to think that most women would rather have a girl/girls than a boy/boys?

[jellysandwich]

I have read so many posts with pregnant mothers who are upset that they are having a ds and in real life I find that mothers who have all boys or boys first, tend to denigrate them to mums of girls and put their daughters on pedestals. Mums of girls tend to not mind having no boys whereas all boy mums seem to feel sad that they have only boys. I have never come across any women who only wanted boy(s).

Am I right in thinking that most women want to have girls and wouldn't mind having all girls if they have more than one child, whereas boys are almost always seen as second best and not the desired choice of most women?

Grimble-in addition to the 2 ds and dd that I have,I have also buried 3 baby ds and had numerous miscarriages.I still had a preference for a ds-especially as my 1st ds only lived for 10 hours.So I shall not be apologising for wanting a son,thanks.

Some of my friends who only had boys were as OP described. I had 2 DDs and no real desire for boys as only heard negative things about boys. I admit to 'feeling sorry' for those with only boys. I feel stupid now as once I had my own boys I revelled in being a boy mum and it is as amazing as being a mum to girls. I now appreciate other's boys too.

The friends with 2 or 3 boys and 'desperate' for girls did go on to have a girl. They treat them like a princess with pink galore. They talk of 'girly nights in' or shopping days. I was never into that with DDs. They often wore jeans and I do the same activities with DDs as DSs. I am very glad I have all my Dc and if I had another would love boy or girl! Couldn't choose.

Why would you join MN and then post something like this?

Are you writing/researching some kind of pointless and shallow article/TV programme?

Oh don't be so silly, OP.

What utter bollocks. I had no preference, and am now delighted with my 2 DSs, who could not be more different in personality to each other - one loves coming into town with me, going to galleries and museums, doing crafty things; the other is a fantastic little bundle of energy who makes me laugh constantly. Who knows, I could have had a girl with whom I had nothing in common. I certainly do not have any desire to have another baby to find out.

It probably is some pointless bit of research.

pagedown what a load of crap. Until I had dd (a bonus baby) I only had the four boys, my hair has always been long, I wear jeans a lot as they are practical but my clothes are nothing like my DPs' and never have been, bras for 32e cup boobs and fitted clothes etc. Heels, skirts/dresses at times but all my clothes are 'feminine' a style that suits my hour glass figure etc.

I have never been down trodden, and male dominated does not have to mean knackerd, down trodden or sexist. All of the males in my house pitch in with cleaning, cooking, housework etc. Its no more hard work than having a large number of any gender I imagine, having four boys is fun, I love having a gang of boys and now dd has joined that little gang, she loves the boys, refers to them as 'my boys' and they love her and they all play together etc, her gender hasn't made a diff tbh. But then my boys are all individuals regardless of their gender, I don't pigeon hole them because of their gender.

Is this the OP's first post? I also thought it was clunkily written and struck me straight away as not being a genuine poster.

Nobody really wonders about this and not enough to want to generate a debate about it. Unless they are a goady fuck, a stirrer or a journo looking for material.

My ds is approaching 3 and whilst pregnant with him just thought he'd be a girl - I'm not sure why, maybe because I'm one of 4 girls. And having several nieces I thought I would but I didn't mind either way.

When he was born I was just over joyed that he was ok and healthy. I really notice a lot more little boys now and see traits in them that I'd never noticed before- Like the endless energy for example.

I'm pregnant with no 2 and everyone assumes I want a girl do there is 1 of each etc. in fact I would love another boy but will really just be happy with 'it' once they arrive and all is ok.

I don't get people getting upset- how can you be upset when you have a lovely new baby to adore.

Interesting first post. Most mothers that I talk to love their babies as people rather than sexes.

I know some very well-dressed mothers of boys (even 3+) so I don't agree with Pagedown on that either.

I think grimbletart should make everyone think deeply. A healthy child is a real gift- how can you possibly say - 'glad to have a healthy child but actually they are a disappointment'.
I think it is wonderful, in those days of such choice, that you actually have no choice. The next step would have to be the 'right' sort of girl.

No, I think you are quite wrong.

Pagedown - I never was girly so in a way you could be describing me though i do make the effort when I want. Wearing jeans mostly and trainers, rarely wear makeup etc, kicking a ball at the park suits me down to the ground. Nothing downtrodden about it.

"I find a few mums of all boys (especially of 3+) seem to have totally lost their sense of self and have metamorphosed partly into a male themselves, short masculine haircuts, clothes that could have come from their husbands wardrobe and they just look really downtrodden. I imagine in some very male dominated households it's easier to conform with the majority. And it just all looks so bloody knackering."

Ah. Another poster to welcome to Mumsnet

What a stupid thing to post.

Erm no! I was relieved when ds1 was born & was a boy. And was even more relived when we found out dc2 was also a boy.
I wouldn't know what to do with girls.

Yabu

OP is not being unreasonable in that I can find you several threads by people who were disappointed to have a boy, I couldn't find you any about disappointment to have a girl. The mistake is to think that it reflects a majority view.

I haven't read past the first page but yabu!

I have one boy who I was just so happy to have...a healthy happy baby boy or girl was all we wanted...I will always want him regardless.

I didn't have a preference when pregnant...just to have a healthy baby was a dream come true.

Your theory clearlt does not apply to me!

If we were fortunate enough to be able to have another child I'd love another boy...equally I'd also love a girl...and my first dc, a boy, would still be just as precious to me.

Yabu!

To particularly politically correct to admit this, but I am so so pleased that my second child was a girl. I have one of each and, for me, it is just perfect. I have no favourites. My boy is my boy and I adore him. He is 2.7. My girl is 4 months old and already I call her my best friend. My mother, who had a boy and two girls, used to say... A son is a son until he gets married, a daughter is a daughter for life.

It's certainly true that many women prefer girls. But many is not most.

I find a few mums of all boys (especially of 3+) seem to have totally lost their sense of self and have metamorphosed partly into a male themselves, short masculine haircuts, clothes that could have come from their husbands wardrobe and they just look really downtrodden. I imagine in some very male dominated households it's easier to conform with the majority

haha, complete and utter ill informed shit really. I have 3 boys and me and my house couldnt be further from the truth..."conforming with the majority"?? thats hysterical!

I go ultrafeminine to counter the testosterone.

I would only have wanted a boy and I got a boy