Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not know what I supposedly did wrong here?

311 replies

LackingEnergy · 08/08/2013 16:12

Yesterday as a huge favour to my Dsis we looked after our Dniece (8) and Dnephew (5) for the day at very short notice.

They had breakfast with us since they arrived at 7am - Toast with honey

We went to the park for a few hours

We made cupcakes and Dniece and Dnephew decorated them (took some home for mum, dad and them to eat later and ate one while they were here)

Had lunch - A sandwich, slices of pepper, cucumber, carrot and tomatoes and some pringles

Had a ride on the ponies (Dsis expects this to happen as she uses me as a free instructor and it helps keep the weight off the ponies - they came with all their riding gear)

Did some drawings. Some went on our fridge the rest were taken home

Took the dogs for a walk and had another play at the park

Had tea - Homemade pizza and homemade wedges followed by slices of banana, apple, pear, grapes and a chocolate mousse pot to dip them in

Watched UP

Dsis picked them up at 8pm two hours later than she was meant to, they were more than ready for bed. She asked what they'd had to eat and wasn't happy with the above. She also wasn't happy that they were so tired. I'm not sure why?

For a very last minute thing with just me and three children from 8-6 I think we packed a lot of fun things in

OP posts:
Ashinagai · 08/08/2013 21:54

Good lord, I'm sure you don't need to hear this again but that sounds like a lovely day for anyone! Food perfectly acceptable. We will be over in the morning Smile

Earthworms · 08/08/2013 22:06

Sorry, where are you again?

I'm just loading the dc and I'll be with you.

ponies

Wow.

WeAreSeven · 08/08/2013 22:10

Lacking, I hope you are prepared. I reckon you have 549 children turning up at yours this weekend!

candycoatedwaterdrops · 08/08/2013 22:17

It's typical MN to have a perfectly adequate menu picked apart.

OP, you're a star. Also, I hope you are prepared for the 36 adults who will be joining the 549 children and remember, the oldest should get the first pony rides! Wink

Emilythornesbff · 08/08/2013 22:20

Grin true candycoated and weareseven

SoftKittyWarmKitty · 08/08/2013 22:21

If you're not sure why she wasn't happy with what you fed them/did, you need to ask her. I mean, you don't want to be making the same mistakes on Saturday, do you? Hmm While you're at it, remind her that you provided a long day of childcare at short notice free of charge.

Oh, and if my childcare had all-of-a-sudden gone kaput and I had to rely on family to provide it during the week, I certainly wouldn't be fucking off out on Saturday as well. She's taking the piss.

MidniteScribbler · 08/08/2013 22:24

Will you be my sister?

If someone did me such a massive favour, and gave my son a day like that, I can't even imagine bothering to ask what he ate!

HooverFairy · 08/08/2013 22:31

Firstly, YANBU, your sister sounds like a cow. I'd stick to previously arranged babysitting but I would make sure you're 'busy' next time. She is lucky to have you and needs to realise, once she has apologised you can maybe stop being busy when she asks. It sounds like something you and the children really enjoy.

LongDi I think you're spot on here, the Dsis is jealous because the children had a great time.

Emily that's what I was thinking!

Thumbwitch · 09/08/2013 01:57

"I'd be annoyed if my DCs were fed a chocolate covered moose "
well yes, I'd be pretty pissed off about this too. Moose is a very large animal and the children would be very ill if they ate a whole one!

MrsDimples · 09/08/2013 02:16

She's just jealous the kids had such a fab day. I want to come & do all that!!!

Seriously.

WOW.

Amazeballs.

I am a SAHM & despite all my grand ideas and wishful thinking, when it comes to actual execution we probably do in a week, what you did in one day - apart from activities organised by others, that we just attend.

PS Can you do my menu planning?
I can ride your ponies whilst you do this, if that helps Grin

Beastofburden · 09/08/2013 02:32

I think the sister is being incredibly unreasonable, including expecting OP to have her kids on saturday so she can have a day out with DH (did i get that right?) Fine to pay your childminder to do it if you want to, not fine to tell family that you need emergency childcare for free to do it. Manage without your day off till you get childcare sorted FFs. Mst of us never had that anyway.

