I bloody hate myself :-(

[M0naLisa]

As you may have see. My previous tread re: Drs.

I smoked throughout my pregnancy and and because of my incompetence and selfishness he has breathing difficulties. He's only 4months old and already suffering. Have been told its hereditary. But there will always be the what if what if what if!!

Please please if you are pregnant and still smoking. STOP!!

I should have known better being an asthma sufferer because of My mum smoking in pregnancy. I just thought is be one of the 'lucky' one.

I know I really should.

I suffered PND after ds1 and kept quiet until ds2 was born. So I'm
More cautious and wanting to protect ds3 more because my other sons as babies didn't get half the attention I give them as I was in denial about having children.

I'm constantly going to check on him and make sure he's not too warm, not too cold, still breathing. If I hear him cough I'm straight up to him.
I did CC with other ds and I won't so it with ds3