To not understand the assault/internals threads?

[GingerJulep]

I've never had one so am really struggling to understand how so many women on here (NOT aimed specifically at the other poster on this page, there are lots in different sections!) manage to have internal examinations before/during/after birth that they say they didn't consent to/asked to be stopped?

I mean that physically, don't they have the option to just shut legs/take feet out of stirrups/kick HCP in face?

Nearest I've ever come (so far, lucky me!) was someone trying to take blood suddenly... I made an automatic physical reaction (big flinch/jump) and they simply couldn't do it until we'd had a quick cat.

So, how much more difficult is it to avoid/stop internal exams if you really want to IYSWIM?

[Itchywoolyjumper]

Yes, that is me.

[confuddledDOTcom]

Brilliant we just need some more people to sign up because it's feeling rather lonely with just the two!

[ICBINEG]

whaaa...I still can't get in

will try from home...

[thebody]

signed, very important, not for me so much as I can't change my experiences but want to make sure my dds get the best. well done guys.

[confuddledDOTcom]

I'm getting more notifications than I seem to have members make sure you're clicking the link in your email as that's the only thing I can think that could be causing it.

[thebody]

maybe need a fresh thread to advertise?

[thebody]

hi I also clicked email but don't show as a member.

[thebody]

no I am in. //😃

[confuddledDOTcom]

I have a few more people showing please post!

Anyone want to start a new thread?

[Buddhagirl]

Omg this thread is horrendous, I'm having a c section. Thank god for MN.
I'd rather have stitches on my tummy than stitches up my fan job.

[Buddhagirl]

Fan job! Fanjo

[confuddledDOTcom]

A CS doesn't guarantee anything. My BT came from my first CS. Not all natural births end in stitches, my last one the mw said it didn't even look like I'd give birth!

[Buddhagirl]

Oh no, can I ask what was traumatic? I think I'll Google chances of stitches. Ugh it's like a nightmare.

[Itchywoolyjumper]

How this for the new thread?:

Some of you might remember the internal examination thread which ended up with so many women telling the stories of the poor experiences at the hands of health care professionals during their pregnancies, labours and in the post natal period.
Many women spoke of lack of consent, poor communication and lack of respect from those who they should have been able to trust in their most vulnerable hours.
One poster spoke of being held down to be stitched because the pain relief had not yet taken hold and she was writhing in pain, while an other described being made to feel like "the dead meat around the foetus".
Its 2013, these and all the stories like them on the original thread should have been consigned to the history books long ago but instead we are being made to live them.

In response to this some of us are trying to start a campaign to bring this type of treatment to an end.
We have three broad aims:

1. to help empower and support women making complaints against HCPs involved in their obstetric care.
   
   
2. to help educate HCPs to examine their practice and improve their treatment of pregnant, labouring and post natal women.
   
   
3. to lobby to bring about legislation to protect women against obstetric violence.
   
   Some amazing posters have started a website from where we hope to make a start on these aims, you can join us at:
   
   maternity-rights.webs.com/

[confuddledDOTcom]

Mine was traumatic because it was a crash and a GA, but mine is extreme, others can tell stories of CS that are less extreme. It's more likely really because it confuses the body.

I have had 3 VBs and only had stitches once. If you tear naturally, unless it's a very bad tear leaving it to heal itself is better than stitches and better than being cut (which is why most women want to avoid instrumental delivery). There are lots of things you can do to improve your outcomes, keeping mobile and active during labour, not lying down etc. It may be worth you talking to a Supervisor of Midwives or a Doula.

[confuddledDOTcom]

Looks good Itchy!

[Itchywoolyjumper]

New thread started here:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1815683-To-want-us-all-to-be-treated-like-human-beings-while-we-are-in-labour

[confuddledDOTcom]

link

[Whothefuckfarted]

My first sign of labour was my waters breaking. Took a few hours for contractions to start. I had 3 internal 'checks' during my labour. One when I first arrived at hospital to be told I was at 3cm and would be able to stay in rather than sent home. Lovely midwife who calmed me right down.

The second was done at 5cm again no problem, bit uncomfortable but that was it.

The third however after reading all this... I'm not sure what it was. If anyone has any idea what was done to me I'd love a heads up.. thinking about it now I thought it was just a lot more painful because I was fully dilated.. but I'm now wondering what the heck he was doing up there.

I'd been in labour for 21 hours, the midwife called in a male (doctor?) I'd had a LOT of gas and air and was very sleepy due to a shot of pethidine about 5hrs previous. (they'd asked me to move from birth pool to bed as they wanted to give me hormones via drip to speed me up, said pethidine would help as it would mean stronger and more painful contractions)

Anyway I was under the impression that he was checking I was at 10cm so I could start pushing.. It REALLY hurt, I just asked my DH about it and what I said. He says that I DID ask the doctor to stop and he didn't stop. He says he was elbow deep in me. I remember trying to move away. Impossible. Once he had done I do remember him saying 'get rid of that gas and air now' then turned to the midwife and said 'she can push now'.

I don't feel violated (or didn't till now!) I actually loved my birth experience to be fair, I pushed baby out in 40 mins after that. So anyone any idea what he was doing?

[ICBINEG]

Site looks great!

So happy I got in...will sign up tonight when I will have time to post stories etc.

[confuddledDOTcom]

953
TOTAL PAGEVIEWS

I'm sure a few are from me but not that many!

Glad you got in ICBINEG!

[farewellfigure]

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU. I can't believe it. I came back to this post to see if anyone else had posted and look what's happened! I've signed in and posted my story on the website. You are amazing! I really hope it is possible to make labour better for other women. Some of the things I have read on this thread made me so sad and angry. It just should not be happening.