to give cocaine to my rottweiler?

[nevergoogle]

and where does one buy swiss chard?

What will.cocaine do?

YANBU

After hunting down Swiss chard, it's probably the next thing to do in the "Lets see how stressful I can make my life" stakes.

You'd be denying him his animal rights if you didn't.

YABU I expect. I'd give a rottweiler a nice spliff.

YABU to give a dog cocaine, how the hell would it snort it with that wet nose.

Have you tried a swiss chard shop ?

true, i haven't considered the logistics of getting the cocaine into the bloodstream of my fictitious rottweiler and i can see the logic in the spliff idea.
it's true, mumsnet has advice on everything!

would i need to go to switzerland or chard?

chard is closer.

Chard it is then, but it will be chard chard. Is that ok ?

hang on, i'll ask the dog.

bloody hell don't expect anything sensible from the coke head dog.

hmm, he says the chard will likely be disappointing and to carry on with the alternative spring greens option for my curry.

Ocado have Chard

Also the Florette poncy lettuce salad bags have chard in. One has red chard and lambs lettuce.

It's worth perusing your local supermarkets poncy lettuce bags.

What do you need a pointless bunch of edible leaves and a stoned Rottweiler for?

I'm making a curry. The rest is pure attention seeking.

Can't you just give a chicken a bit of blow back from a bong and make chicken curry then?

Chicken would go in the pot better than the Rottweiler too.

And the pot would be easier to get in to the chicken good idea.

Right sorted.

So Swiss Chard and Rottweiler with a frisson of Coke is out.

Instead you are having

Rustic one pot Ganja Chicken with Ruby Chard.

NG ... Your problems are solved.

with hash potatoes.

Hash Potatoes

Mmmmmmm to MumsNet cooking threads.

Dammit now I'm hungry...

Thanks all

Roll coke into a ball mixed in with wax(soft wax) ,then shove it up dog"s bum,(works with humans)

I think you'd have to take coke first to get to the point where you are brave enough to shove balls up a larges dogs bum.