFoxworth · 16/08/2013 19:23

I had a Princess friend once. She was newly married and I was on my own with a toddler. We arranged to meet for a few drinks one day and I organised childcare. Only a couple of hours and told her when I had to leave by.

She deliberately told me to meet her in town an hour before she wanted to go for a drink because she was getting her nails done. I was expected to use the first hour of my child-free time to keep her company. Then her DH arrived and said, "we're going for a drink after this, would you like to come?", as if it was perfectly normal that I would get childcare so that I could sit with his wife while she got her nails done.

I have many other horror stories and can't believe I ever gave her the time of day!

LRDYaDumayuShtoTiKrasiviy · 16/08/2013 19:24

I don't know if this is indulged behaviour or just badly misjudged, but someone I know invited me to her party and send out a text saying 'the theme is friendship - everyone has to make a mini presentation about friendship to present during the day'. Hmm Confused

Needless to say, I didn't go. She was also in the habit of turning up two hours late to things. She was a fun person but I thought that took the piss quite a bit.

I've heard some brilliant stories from university lecturers/tutors about what people do for their little darlings.

cocolepew · 16/08/2013 19:27

The posters who are indulged don't sound in any way nasty or entitled. There obviously are able to do things by themselves but if their DH or parents want to spoil them, then why not? They aren't sitting screaming at them and throwing shoes ffs.

aladdinsane · 16/08/2013 19:31

i used to work with a woman in her 40's whose aunt would move in to look after her when her mum went on holiday
She worked full time but was very spoilt
They had the same menu every week all crap so eg mon - cornish pasty tues- sausages
She came into work brimming with excitement that her aunt broke from the fixed menu
Her mum died a few years ago and I have always wondered how she coped

Spikeytree · 16/08/2013 19:32

Frankel, indulged children do expect teachers to run around after them in my experience. There are 14 year-olds who couldn't possibly be expected to sharpen the pencil they have borrowed off the teacher because they couldn't be bothered to get their pencil case out of their bag. We also regularly get asked to just 'do it for me' with regards to the actual work. Some kids will hide rubbish on the chair next to them because the bin is five or six steps away from their table. Then on Parents Evening the parents moan that we don't help their little darling enough, or that they only play up because they are bored.