Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to say no to this request from a friend?

1001 replies

TidyDancer · 21/07/2013 10:16

An old friend is getting married in my home town next month. She has been talking about it non-stop since she got engaged last year and everyone's very happy for her. She sent out save the date cards and all was good.

Invitation time came around, and nothing arrived. I wouldn't normally have asked but since she had sent the save the date, I assumed DP and I were invited.

Turns out nope, we're not, and neither is another of our close friends (also from our hometown). She didn't offer up any explanation for it, other than to confirm that we weren't invited. Fine, her prerogative to invite whoever she likes to her wedding. I was a bit put out, I'll admit, since we'd had the save the date card, but oh well. Our other excluded friend was very upset and had a chat with the bride. During this conversation, friend was informed that the bride sent out the save the date cards knowing she wouldn't invite everyone and seemed to be under the impression that the cards were for the purpose of telling people about the wedding before the guest list had been finished. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think that's the case? About 20ish people are also not invited.

Fast forward to now, four weeks to the wedding, and the bride has emailed me. No mention at all of not being invited etc. However, she is now requesting my help with decorating the venue. Apparently most people are coming from out of town so she doesn't have much local help and doesn't think she will be able to find the time to do it herself. She also mentioned wanting to keep the decorations a surprise for the wedding guests so doesn't really want to ask for help from the few locals that are invited.

I'll accept not being invited, like I say it's up to her. We have been friends for a long time and it does hurt that I'm not invited but I'm not going to make a scene over it.

But AIBU to refuse her request for help? Does it look petty? My perspective maybe a bit skewed but I think she's being cheeky.

OP posts:
MammaTJ · 21/07/2013 18:36

I admire her cheek greatly and wish I had the same amount myself! Grin

EvieanneVolvic · 21/07/2013 18:36

Me too Old Lady Subscriber Trunk Dialling (before that long distance calls always had to go through the operator. Grin

WaitMonkey · 21/07/2013 18:46

Just treated myself to reading the takeaway thread again. Grin

YouStayClassySanDiego · 21/07/2013 18:46

Sorry I shortened it to STD, on phone and lazy typing.

OldLadyKnowsNothing · 21/07/2013 19:00

LOL Evieann, that wasn't quite the one I had in mind... Grin

MojitoMagnet · 21/07/2013 19:08

Just wow - marking my place and adding my tuppenoth YANBU - looking forward to seeing her response!

EvieanneVolvic · 21/07/2013 19:10

Really OldLady??

AngusAndElspethsThistleWhistle · 21/07/2013 19:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Iwishitwouldgetwarmer · 21/07/2013 19:33

Just found this thread and can't believe that someone would be so cheeky!

bouncingbelle · 21/07/2013 19:34

Marking place. LOVED the response by op Smile

CeliaFate · 21/07/2013 19:38

What a rude woman! No doubt you'll be cast as the villain of the piece in her head. Deluded doesn't begin to cover it.

WhereBeThatBlackbirdTo · 21/07/2013 19:41

Evie STD - sexually trans disease Grin

RappyNash · 21/07/2013 19:44
Shock
ViviPru · 21/07/2013 19:45

I sense a classic in the making, all dependent on this bridezilla's response!!

bellablot · 21/07/2013 20:05

What!? And you didn't immediately tell her where to stick her decorations!?

Disgraceful behaviour, you don't need people like that as friends. Shock

newbiefrugalgal · 21/07/2013 20:12

Maybe you should have agreed.
Given your favourite MN friends a heads up if time and location and we would happily help decorate her dream wedding reception!

newbiefrugalgal · 21/07/2013 20:12

I remember take away thread too!

BatwingsAndButterflies · 21/07/2013 20:29

Wunderbar, OP you have the best MN entertainment social life :o

Areyoumadorisitme · 21/07/2013 20:54

I wonder if she won't reply at all. Interested to see an update when it comes though.

Now off to read the takeaway thread!

Sister77 · 21/07/2013 20:59

Marking place

quoteunquote · 21/07/2013 21:02

"Sorry I am unavailable, I have a save the date card for an important event"

nilbyname · 21/07/2013 21:06

Oh oh oh! op you are awesome!

Can't wait to hear the reply!

RoooneyMara · 21/07/2013 21:08

Quote - that event being the wedding itself? Lol Smile

YoureAllABunchOfBastards · 21/07/2013 21:15

Fucking hell. My FIL would reply with 'How does Fuck Off grab you?'

Notafoodbabyanymore · 21/07/2013 21:16

OP, so pleased you stuck up for yourself and sent that reply. I've got a bad feeling she's now going to compound her rudeness by not replying. Hope I'm wrong!

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is not accepting new messages.