An old friend is getting married in my home town next month. She has been talking about it non-stop since she got engaged last year and everyone's very happy for her. She sent out save the date cards and all was good.
Invitation time came around, and nothing arrived. I wouldn't normally have asked but since she had sent the save the date, I assumed DP and I were invited.
Turns out nope, we're not, and neither is another of our close friends (also from our hometown). She didn't offer up any explanation for it, other than to confirm that we weren't invited. Fine, her prerogative to invite whoever she likes to her wedding. I was a bit put out, I'll admit, since we'd had the save the date card, but oh well. Our other excluded friend was very upset and had a chat with the bride. During this conversation, friend was informed that the bride sent out the save the date cards knowing she wouldn't invite everyone and seemed to be under the impression that the cards were for the purpose of telling people about the wedding before the guest list had been finished. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think that's the case? About 20ish people are also not invited.
Fast forward to now, four weeks to the wedding, and the bride has emailed me. No mention at all of not being invited etc. However, she is now requesting my help with decorating the venue. Apparently most people are coming from out of town so she doesn't have much local help and doesn't think she will be able to find the time to do it herself. She also mentioned wanting to keep the decorations a surprise for the wedding guests so doesn't really want to ask for help from the few locals that are invited.
I'll accept not being invited, like I say it's up to her. We have been friends for a long time and it does hurt that I'm not invited but I'm not going to make a scene over it.
But AIBU to refuse her request for help? Does it look petty? My perspective maybe a bit skewed but I think she's being cheeky.
AIBU?
to say no to this request from a friend?
TidyDancer · 21/07/2013 10:16
hi there jim um... Didn't see you around just now... Erm... [waves weakly]
icenoslice - only cos it was posted by the ah-maze-ing talkativeJim I quote from their post of ten past midnight above....
"...In a way, I almost wish you would agree to decorate the venue.
Do you know what my idea would be - that we have a whip-round on here (because they're not cheap) and you buy hundreds, THOUSANDS of Sylvanian Families figurines and put them all over the place - glued to the ceiling, poking out of the table settings, lines of them going up the walls looking (from a distance) like a giant ant infestation. You could even stick them all over the cake, making the bride and groom figures look like guests at that weird Ewok party in the Return of the Jedi. You could go to town on how special it would be and how she wasn't allowed to see it until the actual reception - everyone files in - SIOB en masse
Ah ha ha ha ha..."
talkativeJim - loving your work 
My DH, who has been following this thread with amazement, suggests:
F
k ff.
He then got worried, and now thinks that this is all a coded cry for help. Her fiance is Bluebeard and she wants to get you there in advance of the wedding to help her escape.
If you really think it's not that, then by all means go with his first suggestion.
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