Agree with posters who say she is patronising you as she thinks she is the more experienced mother. Do not run your food choices past her. Also, your lovely day that u have planned for next time- feel free to be a bit less perfect if you want to. You have nothing to prove.

Is this is long term sister thing? You say she is anxious and you are happy to help. She sounds a bit of a diva, sorry.

NapaCab · 09/08/2013 04:18

Saturday is her and her Dhs day out

WTAF? Your sister sounds like a spoilt, entitled cow. If she has had to have emergency childcare all week as a favor from family then surely that means weekend plans get cancelled?

I really think you should just cancel Saturday on her and let her deal with reality for once. You have to ask yourself, if you were in the same boat and stuck in an emergency needing childcare, would she help you out? I'm guessing the answer is a big 'no'. She'd be too busy having her weekend to herself with her DH, I'm sure.

mrssprout · 09/08/2013 05:31

I am stunned that she wasn't happy with this. Sounds like a great day & the food sounds fine. If I ever have to ask family to have my DD I am just happy for the help. When mum & dad had DD last mum asked what DD would like for dinner. I said just make whatever she had planned, don't go to any trouble but she deliberately made one of DD's favourites. I expect that if mum&dad or one of my sisters look after her there will be some treats involved, it's not a big issue.

VestaCurry · 09/08/2013 05:41

She sounds like a right cow. Tell her to sod off next time she wants someone to babysit for nearly 12 hours.

digerd · 09/08/2013 06:22

VestaCurry has said just what I am thinking. She is treating you like a doormat.

Numberlock · 09/08/2013 06:34

Am I the only reading it that she didn't like the menu provided because it was too healthy, ie no processed shite that they're used to? So to her veg in a sandwich isn't a proper meal. (Also if there wasn't any meat topping on the pizza.). To her a proper meal is nuggets, chips and beans, eg.

Dackyduddles · 09/08/2013 07:33

Unfortunately number lock that's exactly how I read it.

Btw op I can groom and ride too. Dd (2.5) is dab hand with a broom! These ponies will be fittest in land if we all turn up!

Groovee · 09/08/2013 08:03

Numberlock I think that's the problem too.

Redlocks30 · 09/08/2013 08:16

What happened to make her normal childcare fall through?!

Where the hell are they off to tomorrow for their 'day out together' ? That should definitely go if you're suddenly using family as free childcare all week. They must have pots of free cash now! How do your parents feel a out this; is she likely to criticise their food?!

I thing the phrase 'taking the piss' springs to mind.

Numberlock · 09/08/2013 08:22

OP - your sister may be a twat but at least you have a lovely relationship with your nephew and niece.

In your shoes I would want to say my piece but I'd probably try to keep my gob shut as I wouldn't want anything to jeopardise the relationship with the children.

Keep up the good work!

vintagecakeisstillnice · 09/08/2013 09:04

I've coasted through the thread but one thing I'd like to say

Can I come and play?
Can I come and play?
Can I come and play?
Can I come and play?
Can I come and play?

Can I?
Can I?
Can I?
Can I?
Can I?

I'll be really good.............

BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability · 09/08/2013 09:17

Numberlock, I said the same pages ago Grin

Can't believe its taken this long for anyone else to think it!

Redlocks30 · 09/08/2013 09:41

Would you really say nothing though-just to keep the peace?

This has annoyed OP enough to post on here about it yet you'd recommend she just does it again and pokes up with any more ungrateful comments. There lies the path of bitterness and resentment...!

What I don't understand is why OP didn't say something at the time? If that had been my sister moaned her kids were tired, I'd have said, 'well, we were expecting you two hours ago' or if she commented about the food, say 'was there a problem?'

I'm not a confrontational person but would rather establish what the problem was.

Emilythornesbff · 09/08/2013 09:50

Were they really grumpy because they were so tired?
Obviously not your fault as she was late collecting them.
I do need an update as I like to have closure on these things. Grin

Littlegreyauditor · 09/08/2013 09:52

Never mind DS, can I come to you for the day? I'll be good, I promise, I'll do everything I'm told, and I'm really good with chubby ponies and dogs.

( don't make me watch Up though, I'll cry)