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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if those of you with big babies tore badly?

143 replies

wtfisgoingon · 09/08/2013 07:40

And if you didn't what position were you in?

I have a thread on childbirth but need a bit more traffic to help me come to a decision.

In brief, ds1 8lb 7oz - third degree tear-was lying on my side (all happened quite quickly)

Ds2 was 10lb 11oz - couple of stitches-on my knees leaning on birthing ball.

Current baby growth scan results from last week (38 weeks) showed baby as 11lb. I refused induction and a csection and deferred decision till yesterday.

I asked for another scan yesterday (39 weeks) hoping that last weeks was incorrect. Scan yesterday showed a 12lb baby.

I have booked a csection for Monday as felt under pressure to do so, but I am wondering if this is the right thing to do. I had such wonderful births with the other 2, and never imagined a csection for dc3.

I am concerned about the baby getting stuck, but that can actually happen at any size. I gave birth to a whopper already, am hoping this is a good sign.

Another concern is bad tearing.

Is it inevitable past a certain size? Or, as I am hoping, is it affected by position of mother and baby for birth?

TIA

OP posts:
ChocolateTeacup · 09/08/2013 07:50

DS1 - 8lb 10 - 3rd degree, forceps
DS2 - 10lb 11 - few stiches

I don't think its inevitable, I think a lot of it is how tense the person in labor is and I think its more likely to tear with initial babies as there is more an element of fear of the unknown.

I don't see why you would have to have a c-section but I imagine they may want to monitor you more closely if you don't

jumperooo · 09/08/2013 07:56

7lb 6oz - 4th degree, forceps (induced, back to back, head not engaged)

All my friends with big /bigger babies had minor/no stitches.It depends on the positioning mainly but the consultant told me that generally bigger babies are easier to give birth to, their weight helps push down and thin the cervix or something, gravity etc!

Mrsrobertduvall · 09/08/2013 07:59

Dd 7lbs 6 stitches halore and every oain relief going
Ds 10 ibs 8 nothing at all

Artijoke · 09/08/2013 07:59

9lbs 4oz - induction, forceps, very extensive tearing which left me in pain for months

10lbs 4oz - easy birth just a few stitches

7lbs 14oz - very fast birth, small 2nd degree tear.

DwellsUndertheSink · 09/08/2013 08:00

ive had 3x 9lb'ers and delivered No 2 and 3 without stictches needed - both very fast births. With a skilled midwife, you should be able to deliver without tearing, especially if its your 3rd.

Also, weight scans not that acurate. Baby could be 1.5lbs either way.

Artijoke · 09/08/2013 08:01

Oh and my 7lbs 14oz baby was scanned at 38 weeks and measured at 9lbs. I agreed to induction at 39 weeks and out came my tiniest baby yet.

IfIonlyhadsomesleep · 09/08/2013 08:03

Had a couple of stitches with all three of mine. The last one was my biggest-9lb 8oz, with the quickest birth and least tearing. I don't think it has to do with the size of the baby as much as other factors. I'm no medical professional, but if you had the labour you describe with a big baby for number two, it sounds positive for number three. Shelling peas? Perhaps not, but my body certainly seemed to get the hang of it for numbers two and three.

wtfisgoingon · 09/08/2013 08:03

I am hoping that s

OP posts:
BeaWheesht · 09/08/2013 08:05

My babies were only 8lb 11 and 9lb 4 but had massive heads...

I needed one stitch with each of them, gave birth lying on my back with both of them.

wtfisgoingon · 09/08/2013 08:07

Something may happen this weekend naturally, surely if it is that big then, as mentioned, gravity will mean it should just drop out!

Overdue with ds2 by 16 days, but you never know...
I have a second reflexology session booked for this morning.

In a way I am gutted I even had a growth scan, would have been none the wiser and able to enjoy the last few weeks, as I actually feel really good!

OP posts:
Runningchick123 · 09/08/2013 08:08

First baby 8lb 4ozno stitches, just a few grazes, lying on my back.
Second baby 10lb 1oz no stitches, no grazes, no damage at all, gave birth leaning over the headboard thingy.

javotte · 09/08/2013 08:08

DD2 was 9lbs with a big head. I needed a few stitches.

