To wonder about the age you give your kids alcohol?

[MatersMate]

so, this started with my Auntie and Uncle saying when you're 14 you cna have an alcoholic drink with a meal in a pub. Then we got talking about how old we were when we had our first glass of alcohol, my feckless Dad gave me homebrewed wine aged 8 and I was sick as a dog. Anyone have any under age drinkers?

I love these threads! People are SO against giving children alcohol it makes me laugh! Apparently giving drink to kids leads directly to later-life alcoholism. My experience happens to be the exact opposite of that but there we are...

My mum was aware of my cousin and I stealing beers from the booze table at family parties when I was around 10. My parents decided to let me get really good and drunk on Scrumpy Jack cider on a family holiday that year (this has turned into an old family anecdote in which I woke up several times in the night singing about needing the toilet). That same year I was allowed to get totally sloshed on martini rosso and lemonade at a family barbecue. I then used to spend all family holidays and barbecues and parties trying to get drunk again!

I went off those drinks eventually, and fascination with drinking and being drunk in general died off at quite a young age for me. By the time I was legally old enough to drink it was old news. As an adult I've never been much for binge drinking or getting paralytic.

Siblings all have similar stories (such as the sister who aged 15 got so drunk on shandy that she vomited all over the garden, or the brother who was allowed a drop of whiskey "for a cold" aged 11 and has never touched alcohol since).

Personally I think my parents had the right idea. A certain amount of freedom in controlled situations is no bad thing. My aunties took the same stance with my cousins. None of us have unhealthy relationships with alcohol as adults. We take the same stance with my nephew, who is 12 and is allowed to drink at all family occasions if he chooses to. I think the less taboo and exciting it is, the better as far as I'm concerned.

I was never 'given' any alcohol and I have not 'given' any alcohol to my children, but if I wanted to try my parents wine I was allowed to have a sip from about ?6 and I am doing the same with my DCs.

I see no need to absolutely prevent children from finding out what adults are drinking, while equally don't think we need to give any alcohol to our children.

Having said that I grew up in wine-growing country on the continent, wine was all around me all of the time and Just Not A Big Deal.

I drink about 5-6 U/wk now and have been near enough teetotal for 10+ years while my DCs were v young (I could not coupe with having wine for dinner and then being up several times a night to look after a baby - I had 4 ).

I don't really 'get' the hysteria around alcohol as I suspect that those of us fretting about it are probably having the conversations with our children around 'safe' drinking, whereas many people don't but don't worry about it.

I'm not sold on the idea of how your parents handle it being much of an influence on your own drinking habits. As I've said before, I have an older brother and sister. We were all allowed a small glass of wine with Sunday lunch from about 11 ish and were all force fed a cigar at about the same age.

My siblings rarely drink and have never smoked.

I'm a total lush, bordering on alcohol dependant and smoke.

I guess my point is that we are all individuals.

Hmm I can promise you that drench parents don't key their 5yo have a glass of wine

I think it depends what you call giving them alcohol. My dcs gave tried one small mouthful of alcohol since they were 6~7yo. On the unusual occasion that we have alcohol ourselves.
I'm happy for them to try and taste but no more.
As fur drinking a full glass? Probably not until they are 14~16yo.

Allowed a sip of something like port at 11.

Allowed a beer with my dinner at 14.

First had spirits when a relation of my mother died when I was 15 and she had to rush off and my father asked for a whisky and suggested I join him.

" ne. If children see a sensible attitude towards alcohol from a young age they're much less likely to go nuts once they're old enough to get hold of it themselves."
Simply not backed up by evidence. Recommendations (which are evidence based) are no alcohol before 15

Here is a nice story of irresponsibility , so 1987 , we all go to Pontins as an extended family , Brothers In law , Sisters In law , Parents , grandparents .A good laugh for about 20 of us . So Me and two brothers are suckers for Bingo .......at lunchtimes............Now this is the 80's people drink at lunchtimes , they leave dregs of drinks on table at end of session,DS1 known at the time as SFB goes on a round robin of all the empty glasses , and is completely pissed , (6 years old) He is now 32 two kids and normal (ish) .......................................

Booze played a very damaging role in my childhood.
Surrounded by alcoholism.

I keep alcohol far away from DCs.
What they go on to do as adults is up to them - but this house is and will always be alcohol and drug free.

sharon, the first time I as drunk was after a dinner party my parents had at home and my brother and I finished all the dregs. We were 4 and 6 and neither of us has issues with alcohol.

