TidyDancer's bridezilla thread part 3

[TidyDancer]

Here you go!

I second that arrow has it spot on. Calm, factual and unemotive.

Oh here everyone is! hello

I am not sure about all the "I cancelled the day off I had booked" stuff. Of course this may be the main reason for Tidy but I get the impression the main reason for declining is: "why do you think I must like you enough to do you a massive favour when you've just made it clear you don't even like me enough to have me at your wedding?"

I still quite like the idea of the simple

'it is never a good idea to show how little someone means to you just before asking them to do a massive favour'

Let's just hope that the sister doesn't make us all wait 3 days for a response.

i also think sister hasn't got anything to do with it.

.

Looking forward to your response to the sister. Gives you a great opportunity to say what you need succinctly!

Let's hope the sister is a 'zilla chiller!

so now the bride adds her sister in- bet she didnt explain all what had happened

a polite concise reply like below should be enough

facts only

I mentioned the day off stuff to try and keep the emotion out of it, iyswim?
I assuomg tidy is employed (rather than self employed) and therefore has a fixed allocation off holidays.

Why get her sister involved? People who get other people involved in their arguments who have no reason to get involved do my nut in! Why can't she accept no means no? She's making it really difficult for Tidy to be her friend after the wedding. Even if Tidy hadn't received a STD (love that acronym!) card she is still entitled to say no, I'm not free that day, it's not convenient for me to get childcare. You don't have to do someone a favour if you don't want to! especially someone who's not a 'good enough' friend to make the shortlist!

But yes agree that the main reason is the lack of invite. I think TD needs to avoid any implication of sour grapes. we know it is not but the sister might conclude that.

I can't be sure that bridezilla actually knows her sister has emailed. This might be done without her knowledge.

You are going to include the bit about it not being a great plan to mightily piss someone off just before requesting a huge favour from them, aren't you? And I think that the save the date stuff is not just filler - surely it's the crux? Depending on the circumstances I might just help out a friend whose decorator had bailed on them even if I weren't invited to the do. It's the "I'm so great and my wedding's so special you need to save the date just in case you make the cut" that would have me seething!

Good grief just read the other threads and can't believe the cheek of some people. Definately put your side to the sister.

Well I'd say sisterzilla probably is sick to death of the wedding - I'd imagine someone as oblivious as gluezilla probably has situations on all sides. So I'd take that tone in reply - that you're confused about it all too. You got the STD and then no invitation, but then you're somehow decorating? Someone's got the wrong end if the stick somewhere, because as far as you're concerned, there was never any question of you going other than as a guest...

Exactly balloon, she must be so self obsessed that people should want to do favours for her, even though she does not like them as much, just smacks I love myself so much. Tidy said in her first tread that she talked about te wedding a lot to people

Agree with BalloonSlayer ^^

I agree Tidy, you'd have to be some kind of machiavellian master to have planned not to invite you but sent STD card to ensure your services were available. And i think if you imply that you are going to look a bit strange and narcissistic/paranoid.

Just plain facts. it needs no hyperbole.

Exactly corrie bet she's one of those on Facebook who announces quite dramatically that's she's making a cull, and will you ake te cut, see you on the other side if you have, bad luck if you haven't, type things. The friends say pick me pick e in response to tat status. Tidys mum said that when they were younger brides ills was very self absorbed, nothing changes eh

I did not not mention my wedding unless people asked me, towards the end I found it all just boring talking about it when asked

Tidy can I just say that I am very very pleased that you have started your second and third threads yourself, i have my settings so the OP's threads are green and I can easily scroll through for updates, so when someone else starts the next thads it really bugs me, so for that!

In no way using this thin compliment to mark my place waiting for this crazy saga to unfold further

Exactly those std cards sent to the 20 not invited we're to reserve the day so they can provide service to bridezilla, not as a guest

I think ArrowofApollo has it spot on.