Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to let dd have a day off school because i miss her?

465 replies

LittleLisa78 · 22/05/2013 22:45

DD is in reception. DP works shifts and doesn't have a weekend off til July but does have many weekdays off. Youngest DD is 1 and very full on so elder DD has not had any real one on one time with me since she was born and has been asking repeatedly for it but it's difficult with dps shifts and extra curricular activities after school. She and I both just want a full day with each other having fun and doing things it's difficult to do when I have younger DD to look after too. AIBU to consider letting her have a day off school to do this?

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 23/05/2013 22:56

oh give over, WA, you are stretching credulity now

a little girl wandering round the classroom telling lies her mother put her up to because of her own neediness is hardly likely to enhance anyone's else's education

AnyFucker · 23/05/2013 22:57

by that logic, every snot nosed kid whose mother can't be arsed to get up on a monday morning is dragging every other child up to genius standard

SuburbanRhonda · 23/05/2013 22:58

Oh ok wondering, I skipped a couple of pages as everyone seemed to be saying what a lovely idea it was for OP to take her DD out of school for her own needs, not her DD's.

Maybe the comment was on one of those pages.

SuburbanRhonda · 23/05/2013 22:59

AnyFucker, you're on fire tonight!

Can I have a pint of what you're having?

Jan49 · 23/05/2013 23:00

Why not use the half term holiday to spend some one to one time with her whilst your DP is with your younger DD? Then spend more one to one days with your DD in the summer holidays on days when your DP is off work and can look after your youngest and use those to do the things close to home that your DD really wants to do. Cut down on extra-curriculum activities to spend more time with her. I can't believe that you spend every moment after school having to do things with your youngest and not able to give your older DD attention. If the only time after school that you spend not doing something with the youngest is spent doing things like preparing a meal, then have an easy meal or a picnic type meal prepared so you can spend some of the time with your DD instead.

I don't think having one day off school is the answer if your DD really needs and isn't getting any one to one time. It's just not enough.

I'm a bit puzzled that you're willing to take your DD out of school for a day but seem to be saying you haven't kept her off school when she's been ill. I don't think missing one day will do any harm to her schooling but it would be a little awkward if it came out that on the day she was"off sick" she was seen at an activity with you or she realised she'd missed something they did at school and she didn't even know she'd missed a day's school. Or if a stranger comments when you're out with her. One of my friends has a child at a religious school which ends early one day a week and has been hassled by strangers disapproving because they think her child should be at school.

AnyFucker · 23/05/2013 23:02

rhonda, a pint of what I am having would put you on your back

and you definitely wouldn't get up for the school run in the morning Wink

Xmasbaby11 · 23/05/2013 23:03

One day together is just one day. If you don't see enough of each other on your own, you need to change your routine.

wonderingagain · 23/05/2013 23:04

AF OP is not telling lies, she's lying to her daughter so dd won't have to lie to the teacher. That's responsible parenting, she's sacrificing her own credulity for the sake of her child. She's telling her she is ill, when she kind of is, really.

I like to look at the positives. Grin

AnyFucker · 23/05/2013 23:05

no, her daughter is not ill

op might be though

wonderingagain · 23/05/2013 23:05

AF DD* is not telling lies...

wonderingagain · 23/05/2013 23:06

She is, but she's not sure if she will be tomorrow and it could be construed that she is.

SuburbanRhonda · 23/05/2013 23:06

Make it a pint and a chaser then, AnyFucker.

Xmasbaby11, you've hit the nail on the head.

wonderingagain · 23/05/2013 23:06

Ill, that is.

ThoughtsPlease · 23/05/2013 23:07

OP I see that you say you posted a while ago complaining that her dad wanted her to miss school so he could have a longer weekend with her, but now you want her to miss school so you can spend more time with her? Presumably you do spend more time with her than he does anyway?

Double standards?

Oh and have you asked her dad if it is ok, seeing as you wouldn't allow him to do it?

SuburbanRhonda · 23/05/2013 23:07

"She's lying to her daughter ...that's responsible parenting."

WTF?

wonderingagain · 23/05/2013 23:08

Xmasbaby she has changed her routine, but it doesn't buy them much time.

I say she needs respite, but in the meantime, a day off is fine by me.

SuburbanRhonda · 23/05/2013 23:09

Respite? From what? Is her DD disabled?

SgtTJCalhoun · 23/05/2013 23:10

What do you mean when you say the OP might be ill AF?

AnyFucker · 23/05/2013 23:11

I think op may have a very bad case of selfishitis

there is a cure, but it's a very hard pill to swallow....

SgtTJCalhoun · 23/05/2013 23:11

Her younger dd has SN Rhonda.

Clarabellthecow · 23/05/2013 23:14

No SgtT she said het baby is "high needs" this is not the same as special needs.

SuburbanRhonda · 23/05/2013 23:15

Oh, ok, Sgt, I missed that. The OP just said she was very "full-on", so that SN bit must have been drip-fed later.

SuburbanRhonda · 23/05/2013 23:16

I think all children are "high-needs", aren't they? My two teenagers certainly are Grin

SgtTJCalhoun · 23/05/2013 23:16

In OP's post of 22.09 she mentions her younger dd's "SN" and explains this is why it is difficult for her DP to care for her.

SgtTJCalhoun · 23/05/2013 23:18

Well I would there's definitely a few cases of twatitis going round on this thread.