Stealth, I was wondering what the evidence was. Do you have a source? I'd be interested.

chief medical officer

Thanks, stealth - will read later.

We were given medicinal port when I was 7, after a very wet and cold and muddy day out. J and I finished off what the other children who didn't like it didn't have.

When I was 10, I downed a glass of gin - looking back, when we'd been called in from the garden to have some lemonade, it was actually quite unusual for them (the grown-ups) to have poured it out ready for us, but I had been running round, it was hot, I was thirsty, and I drank it straight down before I realised it didn't taste quite as expected.

I have a drink about 3 times a year these days, so it's just not something which happens in this house.

Husband and I don't really drink, so we hardly ever have alcohol in the house anyways. My extended family will have a glass of wine with dinner. I'd be okay with older teenagers (say 16 and up) having a glass of wine at family functions if they like. The legal drinking age is 18 where we live and 19 where my family lives.

My son is still an infant though, so we've got a while to think about it.

18. There is absolutely no need to give young children alcohol.

I can't believe this thread actually... I think it's really sad.

I also say 18. I cannot imagine why anyone would need to give children alcohol. My 20 year old didn't drink until she was 18.

Mine are 6 and 4 and I think have both tasted larger and wine. If they ask for a taste, they can...they don't like it though. Last Xmas they both had a fingers width of champagne in a glass, topped up with lemonade.

I think I'd let them have a shandy or spritzer on a special occasion from about 14 probably. Letting a 6 year old drink a beer with lunch is way ott!

I started on whisky at about 13. Mum was alcoholic though and she thought the whisky would be a solution to all my problems. Sadly it was not but thanks to aa I am 5 years sober.

Stealth do you know where the evidence is though? The recommendations aren't referenced. Genuinely interested, not being picky.

, afraid I don't :o will have a dig

We have home video showing me a bit puddled aged six at a cousins wedding as I kept taking sips from everyone's glasses. After that I would've been 10 or 11 when i was allowed a glass of bubbly at Christmas. Minus the wedding incident I will probably do the same with my daughter just water down the bubbly a bit!

I found this:

"Therefore, until further evidence shows otherwise, it seems prudent to advise caution when considering whether parents should allow adolescents to drink alcohol within the home. Further evidence in a Scottish setting is strongly advised to inform any further specific recommendations."

"None of the studies adequately described how much alcohol parents allowed their children to consume at home and only one study considered whether parents discussed how they felt about their children consuming alcohol. Thus it is not clear if there are ways of parents introducing alcohol to children within the home environment that may be beneficial to future adolescent drinking behaviours.

The components and factors of alcohol-specific parenting that reduce/promote alcohol consumption in adolescents are uncertain.

It is unclear if there are subgroups of adolescents that respond to alcohol-specific parenting in different ways."

from [[Evidence Paper on Parental Influence on Children’s Alcohol Use
Authors: Claire McLeod, and Catriona Matheson, Senior Research Fellow of the Centre of Academic Primary Care, University of Aberdeen
Date: September 2012
As commissioned by:
Current Evidence, Reference and Guidance on Addictions (CERGA) Group, NHS Grampian]]

In effect we don't know but just in case it's better to avoid alcohol?

I think they raise an important question: how much us being drunk by the teenager/child (a sip, a glass, as much as they want) and what us being said about alcohol.
Eg both if mines know for a long time what effect alcohol has ( from the bring happy and care free to being so drunk you get sick and pass out) and I now making sure they also know about the fact alcohol can make you go things you wouldn't normally do hence why you need to restrict yourself to small quantities.
I'm sure that what you say to your dcs as well as the example you give them (eg have they ever seen you drunk or bring sick from too much alcohol?) as at least as much importance than if they have a taste from time to time.

10ish here, DS first tried Newcastle Brown in a shot glass, DD although not quite 10 yet will be allowed a small splash of Champagne at Christmas this year to try. DS doesn't like it so will pass.
At our Christmas house party last year we caught our youngest daughter - just 18 months old at the time - dipping her fingers in her Grandmas wine and licking them clean... Apart from that she won't be trying it till she's older either. but at least she showed good taste, it was a nice wine

I'm amazed by this thread, my dd is 13.5 and I wouldn't dream of letting her have alcohol, definitely not before 16.