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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To still have DD in my room at 14 months?

38 replies

MoveItMoveIt · 06/07/2013 00:09

Its just me and dd. I still have her cot in my room but most of the time shes in my bed with me.

I like having her close and she seems to like it too.

Will I have massive issues when I try and move her into her own room when shes a little older? A few people have told me im making a rod for my own back.

OP posts:

SpooMoo · 06/07/2013 00:12

I don't think yabu but I only have 1 DC who is still in our room at 9mo. Back in very old times families all used to sleep in one room anyway.

Isoscelesnorks · 06/07/2013 00:13

No if you and she sleep and it works for you then do what you want. My son was in my bed until he was almost three, he was just after this diagnosed with ASD. He just could not sleep well on his own.

PomBearWithAnOFRS · 06/07/2013 00:14

My youngest was five when he moved out of my room into a room with two of his brothers.
We did what suited us with each of our DCs and bollocks to what anyone else thought
It's not like she will still be in your room when she's twenty is it? Don't worry about it, she's just a baby still.

uselessinformation · 06/07/2013 00:14

Had son in the room in a cot until age 3. He went into his own bedroom in a proper bed not toddler bed no problems at all.

ChangeyMcChangeName · 06/07/2013 00:14

You might and you might not. It's one of those things....I have 2 DDs and my youngest is 5 and she'd probably love that arrangement still! She's a horror for hugging me all night and comes into my bed at about 2.am every night.

My older Dd can't bear hugging all night...likes her space.

I would get her room ready for her now...let her see it etc and then when she's older and you feel ready, move her in there. You might have a battle but she's only a baby still really and I like you, quite enjoy co sleeping. Deal with it when the time comes.

5madthings · 06/07/2013 00:16

Am currently in bed with dd aged 2.5yrs. its fine, mine all went into their own beds in their own rooms at about three yrs ish no bother at all. They tend to grow out of these things.

At 14mths she is still a baby, enjoy it :)

TokenGirl1 · 06/07/2013 00:18

My view is that she's not going to want to be in bed with you when she's 16 is she?

I think you should do what feels right for you and your daughter. My dd and ds were in our room until age 3.5 and 2.5 purely because we only lived in a one bed place.

When we moved they settled fine in their own room although, like lots of very young children they do end up in bed with us. I definitely think that they slept through the night better (on a more regular basis) when they had their beds in our room.

elQuintoConyo · 06/07/2013 00:20

We still co-sleep with DS, he's 18mo. We haven't tried him in his own room yet, we are all quite happy where he is... even when he kicks us in his sleep!
We're moving in August, he starts nursery in September and he starts nursery in October, we'll be waiting until after Christmas to try him in his own room, I'm not looking forward to it

breatheslowly · 06/07/2013 00:22

YANBU. If it was just me and DD she would definitely be in with me. She'll leave when she's ready or sooner if you want her to.

elQuintoConyo · 06/07/2013 00:23

I start work in October! Sorry, I'm half asleep, must turn off The Mentalist!

TokenGirl1 · 06/07/2013 00:24

I'd add that if I had my way they'd still have, their beds in our room now. They seem to like the security of being near me when it's dark outside and that feels right to me. It's what they did in the "olden days".

CooEeeEldridge · 06/07/2013 00:24

I s

cariadmawr · 06/07/2013 00:33

As I write have ds2 age 7 sandwiched between me and dh !!1 was in our room till 3.5 as only 2 bedhouse ans extra room much smaller than box oldest ds2 is 20 he always cwtched in too make the most of it soon grow up .

cariadmawr · 06/07/2013 00:35

Sorry phone ds1 is 20 not sa2 now would be squash I'd ge was there !!!! Sorry been long day

pookamoo · 06/07/2013 00:37

DD2 is 22 months and hasn't yet done a whole night in her cot in the room she's supposed to share with her sister. Most of the time we don't even bother trying. That "rod you are making for your own back" is a lovely one with cuddles!

mrscumberbatch · 06/07/2013 00:46

DD is 3 and a half and still in bed with me.... it's 50% lovely, 50% complete PITA

AgentZigzag · 06/07/2013 00:57

My DD is three and a half too and still comes most of the night in bed with us

I wondered the same as you OP, but reading a poster on here saying 'don't worry, they'll not be in your bed still when they're 18 ' made me feel better.

If it's working for you, and working for her, don't give a monkeys about anyone else. If you're making a rod for your own back, then deal with it as/when, if it's not this it'll be something else.

Original poster

MoveItMoveIt · 06/07/2013 01:03

Thankyou everyone nice to see lots of stories of people doing the same thing.

If its not broke eh? Working for us both at the minute

OP posts:

AgentZigzag · 06/07/2013 01:08

When DD2 got to about 2ish, I knew theoretically that she 'should' be in her own bed/room, but for selfish reasons I wasn't ready for her to go, and for her own selfish reasons, she wasn't either

We both wanted to have those things being in the same room/bed gives you, and they're such amazing things, it seems a shame to let any guilt spoil them.

Plenty of time for her to be sleeping away from you.

FirstStopCafe · 06/07/2013 03:20

YANBU - if it works for you why change it?

kritur · 06/07/2013 04:05

Also on my own and 19 month old dd is in bed with me. Plenty of room in the bed when you're on your own so why now!?

Isoscelesnorks · 06/07/2013 04:47

Less washing as well if its just the one bed

ukatlast · 06/07/2013 06:07

YANBU whatever works for you. Did loads of co-sleeping with our two - never forced them out - they decided for themselves. It's only a problem if you'd prefer to be alone.

Uptheairymountain · 06/07/2013 06:32

YANBU, I hope!

My 13 month old DD sleeps with me and we're no hurry to change that. If she wakes up in the night she quietly plays with her toys for a while then, when she's ready to go back to sleep, gives me a big, sloppy kiss and says "night."

No reason to share that story - it just makes me happy .

catgirl1976 · 06/07/2013 06:35

If it works for the pair of you then it's fine :)

If it ain't broke...............

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