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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To change my 5yo daughters name?

121 replies

HalfBakedCleverCookie · 10/05/2013 14:45

I am planning to change the surname of my 5yo daughter. She currently has my maiden name but uses my married name so I am going to change it officially to my married name.

However whilst I am doing that via deedpoll (that is the only way to do it due to various circs) I am wondering wether to change her first name also.

Her name is Katie, when I named her I didn't realise that Katie is short for Catherine and ever since I found out I have regretted not giving her a 'proper' name. She would still use Katie as her daily name but would have the option of using Catherine when she was older.

so WIBU to change both her names while I am at it or should I leave Katie alone and just change her surname?

OP posts:

PaWithABra · 11/05/2013 00:56

unless you call her 'marie'

PaWithABra · 11/05/2013 01:06

Actually 'Marie' is a better song . Call her that .

McNewPants2013 · 11/05/2013 02:59

My dd name is Katie to me it is her name. I think it's the best female name (biased of course )

chipmonkey · 11/05/2013 03:13

I made the mistake of calling ds1 an "official" name which I didn'r lik and he hates! And which MIL insisted on using for about a year.
So ds3 is Tom! Officially.

pmgkt · 11/05/2013 03:27

I'm a Katie not a Katherine, never been a problem. Keep it if she likes it.

KaFayOLay · 11/05/2013 08:32

I have a Katie, never ever has she been referred to as Katherine and nobody has ever asked if Katherine is her real name.
I wouldn't change it.

Original poster

HalfBakedCleverCookie · 11/05/2013 08:53

Thanks kitty the kids know themselves as married name though so I don't mind keeping it.

Thanks everyone, I am keeping Katie as she is, I would have never known about the Katherine link if it hadn't been for mumsnet anyway. I loved it then, I live it now so why mess with it.

Arf at choosing a name because you prefer a song. Not a bad idea as inspiration but not reason to change it at 5

OP posts:

2rebecca · 11/05/2013 09:47

I would change Katie to Katherine because I'm in the Katie is a nickname brigade, like Jamie, Tony, Davie , Mandy etc. At 5 I'd probably ask her opinion, also what does her dad think. Changing her surname seems a bit off if you've split up from her dad anyway. How can she not know what her surname really is if she's 5? Surely the school/ nursery call her by her real surname?

cluecu · 11/05/2013 11:31

I was baptised Katherine but called Katy from day 1. My mum wanted to give me a saint's name officially but knew Katy would be my name.

She spelled it with a 'y' as that made it seem a bit more unique so that's the only way I've ever used and I'm still the only Katy with a y that I know (apart from in the What Katy Did books)

KeepCoolCalmAndCollected · 11/05/2013 13:48

Definitely go for it - it's not up to anyone else but you.

LooseyMy · 11/05/2013 14:00

I've never understood the point of calling children a name they won't be addressed as. It just complicates life!

BlackholesAndRevelations · 11/05/2013 14:19

I've taught children whose names are not what's on their birth certificate, eg Toby who was really tobias, and eddie who was Edward. Both boys got very upset (as did their parents!) when they were called by the full names. Why bother?

2rebecca · 11/05/2013 14:35

I agree that a child won't be keen on a longer form of their name, but as an adult I don't see any disadvantage to having a longer more grown up version of your name to use if you wish.
"Becky" would be fine as a child but if that was on my birth certificate I don't have the option of the more elegant professional sounding Rebecca.

Original poster

HalfBakedCleverCookie · 11/05/2013 18:31

2rebecca, school call her by married surname, that is what I asked them to call her and they never questioned it.

Even though her dad and I have split up, me and her brother both have married surname which is why I want her to have it also.

OP posts:

2rebecca · 11/05/2013 19:48

Fair enough

whatsonyourplate · 11/05/2013 19:52

As the mother of a Kathryn, I think Katie has a higher chance of getting her name spelled correctly!

Gottalovecosta · 11/05/2013 20:36

Our son is called Sam - we decided we'd never call him Samuel and Sam is a 'proper' name. If he decides when he's older he'd like to have the fuller version of the name, he can choose to do that.

Anytime we're at hospital with him, they often call out 'Samuel Gottalovecosta.' despite his records all saying 'Sam'!

2rebecca · 11/05/2013 22:41

Sam is a nickname for Samuel, or Samantha.

mikkii · 11/05/2013 22:47

My friend's daughter is also Katie.

Please don't change her name, my son's names are Alessandro Valentino, we use Valentino, Tino for short. It is truly a PITA remembering to book his plane tickets to match his passport. We wish we had never done it. DD's both get called by the name on their passport ( well, ish....)

nooka · 11/05/2013 23:04

My children both have a formal name but are generally known by their nicknames. It's never caused a problem, nor do I understand why it might. The short forms are very closely linked to their formal names (like Jamie/James). My brother has always been known by the short form of his name, professionally and by friends and family. Seem completely normal to me, and I've never heard him complain.

Sure when flying etc the formal name is used, but that's not exactly a problem. My father was always known by his middle name, which is a bit more tricky, but he said it was no big deal (my mother complained, but he just responded to his 'other' name too).

BenjaminButton172 · 12/05/2013 09:31

Katie/jamie/sam are not nicknames. They are just names.

Why put a name on the birth certificate if u arent going to use it. I hate the 'our child is called alexander but we call him alex & we never use alexander'. Why didnt u just call the child alex. Its pointless.

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