Ilovegeorgeclooney · 09/08/2013 08:09

Also sometimes a baby is long rather than wide.
DD1 - 9LB 11 - 4 stitches
DS - 10lb 4 - no stitches
DD2 - 11lb -no stitches

DD2 was 4cm longer than DS.

Good luck and enjoy your baby however they arrive!

sillyoldfool · 09/08/2013 08:12

I had a second degree tear with dd2, she was 10lb 3oz, but she was back to back all the way out. I think positioning is way more important than size.

MinnieBar · 09/08/2013 08:14

Aren't growth scans unreliable?? And surely head circumference is more of a factor?

My largest (10lb 11) did least damage - a minor graze that I was never even aware of post-partum. Third baby so perhaps that makes a difference??

Gave birth on knees but leaning forward, if you see what I mean (arms supported on cushions etc).

Good luck!

ClassyAsALannister · 09/08/2013 08:16

I'm fairly certain it's to do with how far you can stretch in relation to how big their head is, not the weight. DS was 9lb 4 & even after an episiotmy I still had a right old time trying to push him out. They didn't expect his head to be as round, even though he was big anyway and a very unhelpful midwife said I should've had a cesearean. Nevermind!

I didn't tear past where I was cut so it could've been worse Smile

Good luck!

Iheartcustardcreams · 09/08/2013 08:17

Ds3 9lb 12. Third degree tear. Born very quickly I was on my knees leaning over the bed.

Jsa1980 · 09/08/2013 08:19

DS 8.8 with a 39 cm head. I'm quite small. Episiestomy with first degree tare But was walking about the same dad and healed fine. Painkillers on day of birth but nothing thereafter.

ILoveAFullFridge · 09/08/2013 08:24

I think mother's position, experience, and state of mind probably of more relevance than baby size. All of mine were large, and each larger than the previous. First birthing I was unconfident and I think poorly supported by the midwife, obeyed her instructions, gave birth on my back, and tore badly. With births 2 and 3 I grew in confidence and belief in my ability to give birth and to insist on the support I needed, and each birth was better than the previous one. For the last one I was upright in water, did not push, and delivered my 11lb-er without tearing. This was after being told by the consultant that I was endangering my baby's health by insisting on a natural birth.

If you've birthed large babies naturally you can do it again. Your body know what to do, and you know what you want or need to help it happen.

Hope it goes well for you, whatever you choose Smile

mezza123 · 09/08/2013 08:29

DS 8lb 6: 2nd degree. On my back
DD 10lb: 2nd degree. On side. Felt a bit worse than with DS but I didn't look at either.
DD blasted out like a bat out of hell so was more worried about prolapse, vag felt funny after (Lots of pressure) but ok now at 5 months.
DD was 98/99 centile for height and weight but only about 50 for head size!.

mrsmindcontrol · 09/08/2013 08:31

I had a growth scan with DS2 at 37 weeks (he arrived a few days later) & was predicted a 12lb-er so was booked in for a ELCS, he arrived naturally that week weighing 8lb 4. He was forceps in the end but I had no stitches.
I realise you've had a previously big baby but I'd still advise caution regarding these growth scans.

Coldcuppacoffee · 09/08/2013 08:35

My growth scan said 10lb'er but DC2 was 9lb6. Much better birth than first time (9lb3).
Sometimes I think doctors don't believe women can give birth anymore.

mrslyman · 09/08/2013 08:35

DS2 was 9 6 with a very very big head. I did have a 3rd degree tear, but at the very mild end of the 3rd degree scale. However, I'm pretty sure the reason I tore was the hurry that I was in to get him out rather than just being to do with his size. I reckon if I couldhave kept a little bit more control during pushing the tearing wouldn't have been as bad.

Now whether there was ever a hope of that being possible is another matter, but those are my thoughts on how I'd hope to avoid tearing with another baby Smile

Coldcuppacoffee · 09/08/2013 08:36

Ps. Couple of stitches. Only coz I pushed too hard and wasn't listening.

Souredstoneshasasouredpebble · 09/08/2013 08:40

I had a 7lb baby with a large head that tore me up and down

Was on my back for delivery as dr had to put my legs in stirrups to help manually pull the baby out.

Size means jack all

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