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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think you don't need 4 eggs and 7 slices of ham to make an omelette for one person???

273 replies

PenguinBear · 01/08/2013 08:09

This seems excessive to me... No-one needs that much in one omelette... Surely 2 eggs and 2 slices of ham would be fine?

OP posts:
LadyBigtoes · 01/08/2013 15:07

Curlew you are right, men shouldn't be so clueless, we should not baby them and actually I tried to make my post specifically not about men vs. women generally - but it does often seem to be that way.

I often discuss things like this with DP because it is exhausting being the only one who plans/budgets/thinks about things in advance. But he basically would not do it if it were his choice. He'd rather live in expensive chaos than have to spend time thinking about that stuff - and he would. So it's sort of my choice to do it IYSWIM and I can't reasonably force him. I struggle with it though.

GemmaTeller · 01/08/2013 15:23

DH would use 4 eggs and three slices of ham then eat the other four slices of ham whilst the omelette was cooking.

goodasitgets · 01/08/2013 15:28

If he knows about the finances then yes HIBU
I often eat similar for breakfast though as on a low carb plan, use 3/4 eggs for scrambled or an omelette

BridgetBidet · 01/08/2013 16:29

If he ate it all that would be fine.

I warn you, I have been in a relationship where the food I ate was resented by my partner. It is one of the worst, most soul destroying things you can do to a partner. Expecting them to go hungry or eat unpleasant food just because it is more convenient for you financially.

You are buying eggs and ham so presumably you are happy for the rest of your family to eat it. To say to your husband that he must eat smaller portions which leave him hungry or else eat a cheaper alternative whilst being happy for the rest of the family to eat the nice stuff you would be really out of order.

I think trying to control what a partner eats is one of the most insidious, nasty forms of control.

If he was ordering expensive pizzas or eating beluga caviar you might have a point. Or if he was cooking but leaving loads of leftovers.

But you can't control what he eats and if you try you are looking for trouble.

BridgetBidet · 01/08/2013 16:34

Incidentally the 'I plan the shopping list' thing is a red herring. Planning a shopping list that doesn't have enough food for your DP to eat is not planning a shopping list properly. You need to change the budget so everyone has enough to eat. Not so that one 'undeserving' person is left short of what they need in order not to be hungry.

TeWiSavesTheDay · 01/08/2013 16:45

That depends totally on whether you have a budget and meal plan of the kind which are nice if you stick to it but not vital, or On A Budget in the way that means every last penny has been carefully spent to make sure that everyone has protein, veg and enough calories every day.

If the OP is on the first position it's a bit inconsiderate but not the end of the world - just something to chat about when you plan the next week's food.

If she is in the second position (which plenty of people are right now) then he's been a selfish cunt and left everyone else in the family without.

If they're somewhere in between then so is his behaviour.

wigglybeezer · 01/08/2013 16:45

I use a blini pan and make one egg / one slice of ham omelettes for breakfast, admittedly usually served in a sandwich but if DH is having a low carb day he has just the omelette. ( he does have a sedentary job though). If it was lunch or tea I would use two eggs, only three if they were tiny. IMO your DH was Greedy and thoughtless.

curlew · 01/08/2013 17:01

Ooh, I want a little fairy omelette!

MrsKoala · 01/08/2013 17:18

I don't think it's excessive.

Depends on the size of the eggs/ham. If large/extra large eggs i would have 3 eggs but if they were medium, or small ones from those cheaper mixed boxes then i think for is normal. I need about 2400 cals a day. That meal would be about 800, so three 800 cal meals would be just enough. Dh needs about 3000.

If however you are on a budget it's no good saying you can have one or 2 eggs if it doesn't touch the sides. We are budgeting too and have agreed bacon and eggs are for dinners or weekend brunches. Weekdays are porridge and toast. but if you get eggs from iceland - i don't but mil does - i think you can get a box of about 24 for £1.50. Which probably makes it cheaper than 2 weetabix.

kelda · 01/08/2013 17:20

Good point Bridget.

I think there is a lot of this on this thread, looking down at people who may eat a bit more then they do.

