To think that even if you're sleazy enough to think wolf-whistling is a compliment...

[BedHanger]

There are some groups of women you'd spare from the honour of your attention?

Like, maybe, a sleep-deprived new mother with a month-old baby strapped to her chest?

Yeuch. Why do some men think this is ok?

I'm in Leeds! If you live here and your DH says I had some short red hair telling me to get my knob out and attempting to whistle, dont worry it was just me

I'm off builder objectifying soon I think.

I cant whistle at all so I will have to ask them to teach me then I can walk past whistling at them.

LaQueen That's the sort of whistle I want to learn! It would shit them right up. Watch me do it one day on a site where my dad is or his friends

I think part of the problem here is that we are discussing stuff on different levels. Some of us are talking about this on a political level, some of us are talking about it on a personal level. Nothing wrong with either, but they are different things.

It may not bother some personally, it may bother others. It may bother others on a political level, but not personally and vice versa.

Like Sparkly said, you are being used as a prop for masculine performance. That may bother you and it may not, but to take it as a compliment is ridiculous.

It's not about being offended at everything. Compliments are nice. If someone comes up to me and says "you have really nice eyes/a beautiful smile/nice shoes" then I really like that. It is nice, it is engaging with me on a human level.

Well, earlier on someone was suggesting that women who don't like it must be lacking in confidence something I don't think is in any way a blanket truth.

I think if you are the kind of person who thinks the whistling stopping when you are old = you are not attractive enough anymore, then you probably do have a skewed opinion about attractiveness and being 'attractive' is disproportionately important to you.

The assumption being that wolf whistling = statement of attractiveness, no wolf whistling = not attractive, old = ugly, ugly = no wolf whistling. Oh poor me, one day I will be old and therefore ugly and no one will whistle at me anymore.

men on the street whistle and cluck and harrass all kinds of women, children, vunerable people. People with disabilities get called out at by some people.

I think that if you read back quite a few posters on here have said they like it/it would make their day etc. If these people don't place any vale or worth on what these men are doing then why does it make them so happy?

Because they feel it validates their attractiveness would be my guess. Which I find sad and also probably not even true having read through what other posters have written with regards to male posturing in front of other men.

You may find it harmless 'fun' but many others do not.

Value not vale....[hmmm]

And again that would be not [hmmm]

Doing well today!

may I add - because of their disability not because I think they are ugly but because they are vulnerable and the kind of people who yell at people in the street are all about picking on the vulnerable.

I think if you are attractive then yes it is easy for attractiveness to become important to you. If you never have been then it never gains any importance to you. I am going more in to the compliments/attention thing though as opposed to wolf whistling. If people have always made a big deal out of what you look like and its always remarked on when you go places then you get almost reliant on it, and the loss of it scares you. It does sound silly and petty but I suppose it makes up a big part of your identity.

Attractiveness is very subjective, rustybusty and, to my mind, some younger women are not at all attractive and some older women are extremely attractive. Having seen women of all ages, shapes and sizes being whistled at, and laughed at (by some), it's really no indicator.

Even if the whistling and cat-calling wouldn't bother me, I certainly would take it as any kind of affirmation that I was attractive. Did you see Sparkling's post that explains what it actually is? I would find it very difficult to read that and continue a belief that to 'lose' that kind of validaton would be in any way a tough thing.

When somebody compliments you, it's such a stark difference.

Oh I know older women are attractive my mums nearly 60, and shes gorgeous. She has had a fair few men in their 20s asking her out. I am talking about the fact that it wont always last forever.

Also yeah I think I am going a bit off topic because I was counting getting lots of compliments in with the attention thing, but as others are said they are different.

Whistles are for dogs, not women. It's quite sad that so many people are saying they would be flattered by being treated like a dog.

OP, you should put this on your local hollaback page

It's also quite sad that a couple of posters have recognised it's disrespectful (eg - SP's builder whistling at her before he realised it was his boss's daughter) and still like it.

what men find attractive isn't always that beautiful to look at. There are lots of young women dolling themselves in a way that they think is attractive when really they are so much more pleasing to look at without all the make-up, hair pieces and so on. I see young women every day who clearly have lost all perspective of what beauty is and I would definitely wonder about their self-esteem.

sorry, some men.

I agree dueling if you need hair extensions or layers of make up the then your not genuinely attractive. I agree that look is ridiculous.

Duelling, maybe those girls aren't doing it for men? Maybe they're doing it because that's the look they like/it's fashionable/it's what their friends are doing.

What is "genuinely attractive" anyway? Look at Benedict Cumberbatch. Loads of women fancy him but if he came up to me in a club, I wouldn't give him the time of day.

mechanical they are doing it because of peer pressure from both men and women.

ICBINEG, how on earth do you know that? I mean, how do you know they're doing it any more than anyone else? I have peer pressure to look a certain way because of my job but I don't see anyone looking down their nose at me because the way I dress is "respectable".

Don't get me wrong, I see there are issues with plastering yourself with make-up and wearing heels everywhere, but it doesn't sit easy with me to point the finger and act like all these girls are self-esteem vacuums with no agency.

lighten up! the men working on a construction site outside my office often smile , say hello, whistle....it's abitof_fun!! and what's worse than being whistled at?...not being whistled at!

Did a man tell you that, karonski?

"but if he came up to me in a club, I wouldn't give him the time of day."

because you only talk to people who are attractive? You would talk to him at least, depending on his approach?

I don't know who he is but so long as he wasn't invading my space and was pleasant to me I would at least give him the time of day!

Oh RIIIIGHT, see I thought I hated being whistled at, but now I see that actually I hate NOT being whistled at.

Sorry all, my mistake.

Thanks karonski !!!!!!!!

Duelling, er, well this is well off topic, but I think it was clear that I meant I didn't find him in any way attractive.

Not that I only talk to people who are attractive...not sure why you'd draw that conclusion.