Ok, so this is the response I was expecting! And, maybe two months ago I would have felt the same. But then I actually looked into it. My oldest has ASKED to do a pageant and that's why I looked into it.
Pageants in this country are not all about the prettiest child. They are about personality. They tend to have four rounds (or outfits, talent, formal, themed and outfit of choice) and its about the child. From what I can see most don't plaster their children in fake tan and false eyelashes. In fact most don't use make up at all. The girls that do pageants are encouraged to raise money for charity's and their are sashes that can be won for the most fundraising etc. how is that different to brownies?
My daughters have both started dance festivals at 3. My oldest didn't start having success with her dancing until she was about 6. She is in a very competitive, very strong group of children who are all very talented and it disturbs me that for a lot of them, placing second isn't good enough. Tears and tantrums ensue because they haven't won. At pageants their are lots of 'awards' and they are judged on many aspects. I don't believe them to be 'beauty' competitions so much as ''personality" competitions. I would never cake my kids in fake tan or make them wear false eyelashes but a little bit of stage make up? Tastefully applied? I don't see the harm.
My oldest is currently a carnival princess (for the second time). I fail to see a huge difference. Again that is not a 'beauty thing' it is a way for Dd to represent her town, raising money for charity and being involved in the town. She makes a lot of friends with girls from neighbouring towns and enjoys the season going out to other towns and sitting on the float. She has, at her own request, entered the competition for that titles four times. This is the second time she has been picked and when she wasn't picked she didn't feel not good enough. She congratulated the children that did get picked and moved onto something else. She is quite mature in that sense.
My dd already does about as much dance as she possibly can. She plays the cornet, sings and reads. She is, I know, a child of ten and also enjoys things like riding her bike, trampolining and playing at her friends house. She knows that in mine and her fathers eyes she is always our princess and we are proud of her which is why she feels confident enough to say she wants to do pageants. As for her baby sister, we will always encourage her to do what she wants to do (within reason).
For the poster who said I was worried my dd was overweight, I have never said she is overweight, I was worried she might become overweight. She has cut down on the eating between meals and that was my concern. She is not as skinny as a lot of the girls she dances with but she is not fat either. We also found, when we went through her wardrobe that most her clothes were age 6-8 and so have been shopping for new ones! She is 10 after all!
As for dance being about the performance, yes and no. Most of the time you can tell which child an adjudicator will pick before they have even danced. The skinny one with good turnout and a long neck. For me, pageants appear to be more inclusive in that sense.
And for people saying its abusive to put my 3 year old on stage: try and keep her off! I actually think its abusive to not listen to what a child wants. If my children told me tomorrow they didn't want to dance anymore then that's fine. My children are happy and confident and that is as a result of the encouragement we have given them. It's not about being the prettiest. It's about enjoying dressing up. You tell me none of your kids have fairy dresses and play at being princesses?