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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My friends 4 year old trashed Ds bedroom and broke his expensive birthday toy.

297 replies

Cannierelax · 28/03/2013 12:07

AIBU to want some form of compensation for the broken toy? Perhaps a replacement or even a similair but cheaper toy. My Ds is 5.5 and my friends Dd is 4.5. When i told my friend Ds was really upset she said, well that's what kids do. Em, not my child. Aibu? My friend was there when this happened and gave her Dd a row. She knew that the toy was broken but I said I would get DH to try and mend it. I've just messaged her saying DH Was not able to repair it at this point. At this point she stated that's what children do. I messaged back that it was a birthday gift he was looking forward to for several months. She hasn't messaged back.

OP posts:
Osmiornica · 28/03/2013 17:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fairyegg · 28/03/2013 17:34

I feel your pain but as you already know yabu. Lego is the biggest pita ever. I have boxes and tubs everywhere for different kits, clearly labelled with correct instructions inside. Then I have a separate box of random lego bricks for 'free play', plus a box just for 'people' and another for 'small important pieces'. Anything that has been built, and ds wants to keep it that way, is kept up very high or shut in my bedroom when other kids come to play. Trust me, you will soon be as mad anal as me. Enjoy your Easter weekend Lego building and in future always keep the instructions Smile

chocoflump · 28/03/2013 17:40

YABU- Its lego!!! Surely if she bought another one to replace it it would need assembled anyway!!!

ArtVandelay · 28/03/2013 17:47

That was brilliant! I read a bit and then had to go and do my playgroup. I've just caught up and think you are fab Cannie, for not getting the hump.

I would probably say sorry to your friend about it too so you can have a laugh about it in the near future :) it was pretty funny :)

sweetiepie1979 · 28/03/2013 17:50

It's not broken so no she shouldn't have to replace it. I think you are been unreasonable it's Lego! Thats a wee bit embarrassing your friend must be thinking your acting a bit odd.

Pandemoniaa · 28/03/2013 17:52

I strongly advise people to read the whole thread. Only things have moved on somewhat and I really don't think the OP needs anymore reminders that the Lego wasn't actually broken. She's accepted, with a very good grace, that her initial reaction was U.

mercibucket · 28/03/2013 18:05

Loved this thread :)

This happened to us too, op. Ds1 was gutted. Other child came from a more liberal lego family. We never actually bothered re-making it. Afaik it was also put away on a shelf so, think v v high shelves when friends are visiting

storynanny · 28/03/2013 18:05

I was very very anal about Lego sets 30 years ago when ds1 had first set. I did try to keep bits and pieces for each kit together, but being creative they always turned the models into something different. I did a lot of hyperventilating but eventually after some counselling was able to cope with this.
Fast forward to the present. Decided to de clutter a bit and raise some cash on eBay. Big discussion with sons and little grandsons re what to keep at nannys house for them to play with. " sell the sets and models and just keep a good selection of bricks, doors, windows, wheels and people" was the unanimous decision as apparently they were the best fun, the sets were a bit boring. I could have saved a lot of money over the years if I'd known that!
Good job I kept all the instructions. I spent about 10 evenings putting all the models back together and giving them a bit of a hose down in the bath. Sold them all on eBay for about £250 in total. And I've still got 2 boxes full of bits for visiting little ones to play with.
Moral of the story, just buy the bricks etc and don't bother with the expensive models!

EarlyInTheMorning · 28/03/2013 18:20

I used to be really anal about Lego too. I have spent whole mornings sorting them into colours. These days I even allow my DC to mix Lego and Playmobil together! I know!!!!ShockShockShock

Lueji · 28/03/2013 18:31

I can only imagine your friend's confused face as you said the toy was broken, that your DH would try to "mend it" and that he had not been able to "repair it".

I hope she's on MN. Wink

redskynight · 28/03/2013 18:34

Lego is for rebuilding. YABU. Totally rolling on the floor laughing here. It sounded like the child had smashed an ipad or something from your post.

anonymosity · 28/03/2013 18:36

You can get replacement instructions from LEGO. Check online, that should do it. I didn't read all 27 pages just the first few and last, so apologies if this is a repeat. And for the record, YABU, totally.

GetOeuf · 28/03/2013 18:51

Bless you OP - you have kept your cool in a pretty harsh onslaught of people calling you a lunatic etc!

I hope you are able to reassemble it - yes your DS must have been really upset, but it isn't the end of the world.

Original poster
Cannierelax · 28/03/2013 19:55

Thanks everyone for saving me the embarrassment of asking her to replace the model- oh the shame!!

OP posts:
TiggyD · 28/03/2013 19:56

I'm imagining the OP's house has an attic containing several hundred completed jigsaws that they don't want to break. Smile

And assuming the other parent paid the OP £70 for a replacement, it would come in a box already broken anyway.

Hope you can get it back together. Maybe with some glue this time.

MrsGeologist · 28/03/2013 20:12

Has anyone mentioned to OP that you can get Lego glue, for sticking together pieces so thy can never be taken apart again.

YABU though. It's Lego.

montage · 28/03/2013 20:22

Don't feel bad, OP this has been an excellent thread.

And you have handled the flaming with dignity.

And people will be coming on to it for a few hours yet, failing to read your recent posts and saying "it's lego!". Whereupon other posters will tell them to read the whole thread. And repeat.....

youmaycallmeSSP · 28/03/2013 20:27

Forget the jigsaws, I think the OP actually lives at Legoland. You definitely don't take apart those creations!

TiggyD · 28/03/2013 20:34

Lego glue?! Wow! I suppose some models are not meant for taking apart. Or for children either.

marquesas · 28/03/2013 20:35

What a great read, well done OP but I can't help but wonder what the odds are that the only 2 people on the planet who didn't know that lego could be dismantled and rebuilt ad infinitum ended up being married to eah other Grin

Did you both grow up in some strange land where lego was revered and never played with ?

LapsedPacifist · 28/03/2013 20:35

Ds used to get terribly distressed if any one broke his lego constructions. We used to move them out of his room (we had special large mats for him to build on) when he had friends over, just in case of accidents. But they were incredibly detailed things which he had built entirely from his imagination, very intricate and complex, with minifigs carefully positioned everywhere, and they took many hours, if not days to build. And he has ASD.

GetOeuf · 28/03/2013 20:40

Wow at Lego glue! That s a good idea isn't it in this case.

Original poster
Cannierelax · 28/03/2013 20:50

Would you like to the irony- we are all goinasian a family holiday to legoland for the Easter break. I purchased the Merlin pass yesterday!

OP posts:
Costypop · 28/03/2013 20:50

If its a Lego then I'm sure you can find the booklet for it online, and if your missing parts, you can order these too. A bit of a pita but no Lego is ever broken, it's Lego it's what it's supposed to do

Boggler · 28/03/2013 20:51

YABU

Crikey if I fell out with every parent of a child who accidentally or otherwise dismantled one of ds's precious Lego models that take DH and I hours and hours to make I'd have absolutely no friends left - that's the beauty of Leg you break it and remake it. Even if the bits are in the box of assorted Lego you can remake it, it might take a while but you can. No way should your friend have to pay to replace something that you still have and can be reassembled with some patience admittedly.