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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect my sister to put herself out for ONE night?

414 replies

HDEE · 28/07/2013 19:09

Typing on phone so excuse any errors

I am so angry with my sister. I am currently in a hospital 1.5 hours from home. I have been here for three weeks now as my waters broke early at 21/22 weeks and this was the nearest hospital with a suitable NICU cot.

Baby was born on Friday. He is incredibly sick. His first two nights I was called to NICU in the night as they didn't expect him to survive. Last night he suffered major bleeds to both sides of his brain. We have been told he is critical and any worsening of the bleed (very likely) will mean discussing withdrawing intensive care.

I asked my sister if she could please stay overnight at my house (she has been there through the day looking after my three year old twins and six year old) but decided shed rather go home.

This means that should I need to get my husband here, the plan now is that I phone him, he gets our children out of bed and ready to go, loads them into the car, regardless of time, then drives the 50 minutes to her house, unloads them where they have nowhere to sleep, then drives the hour journey to me.

This is fucking ridiculous. Apparently she was saying 'but I have no clean clothes to wear'. Well boo fucking hoo. I'm waiting for my two day old baby to take a turn for the worse and die at any time, and she doesn't want to be a little uncomfortable?

I am never, ever speaking to her again. Especially if my husband can't get here and I have to do all this alone.

FTR she doesn't drive. My dad lives 5 minutes from her so this morning when I needed my husband here it took him 2.5 hours from my phone call to arrival by the time they got to him, and he got here.

I suspect a large part of it is that her partner is making a fuss being left with their three children. But he doesn't work, and I need her help more :(

OP posts:
thepixiefrog · 30/07/2013 07:35

Much love to you and your family.xxx

danielswifetobe · 30/07/2013 07:56

Sending love to you and your family xxx

MammaTJ · 30/07/2013 08:03

What a brave little fighter George is.

MrsDeVere · 30/07/2013 08:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cherriesarelovely · 30/07/2013 08:13

Your little George sounds like a beautiful boy x I'm thinking of you and your family x

Cuddlydragon · 30/07/2013 08:15

George sounds like a fighter. I wish you and your children all the love and strength to cope with this awful time. I'll keep George in my prayers, as others have said it doesn't sound hopeless and I know your little one will fight hard to come through this. X

tholeon · 30/07/2013 08:39

Dear little boy. Am in surrey and crb checked if any use. X

CakesAreNotTheAnswer · 30/07/2013 08:43

If you're by any chance in the JR I can come along to be with you and George if you want, or bring you any bits you need.

wishing you and your whole family the very best of luck x

ajandjjmum · 30/07/2013 08:46

Thinking of you OP, baby George and the rest of your family.

TheMagicKeyCanFuckOff · 30/07/2013 08:48

Good luck and you, your family and George are in my thoughts. He sounds like a completely adorable fighter.

FatimaLovesBread · 30/07/2013 08:52

Your last post brought tears to my eyes.
George sounds like an incredible and beautiful boy.
Sending best wishes and hope Thanks

MissStrawberry · 30/07/2013 09:01

Your latest post was just so moving. I can feel the love you have for George coming through your words. I think you are right to keep the hope going. Sometimes doctors are wrong and George hasn't read the book about what he is meant to be doing after being born so prematurely.

Will be thinking of you all.

Caboodle · 30/07/2013 09:06

HDEE, hearing how strong and brave your lovely little boy is made me smile. Thinking of you and sending my love.

CunningAtBothEnds · 30/07/2013 09:08

Praying for gorgeous George, i believe in miracles x

SamHamwidge · 30/07/2013 09:08

Thinking of you and George and hoping and praying he pulls through. X x

CatelynStark · 30/07/2013 09:11

I can't begin to imagine what you're going through. Sending positive vibes to you and your family xxx

bumbleymummy · 30/07/2013 09:12

Thinking of you all. Xo

SlightlyItchyBraStrap · 30/07/2013 09:14

Am down under so can offer no practical help, but am thinking of you and your family. I hope that baby George pulls through.

5madthings · 30/07/2013 09:18

hdee thankyou for sharing and telling us about little George,he certainly sounds like he a fighting personality already! sending you all much love and strength.

mynameisslimshady · 30/07/2013 09:19

Sending love and strength to little George and his amazing family xx

proudmum74 · 30/07/2013 09:23

HDEE this is such a moving thread that I didn't want to just read & run. I was in a similar position when DD was born due to complications at birth, she needed to be in SCBU & for the first week there was a real risk that she wouldn't survive. Whilst the rest of the family dropped everything to rush to the hospital to meet DD, my twin phoned to say it wasn't convenient for her & she'd come to see her in 2 weeks. This was despite the fact that i'd told her DD was not expected to survive the night.

Thankfully, like George, DD is a fighter & pulled through against the odds, but if I'm honest I still haven't completely forgiven my sister 3 years later, we still speak, but our relationship will never be the same again.

Sending you lots of love & hugs to get through the next few weeks.

VulvaVoom · 30/07/2013 09:32

Come on George, we're all rooting for you.

HDEE, you and your family and little George will be in my thoughts.

I'm not religious but I still pray to whoever in these situations that things will work out. I really hope they do xx

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 30/07/2013 09:37

I don't know what to say.

I'll just send you and George and your whole family love and hope.

Thanks
UnexpectedStepmum · 30/07/2013 09:47

HDEE I haven't stopped thinking about you and your little one, thank you for letting us know how he is. I am praying for him and you too, if there is any help any of us can give you do let us know. Keep being positive.

JassyRadlett · 30/07/2013 09:50

HDEE, I've been thinking of you and your family since you posted. Sending you strength and hope.