to think it's wrong to leave a baby/toddler sleeping alone in a hotel room?

[strawberry34]

When you have a monitor and are still in the premises?my friend says she does it when on holiday, she goes to the bar/restaurant and responds to the monitor if her 2yo dd wakes, I was shocked and said I wouldn't ever want to, I stay in the room and read a book/have a bath. Aibu to think what she's doing is wrong? I don't want to refer to famous cases but to me there's too much risk.

There, as in there, as in not in a resturant god knows how far away eating my dinner.

In my house.

That easier to grasp for you?

*cotton wool not cotton wall (unless it's Pink Batts, for any other Kiwis on here).

Damn heat.

Totally wrong. We don't leave our 17 month old on his own at our own house even if we have to go to the loo. There is always someone with him in the room. On holiday he would sleep in the pushchair next to us - regardless of where we are. The lay flat position is invented for a good reason

oh god - now we're not even allowed to leave them on their own while we go to the loo in our own homes! single parents are doomed.

oh god - now we're not even allowed to leave them on their own while we go to the loo in our own homes! single parents are doomed.

I was also trying to figure out this one, shewhowines. What is the answer? A catheter bag?

Kids of today are going to grow up with so many hangups and even if you've had a relatively normal upbringing, chances are you're going to be in a relationship with someone completely paranoid about all and nothing. I feel sorry for todays kids.

You have no point, that's what's irritating.

Your home =/= hotel

Hotel =/= your home

For goodness sake, your child is less likely to be snatched if there is somebody there with it, as opposed to the child being left on their own.

Please stop saying that you cannot compare, yes you can compare.

FFS

It just depends on the situation, surely? I have left DS (when aged 8 months or so) in his cot in a hotel room while we ate dinner downstairs with the monitor - but literally down the stairs, in a hotel the size of a large house. I could hear if he made any noise, I could get back into the room in less than 30 seconds, windows and doors were secure. I would not do it in a larger hotel and I would certainly not leave the premises. But in that situation I think he was just as safe as when I leave him in his own room and eat in the garden with the monitor. Which I am doing all the time at the moment.

Yeah I feel sorry for them too, not being left in a strange room as a baby when mum and dad eat god knows how far (because lets face it, how close are you) away from them must be so restricting to their freedoms.

Exactly donttell Judge each situation on it's own merits

Nobody is advocating leaving them any distance paradise .

ParadiseChick I am not answerable to you so I don't believe I have to justify anything to you. I described one of the circumstances in which I left my child in a hotel room.

FWIW in that hotel restaurant, which was one floor away from our room, our monitor meant that we could hear her. We would hear if anyone went into the room. We heard her breathing and saw it flashed on the monitor. We were also checking in on her every half hour - in case you missed that? So I fail to see how that is less safe than you being sat downstairs with your music on whilst your kids sleep upstairs.

If they got out of bed, you might not hear them. If they opened their window, you might not hear them, if they were sick, you might not hear them until they started crying. We would be able to hear all of this.

So in those two comparisons, my child would actually be safer on that night.

And yes I have left money in hotel rooms. I have never used the hotel safe. I do not have valuables, if I did we would have booked an apartment. I have had things stolen from my person twice. I have never had anything stolen from a hotel room. But then I don't tend to frequent hotels, for us it's a one-off; a special occasion.

I think people are getting hysterical now and the thread is getting stupid.

Next thing you know someone will be stating that aliens might descend on the hotel and make off with them!

I think this thread shows just how very far we have moved, as a society, from intelligent and reasonable parents being able to make a reasoned rick assessment and decision re their DC, without hysterics judgements and scorn from the "But what if" brigade.

Clearly, we should all just stay home forever, and clutch pearls quietly, and without wine or gin, in front of our own televisions (which if course are no further away than the room next door than that our sleeping babies).

riSk

There will always be a What If? And that is individual to the circumstances.

If I feel that my child is safe in a hotel room with a baby monitor whilst we have a meal in the same establishment, having consulted with each other and done a risk assessment and with other alternatives having been explored then I retain the right, as a parent to make that decision.

It is not illegal and it is not defined as child abuse. It is up to the discretion of the individual parents involved and anyone else can suck on it.

Tragedies happen - but the odds of them happening are miniscule.

The odds of being killed or injured in a car accident are much higher. None of us need to drive. We could choose to live close to where we walk and never need to get in to a car. Yet we judge the risk of driving to be acceptable - and no-one judges other parents for driving their kids places.

I for one do not think it is healthy - for the parent or the child to live life constrained by what might happen. But I accept that everyone makes different judgements as to what is acceptable risk.

I am trying hard not to be at the refusal to let a 13 year old to stay in a hotel room on their own - he may, for example have special needs or be particularly badly behaved

becool Don't you mean we should be in the same room as our sleeping babies watching tv with our headphones on. If we make the picture dark the light shouldn't disturb them too much. We mustn't eat anything though or we may choke and then won't be there for them in an emergency. Oh no wait, using the tv might cause an electrical fire. Perhaps we should just sit quietly in a dark room. But of course we wouldn't actually be able to see our babies then...

exactly prettybird

It's just wrong. End of.

Being abusive to other parents who make different judgement calls is also very wrong. End of.

Look at your standards of parenting before you criticise others. I'm damn sure if you were to reveal some of the choices you had made, we could all have a good judge and condemnation session of our own.

I think everybody is just reacting from the gut without any real basis for the fear so long as each risk is carefully assessed. Understandable, because it is scary having to bring up kids in todays world of many dangers. But overprotecting them can cause them damage, just in an emotional rather than physical way.

There has to be a happy medium.