The comment about feeing their whole family on one egg and some dandelion roots sums up the attitude of some posters perfectly.

UniqueAndAmazing · 01/08/2013 17:22

it's not okay as a main meal!

it is just protein and fat!

you need vegetables and carbohydrates in there too to make it a meal.

UniqueAndAmazing · 01/08/2013 17:25

Blackholes - don't put your eggs in the fridge - the condensation ruins their protective membrane and makes them go off quicker.

VivaLeBeaver · 01/08/2013 17:26

I'd have a 4 egg omlette with some cheese for a main meal.

grumpyoldbat · 01/08/2013 17:31

That's a valid point but equally why do I have to go hungry? Why am I not deserving of food? Our food budget is pretty small to increase it would mean using the commute to work budget how can earn if I don't get there? Or I could use the rent money where would I cook then? Or what about not paying the electricity and have nothing to cook on.

My husband is very fussy and I bend over backwards to accommodate his tastes. I don't starve him I resent that accusation. I give him the biggest portions and if he complains it's not enough I give him some off my plate. If he eats or throws away the leftovers that were meant for lunch then I do without and don't make a big deal out of it. How am I being cruel?

Oh yes and each week I try and get him to have input to the shopping list and meal planning but he refuses.

digerd · 01/08/2013 17:32

Nothing satisfies me like a big juicy steak, chips and salad. Eggs just don't do it as a main meal.

MrsKoala · 01/08/2013 17:36

was this for breakfast? if so is that not a 'main meal'? I have 3 main meals a day and they are all of equal size.

curlew · 01/08/2013 17:39

"My husband is very fussy and I bend over backwards to accommodate his tastes. I don't starve him I resent that accusation. I give him the biggest portions and if he complains it's not enough I give him some off my plate. If he eats or throws away the leftovers that were meant for lunch then I do without and don't make a big deal out of it. How am I being cruel?"

This does not sound like a healthy relationship.

tethersend · 01/08/2013 17:41

I'm shocked and saddened by this vulgar display of gluttony.

expatinscotland · 01/08/2013 17:43

What if the OP and family literally do not have the money to eat like this? 'Oh, he's hungry.' Well, so might everyone else be if he eats all the food meant for everyone.

forevergreek · 01/08/2013 17:43

3/4 egg omelette here

Our tiny toddlers would each 2 eggs omelette ( surely you can't make one smaller?)

7 slices of ham If not wafer is probably more than we would have. Probably 2 slices here

An omelette for x2 adults and x2 toddlers here would be x10 eggs, 6 slices ham, large handful cheese, 1/2 box mushrooms. I don't think that's excessive and none of us are large ( I'm size 6/8, dh tall but slim, toddlers normal Sized for age)

A box of 6 organic eggs costs us £1.80. So an omelette as above for all 4 of us around £5, which I think is rather good ( more likely omelette for dinner here, but any other meal fine also)

forevergreek · 01/08/2013 17:45

Oh and as others said I would eat less at other meals if one meal large. So large breakfast, but then small lunch, or late lunch, small dinner.

Val007 · 01/08/2013 17:51

I'm suprised that people count the bites their husbands put in their mouth. But then again... I have seen much worse here - where mothers hide food from their children - ABOMINABLE!

tethersend · 01/08/2013 17:53

I hid a box of quality street down the back of the fridge once. The little buggers kept taking all the good ones. Does that count?

lottieandmia · 01/08/2013 17:55

'That's a valid point but equally why do I have to go hungry? Why am I not deserving of food?'

OP, you are absolutely deserving of food and YADNBU!! This idea that men need to eat most of the food annoys me. Men do need more calories than women but not that many more!! My dp eats a lot but he never eats at the expense of other people ever. Your dh is selfish.

lottieandmia · 01/08/2013 18:03

See, the thing is that if money is not an issue for you then you can of course buy as many eggs a week as you want (I have a friend like this - her shopping bill is £240 a week but she can afford it) but if you don't have the money for that then you should make sure you don't take food at the expense of others in the house.

And on what planet does 7 slices of ham cost 75p? Ham is expensive - more like £3 and £2 for a box of eggs.